Topic: How soon is too soon to move in together?
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM started this discussion 11 years ago #47,914
I don't really give a shit. It's happening asap. Hopefully by Christmas. In other news my new girlfriend is 10 years younger than my ex, and happens to be best friends with my ex's niece. I'm also going to get to literal baby making asap. Will this all end well for me? Hit me with your thoughts.
Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 16 minutes later[^] [v] #627,049
Seems a little fast. Don't you already have some kids?
Anonymous C joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 14 minutes later, 30 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #627,052
Seems a little slow. What were you waiting for?
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 24 minutes later, 55 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #627,055
@627,049 (B)
3 kids currently. I'd like to have maybe 5 total.
@previous (C)
I appreciate your support. I'm waiting for Friday.
3 kids currently. I'd like to have maybe 5 total.
@previous (C)
I appreciate your support. I'm waiting for Friday.
Fedoraman !FeDoRAqAy6 joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 2 hours later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,071
One date, and you are getting married? Bad idea.
Anonymous E joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 3 hours later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,098
beckyderp !4aMoRa.T2Q joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 9 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,102
You're a dumbass, dude.
Anon C is right, that came out mean. I'm sorry Ks!
Anon C is right, that came out mean. I'm sorry Ks!
(Edited 21 minutes later.)
Anonymous G joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 4 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,105
Anonymous C replied with this 11 years ago, 16 seconds later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,106
beckyderp !4aMoRa.T2Q replied with this 11 years ago, 11 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,108
Anonymous C replied with this 11 years ago, 6 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,111
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 35 minutes later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,122
Slow it down bud.
Anonymous I joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 52 minutes later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,125
@627,071 (Fedoraman !FeDoRAqAy6)
At least he gets dates and doesn't have to make up a fake date.... Unlike you.
At least he gets dates and doesn't have to make up a fake date.... Unlike you.
Sheila LaBoof joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 56 minutes later, 10 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,142
Anonymous K joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 43 minutes later, 10 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,148
I'm not sure, but I am sure that this is too soon.
Anonymous L joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 1 hour later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,169
@OP
Have you even tried her cooking yet?
Have you even tried her cooking yet?
Anonymous M joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 2 minutes later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,170
2 fast 2 furious
What if your kids don't even like her or she sucks later or she thinks u suck way too fast
What if your kids don't even like her or she sucks later or she thinks u suck way too fast
Anonymous N joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 2 hours later, 15 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,277
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 5 hours later, 20 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,324
@627,102 (beckyderp !4aMoRa.T2Q)
I know, and I just can't help it.
@627,105 (G)
Haha, yes. No joke or lie.
@627,122 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
January is coming soon.
@everyone
I met her through OKCupid. We were each other's highest match (96%). She'd been on the site for about a year and been on a lot of disappointing dates. I was on the site for about 8 months and never contacted anyone. She had looked at my profile like 10 times over the months and finally decided to contact me first. It was sparks from the start, literally like we'd already been together for a decade or something. In the following month things only got deeper. Due to my schedule I couldn't really take her out until after we'd been talking with each other every free moment for a month. By the time we had our date there was already so much chemistry it could only be described as love at first sight. I've been in long terms, I've been married, I've never experienced anything remotely like this. I seriously don't think I ever knew what true love was, surely lust, but this is.. I don't know. Obviously compatibility plays a much bigger part than we realize. We're both completely aware of how crazy it is. What's the worst that could happen? I've been all on my own for years. I started with intention of finding a ltr, I found one and if this girl isn't the one I don't think I'll ever find her. I'll keep you all posted. :)
I know, and I just can't help it.
@627,105 (G)
Haha, yes. No joke or lie.
@627,122 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
January is coming soon.
