Topic: An open letter to Cupcake/Lexi from Postmortem/John
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk started this discussion 13 years ago #28,413
Okay, so there's a good chance that Lexi has blacklisted me on her phone, and doesn't even read my texts, and it's hard for me to determine what I am blocked on, and what I'm not blocked on. So, I am going to put this message to her here in hopes that she will read it at some point, there's a good chance she won't, but I hope she does, here it is:
Look, okay, I get it, you don't want to be romantically involved with me, I can accept that. We have different views, lifestyles, values, beliefs, etc. We are 2 very different people and our differences, and even some of our similarities make us largely incompatable. We tried very hard to make it work, but in the end it didn't.
However, I can't help the fact that I love you, and I can't help the fact that I want you in my life. Maybe our differences make us a bad couple, but I don't think we are so different that we can't be there for each other.
I miss you, I miss your voice, and your smile. I miss your laugh, I miss your conversation. I miss the little dance you do when you're happy, I miss just being with you.
I admire you, and I think you will go far in life with or without me. I know that you don't need me, I know that you never did.
I did a lot of horrible things throughout our relationship, and I have no excuse for them, I am truly sorry for what I put you through.
But I also know we had a lot of very good moments, and I know we made each other very happy, you certainly made me very happy.
I just want to talk to you again, I understand that you may not want to, and that saddens me, but is okay. And if that's the case then I want you to know that I will always think of you fondly, and that getting to be near you, getting to be in love with you is something that I will cherish for the rest of my life. Thank you for everything, really.
If you still have any inclination to be in my life, at all, then I do hope you will give me a call. I love you.
*Note to minichan: Yes, I realize I am opening myself up to ridicule, and yes I know I will be massively insulted in this thread, and yes I know you are all sick of this Cupcake stuff. But I just wanted to put this out there because it is important to me.
Look, okay, I get it, you don't want to be romantically involved with me, I can accept that. We have different views, lifestyles, values, beliefs, etc. We are 2 very different people and our differences, and even some of our similarities make us largely incompatable. We tried very hard to make it work, but in the end it didn't.
However, I can't help the fact that I love you, and I can't help the fact that I want you in my life. Maybe our differences make us a bad couple, but I don't think we are so different that we can't be there for each other.
I miss you, I miss your voice, and your smile. I miss your laugh, I miss your conversation. I miss the little dance you do when you're happy, I miss just being with you.
I admire you, and I think you will go far in life with or without me. I know that you don't need me, I know that you never did.
I did a lot of horrible things throughout our relationship, and I have no excuse for them, I am truly sorry for what I put you through.
But I also know we had a lot of very good moments, and I know we made each other very happy, you certainly made me very happy.
I just want to talk to you again, I understand that you may not want to, and that saddens me, but is okay. And if that's the case then I want you to know that I will always think of you fondly, and that getting to be near you, getting to be in love with you is something that I will cherish for the rest of my life. Thank you for everything, really.
If you still have any inclination to be in my life, at all, then I do hope you will give me a call. I love you.
*Note to minichan: Yes, I realize I am opening myself up to ridicule, and yes I know I will be massively insulted in this thread, and yes I know you are all sick of this Cupcake stuff. But I just wanted to put this out there because it is important to me.
HaikerensGuide !dBGi/iH4eY joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 2 minutes later[^] [v] #420,296
You ought to be more concerned with the child you killed.
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 2 minutes later, 4 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #420,298
@previous (HaikerensGuide !dBGi/iH4eY)
That was a story. This is not. I would not publicly confess to murder on minichan. I may be dumb, but I'm not that dumb.
That was a story. This is not. I would not publicly confess to murder on minichan. I may be dumb, but I'm not that dumb.
HaikerensGuide !dBGi/iH4eY replied with this 13 years ago, 2 minutes later, 6 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #420,299
@previous (Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk)
Why would you post a story like that? It may have gotten many replies on F2, but it just paints you as a sociopath. You do not want that.
Why would you post a story like that? It may have gotten many replies on F2, but it just paints you as a sociopath. You do not want that.
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 3 minutes later, 10 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #420,301
@previous (HaikerensGuide !dBGi/iH4eY)
I figured people would be smart enough to realize it was a fictional tale, and, for the most part, it seems that they were. I doubt people would make jokes if they actually thought I murdered a child last night, and was looking for advice on how to successfully get away with it.
I figured people would be smart enough to realize it was a fictional tale, and, for the most part, it seems that they were. I doubt people would make jokes if they actually thought I murdered a child last night, and was looking for advice on how to successfully get away with it.
(Edited 1 minute later.)
