Topic: I've never been paid so much to do so little and have everyone be so impressed.
Anonymous A started this discussion 10 years ago #53,962
I've been fucking about all week drawing pictures on my computer for $85/hr. I show up late and leave early acting rushed claiming that my time is valuable because of other clients and that I'm working after hours to meet deadlines and I only invoiced them $3200 this week and this is hardly worth my time, what an inconvenience lol!
I set the alarm on my phone to sound like a ring tone and I take these srs bsns calls about pretendy up and coming projects in private, leaving the room... I then walk back in demanding to know more about "workable time frames" and blowing their future projects off as "carrots on a stick" If you can't guarantee times, places and dates I'm done here, frivolous shit etc... They look genuinely worried that I'll leave instead of being genuinely worried that I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing.
It all seems to be working, everyone's pleased I'm still here but I was unemployed with fuck all prospects just before this came along. Any income is grate income right now because I have a mortgage and tax bill looming.
My last job paid $28/hr which is easy living and good earnings really. I'm not sure how long I can keep this up but it turns out being vague because I'm making shit up, is considered being business savvy and protecting client IP and confidentiality with delicate dismissals and that is some sort of worthy attribute. It's like they are pleased they are being lied to because that means I will lie about them to others, idk. Everything is fucked up right now but I can't tell you why and that is a good thing because you should know less about it anyway... They tthink wow, check out this guy he's really good at not knowing stuff "wink"
They think I work late into the night and am shattered in the morning but really it's just a hangover. I'm drunk right now, hopefully much of this made sense. Thanks
I set the alarm on my phone to sound like a ring tone and I take these srs bsns calls about pretendy up and coming projects in private, leaving the room... I then walk back in demanding to know more about "workable time frames" and blowing their future projects off as "carrots on a stick" If you can't guarantee times, places and dates I'm done here, frivolous shit etc... They look genuinely worried that I'll leave instead of being genuinely worried that I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing.
It all seems to be working, everyone's pleased I'm still here but I was unemployed with fuck all prospects just before this came along. Any income is grate income right now because I have a mortgage and tax bill looming.
My last job paid $28/hr which is easy living and good earnings really. I'm not sure how long I can keep this up but it turns out being vague because I'm making shit up, is considered being business savvy and protecting client IP and confidentiality with delicate dismissals and that is some sort of worthy attribute. It's like they are pleased they are being lied to because that means I will lie about them to others, idk. Everything is fucked up right now but I can't tell you why and that is a good thing because you should know less about it anyway... They tthink wow, check out this guy he's really good at not knowing stuff "wink"
They think I work late into the night and am shattered in the morning but really it's just a hangover. I'm drunk right now, hopefully much of this made sense. Thanks
Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 10 years ago, 2 minutes later[^] [v] #702,470
Hi, Becky.
DasSheeple joined in and replied with this 10 years ago, 14 minutes later, 16 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #702,472
Hack el planeto!
D-g !jJEom8Ii3E joined in and replied with this 10 years ago, 1 hour later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #702,483
Give op a medal
Anonymous E joined in and replied with this 10 years ago, 8 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #702,484
And I had expected this to be syntax shtick.
Sophie !MLHqI35Srs joined in and replied with this 10 years ago, 4 hours later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #702,531
> corporate world is full of personality-disordered subhumans
What's new?
What's new?
D-g !jJEom8Ii3E replied with this 10 years ago, 1 minute later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #702,532
bhutto joined in and replied with this 10 years ago, 30 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #702,541
if youre white you dont need to be good at anything in particular have fun being mediocre and getting rewarded for it!!
Fake anon✡ !ZkUt8arUCU joined in and replied with this 10 years ago, 3 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #702,542
[^_^] !IOdbnXsKDk joined in and replied with this 10 years ago, 22 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #702,545
[^_^] !IOdbnXsKDk double-posted this 10 years ago, 1 minute later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #702,547
@op
I hope this is real life, and I hope you don't pull Jason Bateman. I still believe there is a you beyond your face and its pretty ok lol.
I wish I was that good of an acting individual
I hope this is real life, and I hope you don't pull Jason Bateman. I still believe there is a you beyond your face and its pretty ok lol.
I wish I was that good of an acting individual
Anonymous J joined in and replied with this 10 years ago, 2 hours later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #702,583
Umm... isn't this fraud? Is OP about to get a prison sentence?
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 10 years ago, 5 minutes later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #702,584
@previous (J)
It's not fraud. I'm making $85/hr browsing minichan and reddit while Ideal with my hangover do important research stuff.
It's not fraud. I'm making $85/hr browsing minichan and reddit while I
Reid joined in and replied with this 10 years ago, 26 minutes later, 10 hours after the original post[^] [v] #702,588
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 10 years ago, 32 minutes later, 10 hours after the original post[^] [v] #702,591
I've just taken another pretend phone call, and hinted that someone is making me a very tempting offer. Boy are these guys lucky I'm still here.Pic related. It's CFD flow through pipes in SolidWorks. I know next to nothing about this other than some buzzwords and from watching youtube vids the other day on how to do it, thanks Google.
These guys love it because it gives them pictures to put in their reports, and they can talk about having an expert engineering expert working on stuff