Topic: WWTFD? A soccer mom drives over your grass...
beckyderp !4aMoRa.T2Q started this discussion 11 years ago #45,489
OK so this soccer mom came to the office, apparently running late and not sure where to go, and asked how to find another office down the road. So I looked it up and told her where to go.
THEN she says, oh that is just a few offices down, can I drive over your grass to get to the next parking lot?
And I said uh no, please don't.
She said no really, I have an SUV, it's made to go over grass.
I said are you serious? I mean maybe she is kidding?
She said yes, it won't hurt your grass.
I repeated no don't do that.
So she goes and gets in her SUV and merrily drives it over the grass, into the next parking lot, then over THEIR grass, and into the parking lot after that.
I got her license plate and called the police. The police went and talked to her and she apologized to them for doing that. I have her information.
MY QUESTION: should I rain down vengeance on this soccer mom? Thanks.
THEN she says, oh that is just a few offices down, can I drive over your grass to get to the next parking lot?
And I said uh no, please don't.
She said no really, I have an SUV, it's made to go over grass.
I said are you serious? I mean maybe she is kidding?
She said yes, it won't hurt your grass.
I repeated no don't do that.
So she goes and gets in her SUV and merrily drives it over the grass, into the next parking lot, then over THEIR grass, and into the parking lot after that.
I got her license plate and called the police. The police went and talked to her and she apologized to them for doing that. I have her information.
MY QUESTION: should I rain down vengeance on this soccer mom? Thanks.
| Poll option | Votes | Percentage | Graph |
|---|---|---|---|
| Forgive and forget. | 1 | 6% | |
| Make her write an apology letter to the grass (r04r's idea). | 7 | 39% | |
| Ask the police to cite her. | 1 | 6% | |
| Sue the broad. | 7 | 39% | |
| Other (please explain). | 2 | 11% |
Doctor Dick !DEePerQmUQ joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 2 minutes later[^] [v] #600,103
Sue her for trespass and destruction of property. Not for the reward, but for the vengeance.
Killer Lettuce?? !!iNo3FkiZx joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 3 minutes later, 5 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #600,104
oh god. A genuine, full-blown idiot.
I am not sure you can actually do anything to her, but I think you need to try your hardest anyway. So I am voting for every option (except the first one).
I am not sure you can actually do anything to her, but I think you need to try your hardest anyway. So I am voting for every option (except the first one).
Anonymous D joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 48 seconds later, 6 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #600,105
@OP
Report her to CPS.
Report her to CPS.
dw joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 30 seconds later, 6 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #600,107
what would tina fey do??
Syntax joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 4 minutes later, 11 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #600,108
Voted for OtherYou have her information. Do a quick search of web and see if there is any way you can embarrass her.
@previous (dw)
Yea wot wood Tina Fey do?
FuckAlms !vX8K53rFBI joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 4 hours later, 4 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,132
> no really, I have an SUV, it's made to go over grass.
a wagon is made to go over grass. an suv is made to guzzle lots of gas and make soccer moms feel like their kids have potential.
a wagon is made to go over grass. an suv is made to guzzle lots of gas and make soccer moms feel like their kids have potential.
Methlyfe !KansasxqvM joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 46 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,142
Anything you might do could have repercussions. Hopefully karma will catch up to the entitled bitch at some point in her life. But don't let her shit poison your well, let it go.
(Edited 22 seconds later.)
Anonymous I joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 15 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,149
Methlyfe !KansasxqvM replied with this 11 years ago, 11 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,155
Anonymous I replied with this 11 years ago, 46 seconds later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,157
Methlyfe !KansasxqvM replied with this 11 years ago, 4 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,160
@previous (I)
That would depend entirely on what sort of revenge tactics were used. Any trouble at all over some entitled soccer mom seems like too much to me though.
That would depend entirely on what sort of revenge tactics were used. Any trouble at all over some entitled soccer mom seems like too much to me though.
squeegee joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 5 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,164
how the fuck can people get lost these days? i guarantee she's got a fucking smart phone and probably has god damned OnStar GPS in her fucking SUV.
walking in to a random place of work and asking directions? the fuck is this, the 1900's? jesus fuck.
it's like people have never even heard of google.
not only is it incredibly easy to use google maps but it's infinitely better than having someone go, "uhm, so, it's up the street. you need to go up past, uh, i forgot the road but there's a Denny's there, and uh, take a right at the Denny's and go on down till you get to a stop. Pretty sure you go right, it's in one of the corners of the intersection, maybe the NW corner? but yeah, it's just up the road. can't miss it." <-- read in a moron's voice, btw
walking in to a random place of work and asking directions? the fuck is this, the 1900's? jesus fuck.
it's like people have never even heard of google.
not only is it incredibly easy to use google maps but it's infinitely better than having someone go, "uhm, so, it's up the street. you need to go up past, uh, i forgot the road but there's a Denny's there, and uh, take a right at the Denny's and go on down till you get to a stop. Pretty sure you go right, it's in one of the corners of the intersection, maybe the NW corner? but yeah, it's just up the road. can't miss it." <-- read in a moron's voice, btw
(Edited 1 minute later.)
