Lord Henry J. Splattington III started this discussion 6 years ago#96,705
Dear cousin, it is I, Lord Henry J. Splattington III, your English cousin! I trust all is well with you there in the States. I wanted to relay to you my regalia of the other night! I was enjoying a cheeky Nando's, when a rather rotund Welshgirl of about 28 stone entered! She sat down, but I ushered her unto my table. I ordered for her 15 roast chickens, wherefor she was grateful! I then coaxed her into my Rolls Royce van whilst ordering another 20 roast chickens. Well, I drove her to a bit of wood at the edge of the village. I offered her the chickens, to which she took like a rabid wolf. As she dined, I inhaled the vapors of her sphincter. As she terminated her repast, I kicked her in the spleen, pushed her out of the Rolls Royce, then drove away jauntily, rigoling and rigoling as she struggled to aright herself and find the way home! I then went back to Nando's and ordered a #4 chicken with a warm ale. I drove the Rolls Royce home, and watched reruns of Monty Python until 4 in the morning!