Topic: Is Marmite™ on the anus a legitimate sexual assault prevention method?
Anonymous A started this discussion 8 years ago #75,333
Asking for a friendAnonymous A (OP) double-posted this 7 years ago, 6 months later[^] [v] #939,755
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Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 7 years ago, 9 minutes later, 6 months after the original post[^] [v] #939,760
Anal application of Marmite™ has been shown to attract dogs willing to lick it off your anus. It will only prevent sexual assault in that would-be assailants will have to fight off packs of hungry dogs before and during any assault.
Anal Marmite™ is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Those not having a dog-ready ass are not advised to begin Anal Marmite™ treatments. Discontinue using Anal Marmite™ if you experience skin irritation, fear of dogs, self-doubt, sexual inadequacy, or trolling. Consult a physician to see if Anal Marmite™ is right for you. If you cannot afford your Anal Marmite™, then Minichan may be able to help.
Anal Marmite™ is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Those not having a dog-ready ass are not advised to begin Anal Marmite™ treatments. Discontinue using Anal Marmite™ if you experience skin irritation, fear of dogs, self-doubt, sexual inadequacy, or trolling. Consult a physician to see if Anal Marmite™ is right for you. If you cannot afford your Anal Marmite™, then Minichan may be able to help.