Topic: 2Day in Lafayette by thee re: hurri re: KANE KANE KANE
Anonymous A started this discussion 6 years ago #88,779
As I sat in my house all boarded up, listening to the sounds of Hurricane Barry totally blowing my hometown apart, I heard a CRASH in the livingroom. I rushed in and found a 532 lb negress that was blown right through my boarded up picture window. Quickly I got out my 18 volt DeWalt cordless screw gun and made the repairs needed to keep anymore shit from blowing further into my home.
As I completed the task at hand the 532 lb negress was starting to come to herself. I set my 18 volt Dewalt cordless screwgun down on the coffee table and watched as the 532 lb negress tried to figure out where she was. I could tell by the look on her Aunt Jamimah looking puss that she didn't have the foggiest idea where she was or what happened........which fit right into my plans!
I walked over in front of her as she was trying to focus her eyes and she spoke for the first times since her fat ass busted out my boarded up picture window. She said, "Where de fuck am I?" I replied, "Well negro woman you have landed in my home in the county of the land of OZ!" Then she said, Where de fuck is dat?" All I could do was laugh.
She was still very scattered brained which was just fine with me as I had decided that to kill time till this hurricane passed, I would go ahead and try to have some kind of sex with the 532 lb negress that had blown through my boarded up picture window.
I asked her if she was hungry and she didn't answer, just sat there on the livingroom floor dripping water all over my carpet. So with Hurricane Barry making havoc outside I decided to try and feed her something from my kitchen cabinet. I had plenty of stores as I was prepared for Hurricane Barry. I went into he kitchen cabinet and found a can of Spam, which I opened and brought out to her. I broke off a chunk and handed it to her. She took the offering and started to eat. While she was doing this I lifted up her skirt and started to sniff her butt. It didn't really have the smell I needed to get excited as she had been wallowing around for God knows how many hours in Hurricane Barry before she blowed through my boarded up picture window. And now it seemed that all of the moisture Barry was carrying washed away her negro poop scent.....It was starting to piss me off.
After the negress finished the chunk of Spam I gave her I asked her if she has to use the restroom and she spoke again..."Yes I need to take a dump!" FANTASTIC! I told the 532 lb negress that my toilet was out of commission because of the hurricane but I could fix her a place to crap. I went into my utility room and came back with a 5 gallon Porter paint bucket. I told the 532 lb negress to shit in that. Well she picked her fat ass up and hiked her dress, pulled down her cotton underpants and sat on the 5 gallon bucket CRUSHING IT on my already wet living room floor. I was beside myself..Finally I told her to just shit on my floor...I needed her with a soiled butthole and I needed it NOW! So the 532 lb negress squated on my livingroom floor and grunted...........nothing happened. She grunted again...still nothing. She was grunting so fucking hard that I could hear her grunts over the noise outside that Barry was making!!! Finally I said, "please negro lady will you poop for me!?" and she said, "I' be sorry but I' reckon I be constipated. *sigh*
That was it for me. Frustration took over! Here I was trying to ride out a hurricane, and then some negro woman comes busting through my boarded up picture window, lands on my living room floor and now she is telling me she can't shit for me!!!! I broke.........Quick as a panther I came around with a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick catching her in the small of the back. She pitched forward and as I jumped forward to attack her while she was down I slipped on the crushed Porter paintbucket and twisted my ankle...Now I was really mad! I hobbled over and drug her to the front door all 532 lbs of her. I took my 18 volt DeWalt cordless screw gun and took the board off my front door. I then pulled out my dick and jacked it furiously at the 532 lb negress but could not come, my ankle was hurting to bad, and she did not smell right. So I just ended up pissing all over her..and at that moment the major force of Barry came through and she was sucked back out of my house and gone forever!
I quickly boarded up my front door and hobbled back into my kitchen where I made me a Tuna fish sandwich, a bowl of Campbells Vegtable Beef soup (heated on my Burns-o-matic camp stove) and a diet Dr Pepper. I went back to my bedroom where I fired up my battery powered tv, popped in a VHS tape of All In The Family and ate and watched tv till I dozed off.