@everyone
I met her through OKCupid. We were each other's highest match (96%). She'd been on the site for about a year and been on a lot of disappointing dates. I was on the site for about 8 months and never contacted anyone. She had looked at my profile like 10 times over the months and finally decided to contact me first. It was sparks from the start, literally like we'd already been together for a decade or something. In the following month things only got deeper. Due to my schedule I couldn't really take her out until after we'd been talking with each other every free moment for a month. By the time we had our date there was already so much chemistry it could only be described as love at first sight. I've been in long terms, I've been married, I've never experienced anything remotely like this. I seriously don't think I ever knew what true love was, surely lust, but this is.. I don't know. Obviously compatibility plays a much bigger part than we realize. We're both completely aware of how crazy it is. What's the worst that could happen? I've been all on my own for years. I started with intention of finding a ltr, I found one and if this girl isn't the one I don't think I'll ever find her. I'll keep you all posted. :)
Anonymous D replied with this 11 years ago, 3 minutes later, 20 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,325
@previous (Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM)
She will turn mean and crazy in a few months. Wait until then, and see if you can handle it, then marry her.
She will turn mean and crazy in a few months. Wait until then, and see if you can handle it, then marry her.
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 7 minutes later, 20 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,327
@previous (D)
Okay, I won't plan marriage until late summer. Fair enough.
Not all women are mean and crazy though. Wtf lol.
Okay, I won't plan marriage until late summer. Fair enough.
Not all women are mean and crazy though. Wtf lol.
(Edited 3 minutes later.)
Anonymous D replied with this 11 years ago, 7 minutes later, 20 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,329
@previous (Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM)
They all "turn" at some point. The trick is to find one whose craziness you can tolerate. Trust me, bud. They all do.
They all "turn" at some point. The trick is to find one whose craziness you can tolerate. Trust me, bud. They all do.
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 20 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,331
@previous (D)
Maybe your personal experience is based on them getting to know you and not liking what they find. I've never had any woman change too much. I'm not new to this.
Maybe your personal experience is based on them getting to know you and not liking what they find. I've never had any woman change too much. I'm not new to this.
Anonymous D replied with this 11 years ago, 55 seconds later, 20 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,332
@previous (Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM)
They all "turn" at some point. Like I said, find one whose insanity you can take, and marry that one.
They all "turn" at some point. Like I said, find one whose insanity you can take, and marry that one.
Anonymous O joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 5 minutes later, 20 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,337
Anonymous N replied with this 11 years ago, 2 minutes later, 20 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,338
there is a reason the phrase familiarity breeds contempt is such a well known saying
Triptych !!/xkPL9myM joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 5 minutes later, 20 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,340
@627,324 (Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM)
whoah whoah whoah
i'm happy for you and how you've found love but what makes you want to move so fast? Will your love be less valid if you wait longer to be married?
I know you love her but it's not just you you're deciding for, it's your kids too. It won't hurt to wait it out, bud. I'm saying this as someone whose father (divorced of 13 years) felt the need to take me and my brother on an international trip to tell us he miiiight wanna date again
whoah whoah whoah
i'm happy for you and how you've found love but what makes you want to move so fast? Will your love be less valid if you wait longer to be married?
I know you love her but it's not just you you're deciding for, it's your kids too. It won't hurt to wait it out, bud. I'm saying this as someone whose father (divorced of 13 years) felt the need to take me and my brother on an international trip to tell us he miiiight wanna date again
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 4 minutes later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,341
@previous (Triptych !!/xkPL9myM)
Okay, I will wait 1 year for marriage. Is that reasonable? I talked to my kids before I even made the account and they were all on board. Apparently they had discussed me getting them a stepmom all on their own. They were basically like yes, we want a stepmom, wtf have you been waiting on.
Okay, I will wait 1 year for marriage. Is that reasonable? I talked to my kids before I even made the account and they were all on board. Apparently they had discussed me getting them a stepmom all on their own. They were basically like yes, we want a stepmom, wtf have you been waiting on.
squeegee joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 5 minutes later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,343
i dunno that anyone here is really qualified to give you really good marriage advise, pretty sure most folks here aren't in successful long term relationships of many years upon which to draw from experience. my parents dated for 3 months and got married. they've been together for 30 years now and show no signs of any kind of marital problem. but my uncle who dates for years has been married 3 times and is currently divorced. so who the fuck knows what "perfect timing" is.
if you're looking for advice though i'd suggest finding people who've been married for decades and haven't had a bunch of divorces and see what they say. also with such a life changing decision it wouldn't hurt to ask the clergy of whatever denomination you are/were brought up in. even if you're not a religious type most clergy deal with marital problems and will have very, very good advice for you when it comes to marriage.
