Topic: How To: Respond to the R-Word
Mr Steven mnuchin started this discussion 7 years ago #85,373
How to approach it:
If others should use the R-Word (retard or retarded), it is important
to know how to respond appropriately without being defensive or angry. Knowing what
to say, especially when dealing with different groups of people, is a critical component
in getting your message across effectively and respectfully.
Dealing with different groups of people:
Peers - If someone your age argues with you about the R-Word campaign, consider
sharing your perspective. Tell them your story and about your involvement to show
them why it is hurtful to you and then explain how the word, and similar attitudes, is
hurtful to others too. Explain to them clearly and calmly that social injustice is always
wrong and that everyone deserves to be treated with respect. No one deserves to be
made fun of. Make sure your tone is friendly and do not sound like you are talking
down to them.
Adults/Authority Figures - It is important to always be courteous and respectful.
Everyone can have different opinions, as we certainly do not have to agree, nor do we
want to argue. Judging someone for not agreeing with you will not help. Make sure
they are aware that use of the R-Word is a form of social injustice; it devalues people
with intellectual disabilities and hurts those with and without intellectual disabilities. It
may be helpful to tell them about your personal experience with the campaign.
Respecting their opinion is important to reaching an understanding; you must be careful
to not sound condescending or rude. It may be better to approach an authority figure
alone to discuss their use of the R-Word so it does not look like you are attempting to
put them down or be disrespectful in front of a group.
Strangers- If you hear a stranger use the R-Word, gauge the situation to see if it is
appropriate to respond. If the environment or person seems unreceptive or unsafe, it
may not be a good time to spread the word - safety is always important. It is best to
approach strangers only if you are in a situation in which they seem approachable and
where you may be in their company for an extended amount of time. For instance, if
you are walking by someone on the street and someone says the R-Word, that may not
be an appropriate time to speak out. However, if you are at a party and someone is
constantly using the R-Word, it may be okay to speak up! Be friendly, polite and explain
the cause.
If others should use the R-Word (retard or retarded), it is important
to know how to respond appropriately without being defensive or angry. Knowing what
to say, especially when dealing with different groups of people, is a critical component
in getting your message across effectively and respectfully.
Dealing with different groups of people:
Peers - If someone your age argues with you about the R-Word campaign, consider
sharing your perspective. Tell them your story and about your involvement to show
them why it is hurtful to you and then explain how the word, and similar attitudes, is
hurtful to others too. Explain to them clearly and calmly that social injustice is always
wrong and that everyone deserves to be treated with respect. No one deserves to be
made fun of. Make sure your tone is friendly and do not sound like you are talking
down to them.
Adults/Authority Figures - It is important to always be courteous and respectful.
Everyone can have different opinions, as we certainly do not have to agree, nor do we
want to argue. Judging someone for not agreeing with you will not help. Make sure
they are aware that use of the R-Word is a form of social injustice; it devalues people
with intellectual disabilities and hurts those with and without intellectual disabilities. It
may be helpful to tell them about your personal experience with the campaign.
Respecting their opinion is important to reaching an understanding; you must be careful
to not sound condescending or rude. It may be better to approach an authority figure
alone to discuss their use of the R-Word so it does not look like you are attempting to
put them down or be disrespectful in front of a group.
Strangers- If you hear a stranger use the R-Word, gauge the situation to see if it is
appropriate to respond. If the environment or person seems unreceptive or unsafe, it
may not be a good time to spread the word - safety is always important. It is best to
approach strangers only if you are in a situation in which they seem approachable and
where you may be in their company for an extended amount of time. For instance, if
you are walking by someone on the street and someone says the R-Word, that may not
be an appropriate time to speak out. However, if you are at a party and someone is
constantly using the R-Word, it may be okay to speak up! Be friendly, polite and explain
the cause.
Mr Steven mnuchin (OP) double-posted this 7 years ago, 29 seconds later[^] [v] #978,177
Common Arguments:
“I have freedom of speech, so I can say whatever words I want!”
Response- You may have freedom of speech, but is that any excuse to bully
someone? Just because you can say something, doesn’t mean that you should,
especially when it may hurt someone’s feelings; having the right to do something
doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do.