As I completed the task at hand the 532 lb negress was starting to come to herself. I set my 18 volt Dewalt cordless screwgun down on the coffee table and watched as the 532 lb negress tried to figure out where she was. I could tell by the look on her Aunt Jamimah looking puss that she didn't have the foggiest idea where she was or what happened........which fit right into my plans!
I walked over in front of her as she was trying to focus her eyes and she spoke for the first times since her fat ass busted out my boarded up picture window. She said, "Where de fuck am I?" I replied, "Well negro woman you have landed in my home in the county of the land of OZ!" Then she said, Where de fuck is dat?" All I could do was laugh.
She was still very scattered brained which was just fine with me as I had decided that to kill time till this hurricane passed, I would go ahead and try to have some kind of sex with the 532 lb negress that had blown through my boarded up picture window.
I asked her if she was hungry and she didn't answer, just sat there on the livingroom floor dripping water all over my carpet. So with Hurricane Barry making havoc outside I decided to try and feed her something from my kitchen cabinet. I had plenty of stores as I was prepared for Hurricane Barry. I went into he kitchen cabinet and found a can of Spam, which I opened and brought out to her. I broke off a chunk and handed it to her. She took the offering and started to eat. While she was doing this I lifted up her skirt and started to sniff her butt. It didn't really have the smell I needed to get excited as she had been wallowing around for God knows how many hours in Hurricane Barry before she blowed through my boarded up picture window. And now it seemed that all of the moisture Barry was carrying washed away her negro poop scent.....It was starting to piss me off.
After the negress finished the chunk of Spam I gave her I asked her if she has to use the restroom and she spoke again..."Yes I need to take a dump!" FANTASTIC! I told the 532 lb negress that my toilet was out of commission because of the hurricane but I could fix her a place to crap. I went into my utility room and came back with a 5 gallon Porter paint bucket. I told the 532 lb negress to shit in that. Well she picked her fat ass up and hiked her dress, pulled down her cotton underpants and sat on the 5 gallon bucket CRUSHING IT on my already wet living room floor. I was beside myself..Finally I told her to just shit on my floor...I needed her with a soiled butthole and I needed it NOW! So the 532 lb negress squated on my livingroom floor and grunted...........nothing happened. She grunted again...still nothing. She was grunting so fucking hard that I could hear her grunts over the noise outside that Barry was making!!! Finally I said, "please negro lady will you poop for me!?" and she said, "I' be sorry but I' reckon I be constipated. *sigh*
That was it for me. Frustration took over! Here I was trying to ride out a hurricane, and then some negro woman comes busting through my boarded up picture window, lands on my living room floor and now she is telling me she can't shit for me!!!! I broke.........Quick as a panther I came around with a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick catching her in the small of the back. She pitched forward and as I jumped forward to attack her while she was down I slipped on the crushed Porter paintbucket and twisted my ankle...Now I was really mad! I hobbled over and drug her to the front door all 532 lbs of her. I took my 18 volt DeWalt cordless screw gun and took the board off my front door. I then pulled out my dick and jacked it furiously at the 532 lb negress but could not come, my ankle was hurting to bad, and she did not smell right. So I just ended up pissing all over her..and at that moment the major force of Barry came through and she was sucked back out of my house and gone forever!
I quickly boarded up my front door and hobbled back into my kitchen where I made me a Tuna fish sandwich, a bowl of Campbells Vegtable Beef soup (heated on my Burns-o-matic camp stove) and a diet Dr Pepper. I went back to my bedroom where I fired up my battery powered tv, popped in a VHS tape of All In The Family and ate and watched tv till I dozed off.
(Edited 2 minutes later.)
tteh !MemesToDNA joined in and replied with this 6 years ago, 53 seconds later[^] [v] #1,015,107
Anonymous C joined in and replied with this 6 years ago, 50 seconds later, 1 minute after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,108
*Tropical storm Barry
tteh !MemesToDNA replied with this 6 years ago, 18 seconds later, 2 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,109
i miss when we used to tinychat while drunk
i remember you correcting my use of german cases to me while we were both trollied, and then you'd suggest wines (which I could barely afford)
good times
i remember you correcting my use of german cases to me while we were both trollied, and then you'd suggest wines (which I could barely afford)
good times
(Edited 53 seconds later.)