i'd say date for a while before moving in and move in for a while before proposing, and then be engaged for a while before getting married. like 2 years into the relationship is long enough to know if you're making a mistake, but sooner than that and it can be a lot more difficult to tell. at least in my experience. but after 2 years you're either still together or absolutely broken up. but man, the "6 month relationship" is just barely long enough to even get to know them. in my experience.
but, anyway, don't take my advice, i'm not married and don't have kids and don't know much about relationships beyond year 2 relationships. so i can't say i'm doing it right
if you're looking for advice though i'd suggest finding people who've been married for decades and haven't had a bunch of divorces and see what they say. also with such a life changing decision it wouldn't hurt to ask the clergy of whatever denomination you are/were brought up in. even if you're not a religious type most clergy deal with marital problems and will have very, very good advice for you when it comes to marriage.
i'd say date for a while before moving in and move in for a while before proposing, and then be engaged for a while before getting married. like 2 years into the relationship is long enough to know if you're making a mistake, but sooner than that and it can be a lot more difficult to tell. at least in my experience. but after 2 years you're either still together or absolutely broken up. but man, the "6 month relationship" is just barely long enough to even get to know them. in my experience.
but, anyway, don't take my advice, i'm not married and don't have kids and don't know much about relationships beyond year 2 relationships. so i can't say i'm doing it right
(Edited 1 minute later.)
Anonymous N replied with this 11 years ago, 3 minutes later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,344
@627,341 (Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM)
probably the biggest reason for the majority of early divorces is that people got married before their relationship was shown to be more than just each other getting aroused by the other's presence and mindless flirting.
probably the biggest reason for the majority of early divorces is that people got married before their relationship was shown to be more than just each other getting aroused by the other's presence and mindless flirting.
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 3 seconds later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,345
@627,343 (squeegee)
Did your parents get married because of a pregnancy, waiting for sex, or just "totally in love can't wait" type thing?
Did your parents get married because of a pregnancy, waiting for sex, or just "totally in love can't wait" type thing?
squeegee replied with this 11 years ago, 5 minutes later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,347
@previous (Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM)
they say they just knew. wasn't pregnancy. might've been waiting for sex, but they were both a little older and i think just ready to settle down i guess. i'm sure they weren't each others firsts, so i doubt that it was for sex. they just knew, so after 3 months my dad proposed and they were married 3 months later. that's the story anyway
they say they just knew. wasn't pregnancy. might've been waiting for sex, but they were both a little older and i think just ready to settle down i guess. i'm sure they weren't each others firsts, so i doubt that it was for sex. they just knew, so after 3 months my dad proposed and they were married 3 months later. that's the story anyway
(Edited 28 seconds later.)
Anonymous N replied with this 11 years ago, 5 minutes later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,350
@previous (squeegee)
Cause parents always tell their kids every freaky thing or activities they were involved in.
Cause parents always tell their kids every freaky thing or activities they were involved in.
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 3 minutes later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,351
@627,344 (N)
That's a pretty good description of my first marriage. This time the attraction was completely was mental until we met. Ofc we had exchanged pics, but nothing prepared me for how gorgeous she really is.
That's a pretty good description of my first marriage. This time the attraction was completely was mental until we met. Ofc we had exchanged pics, but nothing prepared me for how gorgeous she really is.
Anonymous R joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 23 seconds later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,352
where do you live in kansas so i can come find you and kick your ass
Anonymous N replied with this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,353
squeegee replied with this 11 years ago, 2 minutes later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,355
@627,350 (N)
that's why i said, "that's the story anyway." but i do know my mom was a hippie and my dad was divorced so they'd both already fucked plenty of people and my oldest brother was born their 2nd year of marriage, so, i doubt it was for sex and it wasn't because of pregnancy. they say they just knew and got married very quickly. maybe that's just the story they tell, or maybe they just knew it'd work out and got hitch really quickly.
that's why i said, "that's the story anyway." but i do know my mom was a hippie and my dad was divorced so they'd both already fucked plenty of people and my oldest brother was born their 2nd year of marriage, so, i doubt it was for sex and it wasn't because of pregnancy. they say they just knew and got married very quickly. maybe that's just the story they tell, or maybe they just knew it'd work out and got hitch really quickly.
(Edited 1 minute later.)