Anonymous I replied with this 11 years ago, 3 seconds later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,165
@600,160 (Methlyfe !KansasxqvM)
ok what if
> Make her write an apology letter to the grass (r04r's idea).
was done (in the form of an angry lawyer letter threatening to sue)
and what about
> Sue the broad.
ok what if
> Make her write an apology letter to the grass (r04r's idea).
was done (in the form of an angry lawyer letter threatening to sue)
and what about
> Sue the broad.
Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx replied with this 11 years ago, 8 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,177
OP- I have a solution. It's a long-con, but it'll pay off.
To start with, keep on being a lawyer for a while, about two or three years. Try to set aside lots of money, really build up a respectable pile.
Once you have plentiful cash, quit being a lawyer. Now you need to take a job in construction or mining. Either one, will work. Use your money pile to get any necessary qualifications and training, either with bribes or actual learning. It doesn't matter.
Then go apply for a job. If they try to turn you away because you're a woman, just threaten to sue them for exclusion and force yourself into their labour team.
Next, you need to position yourself so you get to drive a haul truck. You know, one of those massive trucks that they use to haul around boulders. If you meet any resistance, just threaten to sue again until you have control of a haul truck.
You'll now be closing in on revenge. What you need to do now is find out where this woman lives, and when she's home. Temporarily take up stalking, but don't let it turn into a hobby. This is purely business.
Once you have her location, drive the haul truck over to her house. All dressed in your worker uniform so you look authentic. Knock on her door, claim you have a job nearby and ask if you can drive over her SUV to get to it.
She'll be outraged and refuse. Now, you need to laugh maniacally, and mockingly assure her that your haul truck is "made to go over SUVs". Then run to the haul truck, and merrily drive over the SUV.
I suppose you could also fuck up her grass while you're there, but you seemed to be sad about the original grass casualties, so you may not be looking for any more grass deaths. It's up to you.
To start with, keep on being a lawyer for a while, about two or three years. Try to set aside lots of money, really build up a respectable pile.
Once you have plentiful cash, quit being a lawyer. Now you need to take a job in construction or mining. Either one, will work. Use your money pile to get any necessary qualifications and training, either with bribes or actual learning. It doesn't matter.
Then go apply for a job. If they try to turn you away because you're a woman, just threaten to sue them for exclusion and force yourself into their labour team.
Next, you need to position yourself so you get to drive a haul truck. You know, one of those massive trucks that they use to haul around boulders. If you meet any resistance, just threaten to sue again until you have control of a haul truck.
You'll now be closing in on revenge. What you need to do now is find out where this woman lives, and when she's home. Temporarily take up stalking, but don't let it turn into a hobby. This is purely business.
Once you have her location, drive the haul truck over to her house. All dressed in your worker uniform so you look authentic. Knock on her door, claim you have a job nearby and ask if you can drive over her SUV to get to it.
She'll be outraged and refuse. Now, you need to laugh maniacally, and mockingly assure her that your haul truck is "made to go over SUVs". Then run to the haul truck, and merrily drive over the SUV.
I suppose you could also fuck up her grass while you're there, but you seemed to be sad about the original grass casualties, so you may not be looking for any more grass deaths. It's up to you.
Anonymous I replied with this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,181
@previous (Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx)
how about you just skip most of that and just key the suv during the night
how about you just skip most of that and just key the suv during the night
kook !!Phkn/3Gic joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 8 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,191
Methlyfe !KansasxqvM replied with this 11 years ago, 40 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,220
@600,165 (I)
I like the apology to the grass idea. It's harmless and hilarious. I've done some petty revenge in my time, it does feel good.
When I was a teenager my radio started smoking so I quickly pulled into the first place I could which happened to be a driveway, as I'm sitting there yanking the fuse and making sure the problem is solved the guy who lived came out and knocked on my window. I thought he was gonna ask if we needed help or something, but instead this old price is like gtfo off my property immediately, you mother fuckers. So we yell obscenities at the asshole and burn out. We had to drive by that house every time we went to the place we all hung out (which was often), on our way back by my buddy Billy throws his soda bottle onto the prick's lawn. And so it begins. Every time we'd drive by the guy's house we'd gather all the trash we could and throw onto the lawn. It got to the point where we were saving trash just to decorate this guy's perfectly kept lawn. This went on for at least 3 years, lol.
I like the apology to the grass idea. It's harmless and hilarious. I've done some petty revenge in my time, it does feel good.
When I was a teenager my radio started smoking so I quickly pulled into the first place I could which happened to be a driveway, as I'm sitting there yanking the fuse and making sure the problem is solved the guy who lived came out and knocked on my window. I thought he was gonna ask if we needed help or something, but instead this old price is like gtfo off my property immediately, you mother fuckers. So we yell obscenities at the asshole and burn out. We had to drive by that house every time we went to the place we all hung out (which was often), on our way back by my buddy Billy throws his soda bottle onto the prick's lawn. And so it begins. Every time we'd drive by the guy's house we'd gather all the trash we could and throw onto the lawn. It got to the point where we were saving trash just to decorate this guy's perfectly kept lawn. This went on for at least 3 years, lol.
