Topic: The Smelly Princess
Catherine !TGirlYJKXM started this discussion 8 years ago #72,638
The Smelly Princess
Once upon a time there lived a princess. This princess was average looking compared to other girls of the land.“Oh, how I wish I were beautiful!” she would say to herself in her chambers.
The princess would never leave her chambers or the castle in fear that the people would find her too hideous to look upon.
This wasn’t the truth, for beauty was in the eyes of the beholder, and many in the land thought she was pretty enough for a husband.
The problem was that she was smelly and didn’t bathe regularly.
One evening her mother, the queen, came to recruit her for a feast.
“Dear, I know you think you are ugly, but you really should participate in the feast,” she said through the door of the princess’ chambers.
“Mother, I cannot show my face around the people, they would only show disgust and I shall ruin the festivities,” the princess responded.
“No, you wouldn’t, dear, trust me,” the mother said trying to console her daughter, “if you come down and get ready then I will make it worth your wild.”
The princess didn’t want to ruin everyone’s time, but she also didn’t want to disappoint mother. So, she slowly unlocked the door to her chambers and went to the wardrobe to pick out something to wear. After she was dressed she slowly went down the stairs to the main hall where the feast was transpiring.
Everyone there stopped and looked at her. They haven’t seen the princess in a long time and felt honored to be graced by her presence. The queen and king took their seats at the dining table as the king prepared to present a toast. The princess took the seat farthest away from the attendants knowing that their looks earlier must surely have been from her disgusting appearance. The king raised his glass and gave the toast.
We hereby gather today to celebrate,
Celebrate the good harvest that was bestowed upon us.
We also honor my daughter, your princess, for being here today.
She is the most beautiful woman in all the land.
The princess felt embarrassed knowing that her father would say anything to make his daughter feel content with herself. Though, she still appreciates the gesture.
After the feast, the gentlemen would approach the ladies and engage in dance. The princess knew that no man would wish to pursue her, but she soon found that she was wrong. A handsome man, young and tall, a prince from a foreign land approached her.
“May I have this dance?” he asked her.
“Only if you don’t care that I am ugly,” the princess responded with a sad tone to her voice.
“Ha!” laughed the prince, “that was a good joke, m’lady, but you are not ugly.”
It was then when a foul stench reached the prince’s nose. It was a scent that was unworthy of belonging to a person of such nobility. It was a scent of a person who hasn’t bathed in weeks or months.
The prince looked over at the princess and asked, “Do you smell something? It smells foul.”
The princess stopped to find the smell.
Unable to tolerate the stench, the prince said to her, “I think it’s you that this odor stems, my apologies, m’lady, but I cannot dance with you this evening.”
The princess watched as the prince walked away. He was the first man willing to dance with her and she soon realized the reason why she wasn’t a married woman.
“This whole time I thought it was because I was ugly, when really, it was because I smelled bad,” she said to herself, “I should really bathe more often.”
Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 8 years ago, 5 minutes later[^] [v] #869,460
Catherinedraad:dr
Anonymous C joined in and replied with this 8 years ago, 3 minutes later, 8 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #869,461
oh ffs
Anonymous E joined in and replied with this 8 years ago, 8 minutes later, 16 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #869,467
@Cathy
You and Matt could maybe collaborate on a book of fairy tales if you don't mind rewriting the princess with more poop and fart material.
You and Matt could maybe collaborate on a book of fairy tales if you don't mind rewriting the princess with more poop and fart material.
(Edited 32 seconds later.)
..... !2Nu9nWUn.U joined in and replied with this 8 years ago, 35 minutes later, 52 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #869,473
lol
Green !BEERiVqJJw joined in and replied with this 8 years ago, 3 minutes later, 55 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #869,474
dr
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU joined in and replied with this 8 years ago, 17 hours later, 18 hours after the original post[^] [v] #869,756
Wasn't this a SpongeBob episode
Anonymous I joined in and replied with this 8 years ago, 2 hours later, 20 hours after the original post[^] [v] #869,774
@previous (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
> Wasn't this a SpongeBob episode
yeah except they went to a movie theater and not a dance
> Wasn't this a SpongeBob episode
yeah except they went to a movie theater and not a dance
Anonymous J joined in and replied with this 8 years ago, 35 minutes later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #869,776
Anonymous K joined in and replied with this 8 years ago, 45 minutes later, 22 hours after the original post[^] [v] #869,780
Sheila LaBoof joined in and replied with this 8 years ago, 1 minute later, 22 hours after the original post[^] [v] #869,781
Anonymous J replied with this 8 years ago, 8 minutes later, 22 hours after the original post[^] [v] #869,783
@previous (Sheila LaBoof)
Is that supposed to be Angela Merkel?
@869,780 (K)
I vaguely recall that now you mention it
Is that supposed to be Angela Merkel?
@869,780 (K)
I vaguely recall that now you mention it
Sheila LaBoof replied with this 8 years ago, 36 minutes later, 22 hours after the original post[^] [v] #869,804
@previous (J)
yeah, though all I searched for was "unflattering caricature" and this one caught my fancy
yeah, though all I searched for was "unflattering caricature" and this one caught my fancy
Catherine !TGirlYJKXM (OP) replied with this 8 years ago, 54 minutes later, 23 hours after the original post[^] [v] #869,819
@869,756 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
@869,780 (K)
I remember that episode now. Didn't the sundae consist of onions and some other crap that wouldn't be included in a sundae?
@869,780 (K)
I remember that episode now. Didn't the sundae consist of onions and some other crap that wouldn't be included in a sundae?