Minichan

Mumford and fucking Sons. Yeah, I’m getting topical up in this bitch. These fuckers have been everywhere, radio, Grammys, internet, whatever. Speaking of the Grammys, they actually got to perform with Bob Dylan. These bozos performed with BOB DYLAN, further solidifying my view that Dylan will collaborate with any motherfucker. Maybe I’m just being too obtuse, but goddamn if these shits aren’t the most overrated band on this side of Nirvana. Take their album Sigh No More for example. Twelve unbelievably bland songs deserves an 8/10 (Pop Matters, Clash, MusicOMH), +300,000 copies sold, two Grammy nominations, and Best British Album by the BRIT Awards? Give me a fucking break. It’s just a good thing the festering anal wound of a “music” magazine Rolling Stone didn’t review the album. I could see it now: “The debut album by British folk rockers breathes new air into a bland music industry with its depressingly positive messages and blah blah blah.” By the first track you know this is going to be some terrible shit. It’s like going to see a movie without any previous knowledge of it, and then you see Shia Laboeuf’s name in the opening credits. So you’re “treated” to some quaint guitar picking and, holy shit, the whole band singing in unison! That’s like some Beatles shit right there. I never actually listened to them but my history teacher told me they were the best band of all time! LOL! Too bad their voices sound like the flannel-clad suave bastard that tries so hard to be cool at the bar and ends up sleeping with all of the dumb whores who play this kind of drivel. And that afterthought of a guitar picks up later and, oh my!, the banjo joins along. How quirky and delightful and NOT FORCED. Jesus. Very rarely do lyrics make up for a terrible song, and very rarely do they make a good song terrible, but this is a case in which the lyrics make a terrible song even worse. “Man is a giddy thing”? You can quote Shakespeare? HOLY SHIT! So can the introverted, self-centered asshole you knew in high school that scribbled the exact same thing in your yearbook when you asked him to sign it out of pity. “Love it will not betray you/Dismay or enslave you, it will set you free.” Here’s a drinking game: Ask the bitch with thick-rimmed glasses, bleached blond hair, and a book on entry-level philosophy to make you a mixtape. When she comes back, trembling with excitement that somebody wants to listen to her God-awful mix of try-hard indie rockers trying to cash in on the paradoxical forced authenticity popularized by (cringe) Generation X, listen to it and take a shot every time “Love” and “set you free” are used in the same song. Down the whole fucker if Ryan Adams is on there, because you don’t want to be sober by the end of that abortion, much like how you won’t want to be conscious by the end of this song. Seriously, just botch the prefrontal lobotomy now, because that’s more fun than you’ll ever have with this album.

mumford and sons is one of my new favorite bands. eat a cock.

@previous (!OPhereejJA)
That's real fucking neato. I mean I personally don't enjoy shoving hot needles in my ears but hey to each his own.

lolhipster

@previous (F)
What a completely valid comeback

@previous (hamfist !!mtq555+/1)
lolhipster

> Taking the piss
Chav detected.

stop liking what i dont like

o hey they are with universals indie label :')