(Edited 38 seconds later.)
Metæ joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 2 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,221
@OP
Did it cause any damage?
Did it cause any damage?
Anonymous M joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 3 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,223
@OP
You could just shrug your shoulders and forget about it, the same way most rational adults would.
You could just shrug your shoulders and forget about it, the same way most rational adults would.
Metæ replied with this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,224
@OP
Also tell her to trade it in for an Audi A3: the all wheel drive will get her across anything.
Also tell her to trade it in for an Audi A3: the all wheel drive will get her across anything.
Anonymous D replied with this 11 years ago, 51 minutes later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,227
Anonymous N joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 53 minutes later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,239
@600,220 (Methlyfe !KansasxqvM)
3 years sounds a little excessive. So this karma thing, how does it work?
3 years sounds a little excessive. So this karma thing, how does it work?
Anonymous O joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 1 hour later, 10 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,247
"mind if I park my prick on your ass?" Ever since, I been the champ
Methlyfe !KansasxqvM replied with this 11 years ago, 27 minutes later, 11 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,255
@600,239 (N)
Don't fuck with teenagers! I don't believe in karma like some magical thing, but for the most part shitty people don't usually have the best lives or relationships.
Don't fuck with teenagers! I don't believe in karma like some magical thing, but for the most part shitty people don't usually have the best lives or relationships.
hater !JGlOo5d1iU joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 12 minutes later, 11 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,258
You called the cops cause she drove on some businesses lawns? You were willing to escalate to the threat of physical violence and death over something that literally does not matter. Next time, key her car like an adult.
(Edited 23 seconds later.)
squeegee replied with this 11 years ago, 22 minutes later, 11 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,268
who owns the property? And was there damage to the lawn? If there are tread marks or if it's fucked up, call the property manager/owners and let them have the plate number and all the info. Let them decide if they want to mess with it. If they want to mess with it they'll send out a grounds crew to fix it up and then may go after her for damages. or have her cited for vandalism or something? that's what i'd do. she may end up with a couple hundred dollar invoice in her mailbox.
FuckAlms !vX8K53rFBI replied with this 11 years ago, 1 hour later, 13 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,284
@600,177 (Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx)
This... this is glorious.
@600,258 (hater !JGlOo5d1iU)
People who key cars should be shot repeatedly with a bb gun until they bleed out.
This... this is glorious.
@600,258 (hater !JGlOo5d1iU)
People who key cars should be shot repeatedly with a bb gun until they bleed out.
beckyderp !4aMoRa.T2Q (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 3 hours later, 16 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,307
@600,221 (Metæ)
There are tire treads on the grass, looks like it will take a bit to grow back but it's not bad.
@600,258 (hater !JGlOo5d1iU)
Entitled people do retarded shit like this because they get away with it. She's a white soccer mom, the police didn't even cite her, she's not going to get shot.
@600,268 (squeegee)
It's not bad. For trespass, one can sue for punitive damages beyond the cost of repairs, so as to discourage people from doing shit like this. I don't think anyone's going to follow up on it. Except maybe to write a letter. I should write a letter citing the laws that she broke and what we could sue for. I don't actually want any money though, I don't think. (The police gave me her address.)
There are tire treads on the grass, looks like it will take a bit to grow back but it's not bad.
@600,258 (hater !JGlOo5d1iU)
Entitled people do retarded shit like this because they get away with it. She's a white soccer mom, the police didn't even cite her, she's not going to get shot.
@600,268 (squeegee)
It's not bad. For trespass, one can sue for punitive damages beyond the cost of repairs, so as to discourage people from doing shit like this. I don't think anyone's going to follow up on it. Except maybe to write a letter. I should write a letter citing the laws that she broke and what we could sue for. I don't actually want any money though, I don't think. (The police gave me her address.)
FuckAlms !vX8K53rFBI replied with this 11 years ago, 3 hours later, 20 hours after the original post[^] [v] #600,339
r04r replied with this 11 years ago, 5 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #600,440
beckyderp !4aMoRa.T2Q (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 1 week later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #603,658
Update: I let it go, am not going to do anything else. The grass's feelings are still hurt but it's okay.
Anonymous Q joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 40 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #603,672
@600,177 (Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx)
damlol
@600,220 (Methlyfe !KansasxqvM)
fucking lol good show
@previous (beckyderp !4aMoRa.T2Q)
but… but…
damlol
@600,220 (Methlyfe !KansasxqvM)
fucking lol good show
@previous (beckyderp !4aMoRa.T2Q)
but… but…
Anonymous R joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #603,725
@603,658 (beckyderp !4aMoRa.T2Q)
It would have been funny if she ran over a lawn sprinkler and popped a tire. Do you think she would have had the sheer gall to ask you guys to pay for it?
It would have been funny if she ran over a lawn sprinkler and popped a tire. Do you think she would have had the sheer gall to ask you guys to pay for it?
Anonymous B replied with this 11 years ago, 3 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #603,865
Becku I think you should embed nails into the grass