HaikerensGuide !dBGi/iH4eY replied with this 13 years ago, 17 minutes later, 27 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #420,304
@previous (Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk)
You actually had me going until the part where you back over him again. Otherwise it could've been a 9/10 post.
You actually had me going until the part where you back over him again. Otherwise it could've been a 9/10 post.
henn the lord of cocks joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 34 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #420,306
You're acting really creepy. She doesn't want to talk to you. Period end of story. Maybe if you stopped being such a whiney asshole and let her have her space she would still be willing to talk to you. You were your own worst enemy in getting back with her and your actions leading up to this point was all she needed to finally do what she has probably wanted to do for a while, dump you.
I know you're young or whatever but listen to my advice!
I know you're young or whatever but listen to my advice!
Sen joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 4 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #420,307
Dude, let it go. Breaking up with you, blocking you, and ignoring you are clear signs that she does not want anything to do with you.
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 8 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #420,308
@420,306 (henn the lord of cocks)
I just wanted to say one last thing, I wanted to end on something thought out rather than on just desperate pleas, and bullshit. This is the last thing I will say to her, I mean unless she responds. But this is to end my beggingfor her to return. You're right about me being my own worst enemy, and it was definitely my desperation that drove her away permanently. She was okay with me as a friend a few weeks ago, but I couldn't just accept it, and now she's gone. Lesson learned, but a lesson learned doesn't get me my friend back.
@previous (Sen)
It isn't that simple or easy.
I just wanted to say one last thing, I wanted to end on something thought out rather than on just desperate pleas, and bullshit. This is the last thing I will say to her, I mean unless she responds. But this is to end my beggingfor her to return. You're right about me being my own worst enemy, and it was definitely my desperation that drove her away permanently. She was okay with me as a friend a few weeks ago, but I couldn't just accept it, and now she's gone. Lesson learned, but a lesson learned doesn't get me my friend back.
@previous (Sen)
It isn't that simple or easy.
(Edited 4 minutes later.)
squeegee !first/o5zA joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 7 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #420,309
@previous (Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk)
"restraining orders are only valid in the USA, we were clearly in not in the USA when i contacted Mrs. Cupcake on the day she was murdered, which i had nothing to do with."
"restraining orders are only valid in the USA, we were clearly in not in the USA when i contacted Mrs. Cupcake on the day she was murdered, which i had nothing to do with."
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 7 hours later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,334
She's married with the petname I gave her. What an interesting state of affairs. I wonder what sequence of events would lead to her marrying someone else, taking a restraining order out on me, and then having her last name be "Cupcake". I suppose by pure coincidence she could marry a Mr. Cupcake. But the odds of that happeningseem slim at best.
beckyderp !8ElfFaoFao joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 3 minutes later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,335
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 11 minutes later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,338
@previous (beckyderp !8ElfFaoFao)
Your lack of tact, and abrupt forwardness I'm sure is seen as positively charming in some circles.
Your lack of tact, and abrupt forwardness I'm sure is seen as positively charming in some circles.
beckyderp !8ElfFaoFao replied with this 13 years ago, 1 minute later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,340
Anonymous G joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 4 minutes later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,342
Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 13 seconds later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,343
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 43 seconds later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,345
@420,340 (beckyderp !8ElfFaoFao)
I sent it via minichan because it is a mutual site that she, and I visit. There is a good chance that some curiosity will get the best of her, andshe will see this. Other sites require making accounts, and ones that don't have so much information on them that chances are she would never see anything I wrote, even if she did look.This site is the most convenient, and practical to serve my needs.
I sent it via minichan because it is a mutual site that she, and I visit. There is a good chance that some curiosity will get the best of her, andshe will see this. Other sites require making accounts, and ones that don't have so much information on them that chances are she would never see anything I wrote, even if she did look.This site is the most convenient, and practical to serve my needs.
squeegee joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 3 hours later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,357
@previous (Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk)
> I sent it via minichan because it is a mutual site that she, and I visit.
Because talking to her in person is out of the question, what with her not wanting to see you and all.
> There is a good chance that some curiosity will get the best of her, andshe will see this.
Probably not, she doesn't sound obsessed and isn't likely formulating ways to get back together and trying desperately to force herself back into your life.
> Other sites require making accounts, and ones that don't have so much information on them that chances are she would never see anything I wrote, even if she did look.This site is the most convenient, and practical to serve my needs.
Again, she's not obsessed and spending every minute of everyday concocting ploys to contact, send messages, and communicate with an ex who broke up with her.
Also, your self serving little messages about how much she meant to you, how you'll always treasure her friendship, and how much youd like to get back together (but are okay if she doesn't because you only want her to be happy, are about as transparent as glass.