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 16 minutes later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,356
@627,347 (squeegee)
I believe them because that's what I'm experiencing. I just know. I'm not naive, desperate, crazy or any of that. She feels the same. We both kinda of just felt it right from the start, a perfect click. She has a decent job, a place, is intelligent, super kind, does volunteer work regularly, seems really stable and has many long term friendships. We were both looking to settle down, she just hadn't met anyone that had been more than just "well he's alright" to her. I wasn't all that interested in any of my "matches", and never really even tried. I can't really put it into words, it's just like "welp, this is it".
Your parent's experience makes me feel a lot better, like I'm not totally being an idiot. Logically I know it seems that way, though.
I believe them because that's what I'm experiencing. I just know. I'm not naive, desperate, crazy or any of that. She feels the same. We both kinda of just felt it right from the start, a perfect click. She has a decent job, a place, is intelligent, super kind, does volunteer work regularly, seems really stable and has many long term friendships. We were both looking to settle down, she just hadn't met anyone that had been more than just "well he's alright" to her. I wasn't all that interested in any of my "matches", and never really even tried. I can't really put it into words, it's just like "welp, this is it".
Your parent's experience makes me feel a lot better, like I'm not totally being an idiot. Logically I know it seems that way, though.
(Edited 2 minutes later.)
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM (OP) double-posted this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,357
squeegee replied with this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,358
@627,356 (Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM)
oh yeah, and they'll never get divorced either. they're still as happy as ever. not that they never had hard times, but they always worked it out. they just work well together. i wish you the best, bud.
oh yeah, and they'll never get divorced either. they're still as happy as ever. not that they never had hard times, but they always worked it out. they just work well together. i wish you the best, bud.
postmortem !!Qe8ScDbX+ joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 14 minutes later, 22 hours after the original post[^] [v] #627,366
Ive already trademarked this schtick bud. Fuck off
Anonymous D replied with this 11 years ago, 3 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #627,402
You are making a stupid mistake.
Anonymous C replied with this 11 years ago, 21 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #627,410
Green joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 1 hour later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #627,421
> okcupid
Anonymous C replied with this 11 years ago, 23 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #627,424
Anonymous L replied with this 11 years ago, 5 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #627,425
Green replied with this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #627,426
Anonymous C replied with this 11 years ago, 2 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #627,427
@previous (Green)
You could try Minichan's in-house dating service. I hear it's not bad.
@627,425 (L)
Can you elaborate?
You could try Minichan's in-house dating service. I hear it's not bad.
@627,425 (L)
Can you elaborate?
Triptych !!/xkPL9myM replied with this 11 years ago, 3 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #627,459
Anonymous E replied with this 11 years ago, 12 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #627,461
Anonymous U joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 6 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #627,462
@OP
How big is her penis?
How big is her penis?
WSD !m2cp3rR5zw joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 1 hour later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #627,466
Take it slower, man. Plan shit out, be best friends, do whatever before moving in together.
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 6 days later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #628,988
Hopefully next weekend isn't too soon because that's when it's happening.
|βʒ| Meowth joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 53 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #628,992
@previous (Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM)
Fuck what everybody says. If that's what feels right, then do it. If it doesn't work out, you'll find a way to deal with it.
Fuck what everybody says. If that's what feels right, then do it. If it doesn't work out, you'll find a way to deal with it.
Lovelyfe !KansasxqvM (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 6 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #628,996
|βʒ| Meowth replied with this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #628,997
Lawrence joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 1 day later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #629,343
Damn dude, are you sure you aren't a U-Haul lesbian? :P
Good luck regardless, man. Hope it works out. :)
Good luck regardless, man. Hope it works out. :)
Anonymous L replied with this 11 years ago, 26 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #629,349
@627,427 (C)
It's like a loyalty card, but for sex and relationships. Didn't you get one when you joined?
It's like a loyalty card, but for sex and relationships. Didn't you get one when you joined?
Anonymous Z-2 joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 1 day later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #629,722
Is it too late to make light of Ks's struggle with substance abuse? Or the long list of pharmacies he can no longer purchase sudafed from?
Anonymous Z-2 double-posted this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #629,723
Anonymous Z-2 triple-posted this 11 years ago, 50 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #629,725
Anonymous Z-3 joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 3 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #629,767
shits gonna be crash