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 6 years ago, 51 seconds later, 2 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,110
Pierre Splatters joined in and replied with this 6 years ago, 4 seconds later, 2 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,111
I seem to remember that happening to me once lol
tteh !MemesToDNA replied with this 6 years ago, 44 seconds later, 3 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,113
@1,015,110 (A)
I wish we could! I never webcam'd or voice chatted, but I did enjoy those. IRC just isn't the same.
I wish we could! I never webcam'd or voice chatted, but I did enjoy those. IRC just isn't the same.
Pierre Splatters replied with this 6 years ago, 14 seconds later, 3 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,115
@1,015,110 (A)
> Why can't we revive Tinychat parties?
Were them the ones where you had the cam chats?
> Why can't we revive Tinychat parties?
Were them the ones where you had the cam chats?
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 6 years ago, 38 seconds later, 4 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,116
tteh !MemesToDNA replied with this 6 years ago, 36 seconds later, 5 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,119
I remember when I first revealed the "sK"/"UltimateCake" tripcode theft in Tinychat, and that whole drama unfolding. I miss those times.
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 6 years ago, 27 seconds later, 5 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,121
Pierre Splatters replied with this 6 years ago, 11 seconds later, 5 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,122
@1,015,116 (A)
Remember that time I came in and had that big doll on camera? I got drunk and beat the snot out of her on cam ha ha ha
Remember that time I came in and had that big doll on camera? I got drunk and beat the snot out of her on cam ha ha ha
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 6 years ago, 29 seconds later, 6 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,123
tteh !MemesToDNA replied with this 6 years ago, 23 seconds later, 6 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,125
@1,015,121 (A)
They really were. I honestly really miss those times. Filled with drama but we were all having fun.
I mean, life has progressed since then, but still. Nostalgia.
They really were. I honestly really miss those times. Filled with drama but we were all having fun.
I mean, life has progressed since then, but still. Nostalgia.
(Edited 36 seconds later.)
Pierre Splatters replied with this 6 years ago, 12 seconds later, 6 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,126
I kept giving her drinks and she kept dribbling them down her face so I beat her up lol
Anonymous C replied with this 6 years ago, 1 minute later, 8 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,127
Pierre Splatters replied with this 6 years ago, 13 seconds later, 8 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,128
@1,015,125 (tteh !MemesToDNA)
> They really were. I honestly really miss those times. Filled with drama but we were all having fun.
>
> I mean, life has progressed since then, but still. Nostalgia.
I didn't get to make many of them but when I did I always had fun. They were a blast!
> They really were. I honestly really miss those times. Filled with drama but we were all having fun.
>
> I mean, life has progressed since then, but still. Nostalgia.
I didn't get to make many of them but when I did I always had fun. They were a blast!
terri !RwordOooFE joined in and replied with this 6 years ago, 2 hours later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,186
@1,015,110 (A)
> Why can't we revive Tinychat parties?
i feel like we had a handful more posters who weren't obsessive/evil be trolls and more US posters so the timezone thing wasn't such an issue
> Why can't we revive Tinychat parties?
i feel like we had a handful more posters who weren't obsessive/evil be trolls and more US posters so the timezone thing wasn't such an issue
terri !RwordOooFE double-posted this 6 years ago, 3 minutes later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,187
Also great story
Anonymous G joined in and replied with this 6 years ago, 48 minutes later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,192
@1,015,186 (terri !RwordOooFE)
Legend has it that syntax records every word and takes extensive notes.
Legend has it that syntax records every word and takes extensive notes.
Anonymous H joined in and replied with this 6 years ago, 1 hour later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,198
@previous (G)
Legend has it that syntax invented the written language and forgotten how to use it due to having suffered from dementia since 1045ad
Legend has it that syntax invented the written language and forgotten how to use it due to having suffered from dementia since 1045ad
terri !RwordOooFE replied with this 6 years ago, 32 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,199
Bilbo !RwordOooFE joined in and replied with this 6 years ago, 17 hours later, 23 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,015,465
@1,015,186 (terri !RwordOooFE)
We had loads of actual human beings that we don't have now. We need to force them to all come back.
We had loads of actual human beings that we don't have now. We need to force them to all come back.