“It’s just a word --How is it different than any other swear word?”
Response- The R-Word is different from most swear words because it
specifically targets a select group of people. That makes it especially harmful,
unlike other swear words that don’t target any specific group.
“I use that word to make a negative statement about something, it’s usually
not towards a person.”
Response – Using the R-Word in a negative manner to put down someone or
something is a derogatory use of the word. You are hurting someone’s feelings,
as using that word negatively belittles people with intellectual disabilities.
“How can saying “retard or retarded” be social injustice?”
Response – When we use a word to categorize an individual, or object, in a
demeaning or disrespectful way, we are disregarding those people. Those
individuals have the same hopes and dreams as we do, so why would we want to
demean them by minimizing their value in our society? That is the social
injustice – they often don’t have the same opportunities as we do in school,
community living or employment. Just saying that word reinforces the
limitations we impose on them. Our goal is to include everyone equally, fairly,
treat them with respect, and not limit anyone to a stereotype.
“I have freedom of speech, so I can say whatever words I want!”
Response- You may have freedom of speech, but is that any excuse to bully
someone? Just because you can say something, doesn’t mean that you should,
especially when it may hurt someone’s feelings; having the right to do something
doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do.
“It’s just a word --How is it different than any other swear word?”
Response- The R-Word is different from most swear words because it
specifically targets a select group of people. That makes it especially harmful,
unlike other swear words that don’t target any specific group.
“I use that word to make a negative statement about something, it’s usually
not towards a person.”
Response – Using the R-Word in a negative manner to put down someone or
something is a derogatory use of the word. You are hurting someone’s feelings,
as using that word negatively belittles people with intellectual disabilities.
“How can saying “retard or retarded” be social injustice?”
Response – When we use a word to categorize an individual, or object, in a
demeaning or disrespectful way, we are disregarding those people. Those
individuals have the same hopes and dreams as we do, so why would we want to
demean them by minimizing their value in our society? That is the social
injustice – they often don’t have the same opportunities as we do in school,
community living or employment. Just saying that word reinforces the
limitations we impose on them. Our goal is to include everyone equally, fairly,
treat them with respect, and not limit anyone to a stereotype.
Mr Steven mnuchin (OP) triple-posted this 7 years ago, 47 seconds later, 1 minute after the original post[^] [v] #978,178
Key Messages and Talking Points:
Young people like myself from all around the world are taking a stand in raising
awareness about the dehumanizing and hurtful effects of the words “retard” or
“retarded” and are helping encourage others to think before they speak!
We ask that YOU help us change the conversation and help eliminate the
demeaning use of the R-Word from today’s speech and replace it with “respect.”
We are asking for your help in creating a more accepting world for people with
intellectual and developmental disabilities and all those people that may appear
different, but have unique gifts and talents to share with the world.
We’re asking every person - young and old – to help eliminate the demeaning
use of the R-Word–a common taunt used to make fun of others. Often
unwittingly, the word is used to denote behavior that is clumsy or hopeless.
However, whether intentional or not, the word conjures up a painful stereotype
of people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. It hurts. Even if you
don’t mean it that way.
People with intellectual and developmental disabilities are fully capable of
enjoying and sharing life experiences – listening to music, playing video games,
watching the latest movies, and yes, having fun – as well as working together
toward athletic excellence and one-to-one friendships as demonstrated
constantly through Special Olympics and Best Buddies International. They can
attend school, work, drive cars, get married, participate in decisions that affect
them, and contribute to society in many positive ways.
Special Olympics’ Multi-National Public Opinion Study of Attitudes toward
People with Intellectual Disabilities, conducted by Gallup, reveals that
throughout the world, over 60 percent of people still believe that people with
intellectual disabilities should be segregated in schools and in the workplace.
This is intolerable. We need massive attitude change now to attack and reverse
the stigma that is destructive to the lives of people with intellectual disabilities
and a barrier to their growth.