The only thing you really mean is, "cuuuuuupcaaaaake, don't leave me! I'll say anything, please, I can't live without you! Come baaaaack!"
Which really means, "my self esteem is tied to other people's acceptance of me, and to be dumped is unacceptable. It would be better (for me) if stay together, regardless of how different we are, becuase I'd rather not have to deal with, you know, rejection.
I can't handle rejection. In fact, I refuse to.
> I sent it via minichan because it is a mutual site that she, and I visit.
Because talking to her in person is out of the question, what with her not wanting to see you and all.
> There is a good chance that some curiosity will get the best of her, andshe will see this.
Probably not, she doesn't sound obsessed and isn't likely formulating ways to get back together and trying desperately to force herself back into your life.
> Other sites require making accounts, and ones that don't have so much information on them that chances are she would never see anything I wrote, even if she did look.This site is the most convenient, and practical to serve my needs.
Again, she's not obsessed and spending every minute of everyday concocting ploys to contact, send messages, and communicate with an ex who broke up with her.
Also, your self serving little messages about how much she meant to you, how you'll always treasure her friendship, and how much youd like to get back together (but are okay if she doesn't because you only want her to be happy, are about as transparent as glass.
The only thing you really mean is, "cuuuuuupcaaaaake, don't leave me! I'll say anything, please, I can't live without you! Come baaaaack!"
Which really means, "my self esteem is tied to other people's acceptance of me, and to be dumped is unacceptable. It would be better (for me) if stay together, regardless of how different we are, becuase I'd rather not have to deal with, you know, rejection.
I can't handle rejection. In fact, I refuse to.
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 9 minutes later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,358
@previous (squeegee)
Not true at all, it actually is just important to me to end on a high not, while rejection may be somewhat bad forme, being thought ill of by somebodyI admire is a 1000 times worse.I we don't ever get back togetherI still want her to remember me, and speak of me fondly.if I really wanted to force her to get back together with me I could probably come up with some devious plot, but I really don't want to, I really do want Lexi to be happy.
Not true at all, it actually is just important to me to end on a high not, while rejection may be somewhat bad forme, being thought ill of by somebodyI admire is a 1000 times worse.I we don't ever get back togetherI still want her to remember me, and speak of me fondly.if I really wanted to force her to get back together with me I could probably come up with some devious plot, but I really don't want to, I really do want Lexi to be happy.
(Edited 6 minutes later.)
beckyderp !8ElfFaoFao replied with this 13 years ago, 1 minute later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,359
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 7 minutes later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,360
@previous (beckyderp !8ElfFaoFao)
She probably will, she's a very sweet person, and I think she has good thingsto say about me. At the very least it will be because it is more becoming to talk positively, and not negatively of others. Despite all the issues I've had with her, I only plan on speaking highly of her in the future. Not everyone is as spiteful, and obtuse as you are.
She probably will, she's a very sweet person, and I think she has good thingsto say about me. At the very least it will be because it is more becoming to talk positively, and not negatively of others. Despite all the issues I've had with her, I only plan on speaking highly of her in the future. Not everyone is as spiteful, and obtuse as you are.
Unintentional Jackass !LASXURl1b6 joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 10 minutes later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,363
So from what I gather this is Depressionman's current persona or replacement, right?
beckyderp !8ElfFaoFao replied with this 13 years ago, 1 minute later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,365
@previous (Unintentional Jackass !LASXURl1b6)
If DM were a skinny NPD cockgobbler, yes. He's certainly living up to DM's impressive track record of failure.
If DM were a skinny NPD cockgobbler, yes. He's certainly living up to DM's impressive track record of failure.
Unintentional Jackass !LASXURl1b6 replied with this 13 years ago, 3 minutes later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,366
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 22 minutes later, 13 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,375
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk (OP) double-posted this 13 years ago, 15 minutes later, 13 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,377
Oh, also, I really don't want her as a girlfriend right now. If we got back together it would just be the same song, and dance. I truly do just want to be friends. The only way I'd ever date her again is if we were just friends for a long time, and an entirely new romance devoloped. Not just a patching up of the previous one.
HaikerensGuide !dBGi/iH4eY replied with this 13 years ago, 1 hour later, 14 hours after the original post[^] [v] #420,391
Postmortem !!FVJOHfXUk (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 2 days later, 3 days after the original post[^] [v] #420,801
She probably read this, and still choseto ignore me. Whatever, seriously whatever. I've paid my fucking dues, I've felt enough heart ache, I am better than this. I can't change how I feel, but I can sure as hell recognize when I am putting in effort for someonewho doesn't give a single shit about me. Honestly, even if I hated someone I would text them back if they were as desperate to talk to me as I was to talk to Lexi.