Topic: I have trouble getting hard with real sex
Anonymous A started this discussion 11 years ago #43,759
My gf wants to have sex and we agreed for it to go down tomorrow. I've been putting it off for a while and she's getting anxious, so I know it's time. I also know that she can't get me hard because of previous relationships where I couldn't and it was quite embarrassing. I need a way to get hard without her noticing that she can't get me hard. I was thinking about getting a boner at home from watching porn, putting it in water, and when it gets hard just freeze it until I get to her place. I'm not quite sure how I would freeze or unfreeze it yet. I need more tips, really. Thanks in advance.
Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 5 minutes later[^] [v] #577,967
The girls of minichan have penis pumps on hand for their gentleman suitors who can't get it up for them. It's a common problem
Metæ joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 7 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #577,969
Pack a strapon on your pants, and turn out the lights just before sex (it's romantic) and then put it in. Say things like "oh yes oh yes hhhhnnngggg" (watch some pornos for inspiration) and then after 8-10 minutes (use a watch with glow in the dark hands to time it) do like a body spasm then freeze up for a second and pull out. Discreetly discard the strapon and cuddle.
(Edited 30 seconds later.)
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 7 minutes later, 14 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #577,970
@577,967 (B)
If she jerks me off, it's still not gonna work unless porn is involved and she doesn't even have WiFi.
@previous (Metæ)
That would be perfect but I don't own a strap on dildo or a watch with glow in the dark hands. I'm also low on cash and have just little time to get this done.
If she jerks me off, it's still not gonna work unless porn is involved and she doesn't even have WiFi.
@previous (Metæ)
That would be perfect but I don't own a strap on dildo or a watch with glow in the dark hands. I'm also low on cash and have just little time to get this done.
Anonymous D joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 15 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #577,971
I can understand. Vaginae are gross after all, and you can see the anus too. I find it easier to masturbate to be frank.
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 17 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #577,973
You could ask her if she wants to set the mood by letting you put on a porno or something like that. Alternatively you could ram a metal stick down your urethra and force it to be hard.
Alternatively since she is your gf you could just...tell her and see if you two can figure out a solution together.
Alternatively since she is your gf you could just...tell her and see if you two can figure out a solution together.
(Edited 1 minute later.)
kook !!mCVqftDha joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 3 minutes later, 21 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #577,974
Get it hard then use a cockring
Metæ replied with this 11 years ago, 5 minutes later, 27 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #577,977
@577,970 (A)
> If she jerks me off, it's still not gonna work unless porn is involved and she doesn't even have WiFi.
>
> That would be perfect but I don't own a strap on dildo or a watch with glow in the dark hands. I'm also low on cash and have just little time to get this done.
Well buy one you mora. I mean, you can buy a glow in the dark watch for $5 at Walmart and I haven't priced strapons recently but it should be under $30 total. Just hit Walmart and your local sex shop/adult bookstore/novelty store/whatever they call it where you live on the way to your gf's.
> If she jerks me off, it's still not gonna work unless porn is involved and she doesn't even have WiFi.
>
> That would be perfect but I don't own a strap on dildo or a watch with glow in the dark hands. I'm also low on cash and have just little time to get this done.
Well buy one you mora. I mean, you can buy a glow in the dark watch for $5 at Walmart and I haven't priced strapons recently but it should be under $30 total. Just hit Walmart and your local sex shop/adult bookstore/novelty store/whatever they call it where you live on the way to your gf's.
Anonymous B replied with this 11 years ago, 1 hour later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #577,983
FuckAlms !vX8K53rFBI joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 50 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #577,987
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 7 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #577,989
@577,974 (kook !!mCVqftDha)
If only I knew where to find one, that might work.
I think I'm just going to come straight with her.
If only I knew where to find one, that might work.
I think I'm just going to come straight with her.
Green !BEERiVqJJw joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 9 minutes later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #577,990
RWBY Rhubarb !!iNo3FkiZx joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 39 minutes later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #577,995
Anonymous J joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 2 hours later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #578,013
@OP has not had many vaginas.Lemon Drop !CITRUS3QCY replied with this 11 years ago, 7 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #578,019
Green !BEERiVqJJw replied with this 11 years ago, 1 hour later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #578,032
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 11 years ago, 4 minutes later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #578,035
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 13 hours later, 22 hours after the original post[^] [v] #578,145
It went great, folks. Turns out I had 4G at her house and watched porn beforehand.
Anonymous K joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 28 minutes later, 22 hours after the original post[^] [v] #578,148
Anonymous L joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 1 minute later, 22 hours after the original post[^] [v] #578,150
@578,145 (A)
But didn't she notice that she didn't get you hard when you already had a boner from watching porn?
But didn't she notice that she didn't get you hard when you already had a boner from watching porn?
Anonymous K replied with this 11 years ago, 1 hour later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #578,157
@OP what if you just be direct and tell her what you need and that you feel insecure about it so you want her to be understanding and supportive?
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 11 years ago, 12 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #578,158
@578,150 (L)
Apparently she didn't care. Besides, it wasn't a raging boner.
@previous (K)
I could have done that and wouldn't have minded doing that but just didn't want to. I definitely thought about it.
Apparently she didn't care. Besides, it wasn't a raging boner.
@previous (K)
I could have done that and wouldn't have minded doing that but just didn't want to. I definitely thought about it.
hater !JGlOo5d1iU joined in and replied with this 11 years ago, 4 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #578,210
Go to the bathroom and get yourself hard and put a rubber band around the base of your penis, then, put the condom on (which is your excuse for using the bathroom).