Did you know that by casually using the word “retard(ed)” to refer to an action
as less than ideal you are making someone with an intellectual disability feel less
than human - whether you mean to or not? Demeaning any of our fellow human
beings by using inappropriate words toward any population negatively impacts
all of us.
For more information, please visit www.r-word.org
Young people like myself from all around the world are taking a stand in raising
awareness about the dehumanizing and hurtful effects of the words “retard” or
“retarded” and are helping encourage others to think before they speak!
We ask that YOU help us change the conversation and help eliminate the
demeaning use of the R-Word from today’s speech and replace it with “respect.”
We are asking for your help in creating a more accepting world for people with
intellectual and developmental disabilities and all those people that may appear
different, but have unique gifts and talents to share with the world.
We’re asking every person - young and old – to help eliminate the demeaning
use of the R-Word–a common taunt used to make fun of others. Often
unwittingly, the word is used to denote behavior that is clumsy or hopeless.
However, whether intentional or not, the word conjures up a painful stereotype
of people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. It hurts. Even if you
don’t mean it that way.
People with intellectual and developmental disabilities are fully capable of
enjoying and sharing life experiences – listening to music, playing video games,
watching the latest movies, and yes, having fun – as well as working together
toward athletic excellence and one-to-one friendships as demonstrated
constantly through Special Olympics and Best Buddies International. They can
attend school, work, drive cars, get married, participate in decisions that affect
them, and contribute to society in many positive ways.
Special Olympics’ Multi-National Public Opinion Study of Attitudes toward
People with Intellectual Disabilities, conducted by Gallup, reveals that
throughout the world, over 60 percent of people still believe that people with
intellectual disabilities should be segregated in schools and in the workplace.
This is intolerable. We need massive attitude change now to attack and reverse
the stigma that is destructive to the lives of people with intellectual disabilities
and a barrier to their growth.
Did you know that by casually using the word “retard(ed)” to refer to an action
as less than ideal you are making someone with an intellectual disability feel less
than human - whether you mean to or not? Demeaning any of our fellow human
beings by using inappropriate words toward any population negatively impacts
all of us.
For more information, please visit www.r-word.org
Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 7 years ago, 18 minutes later, 19 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #978,189
Anonymous B double-posted this 7 years ago, 19 seconds later, 19 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #978,190
I already avoid this word but good post 8/8 would read again
(Edited 15 seconds later.)
Mr Steven mnuchin (OP) replied with this 7 years ago, 28 minutes later, 48 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #978,196
You also can't say retard to gay retards I don't think the article made that clear
The retards being gay has no bearing on whether you can call them retarded or not
The retards being gay has no bearing on whether you can call them retarded or not
Anonymous C joined in and replied with this 7 years ago, 44 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #978,211
@previous (Mr Steven mnuchin)
So all of that text, and it turns out retarded, is still a very useful word.
So all of that text, and it turns out retarded, is still a very useful word.
Anonymous D joined in and replied with this 7 years ago, 5 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #978,215
This is respected.
Anonymous E joined in and replied with this 7 years ago, 5 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #978,221
crazy talk..
Sheila LaBoof joined in and replied with this 7 years ago, 2 hours later, 4 hours after the original post[^] [v] #978,265
That's a lot of words for a retard
Mr Steven mnuchin (OP) replied with this 7 years ago, 16 minutes later, 4 hours after the original post[^] [v] #978,268
Meta !Sober//iZs joined in and replied with this 7 years ago, 31 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #978,269
Retards ?
Meta !Sober//iZs double-posted this 7 years ago, 19 seconds later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #978,270
It really do be like that ?
Sheila LaBoof replied with this 7 years ago, 28 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #978,274
@978,268 (Mr Steven mnuchin)
oh I know that real Down's syndromer guys can be great and I have wanted that there be radio and tv talk shows where they sit and talk about stuff because that could be great
but all those words in the OP were fuckin retarded
oh I know that real Down's syndromer guys can be great and I have wanted that there be radio and tv talk shows where they sit and talk about stuff because that could be great
but all those words in the OP were fuckin retarded
Anonymous H joined in and replied with this 7 years ago, 1 hour later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #978,297
You think you're advanced, but you're actually retarded.