Topic: so if i liked a chick and was thinking about marriage
squeegee started this discussion 13 years ago #25,257
Would it be wrong of me to covertly collect a DNA sample and have it screened for genetic defects? Chances are after it's done i'll know more about her long term health potential than even she does. I wouldn't want to have a kid with someone who might give it down syndrome.
I mean, what if she refuses to abort? Maybe it's an invasion of privacy, but i'm trying to save a life here! Mine!
I mean, what if she refuses to abort? Maybe it's an invasion of privacy, but i'm trying to save a life here! Mine!
| Poll option | Votes | Percentage | Graph |
|---|---|---|---|
| No ethical problem here | 6 | 67% | |
| Uh... You can do that? | 3 | 33% |
buspup !!x+kkCmnF4 joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 5 minutes later[^] [v] #385,950
Do it, before any sex act happens.
Anonymous C joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 12 minutes later, 18 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #385,951
squeegee (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 22 minutes later, 40 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #385,954
@previous (C)
Collecting it wouldn't be a violation. She could leave some DNA on a drinking glass or a hair brush. It's been discarded, i can posess it with no ethical concerns.
Having it then screened for genetic problems to determine suitability for reproduction should be fine.
@385,950 (buspup !!x+kkCmnF4)
Why? We're dating and having protected sex to avoid getting pregnant. We haven't discussed marriage in depth yet, but it's getting to be a consideration. But, i want to make undisclosed genetic screening as part of my determination.
If she's not suitable i won't take off the rubber or marry her. How's that?
Collecting it wouldn't be a violation. She could leave some DNA on a drinking glass or a hair brush. It's been discarded, i can posess it with no ethical concerns.
Having it then screened for genetic problems to determine suitability for reproduction should be fine.
@385,950 (buspup !!x+kkCmnF4)
Why? We're dating and having protected sex to avoid getting pregnant. We haven't discussed marriage in depth yet, but it's getting to be a consideration. But, i want to make undisclosed genetic screening as part of my determination.
If she's not suitable i won't take off the rubber or marry her. How's that?
buspup !!x+kkCmnF4 replied with this 13 years ago, 1 minute later, 42 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #385,957
buspup !!x+kkCmnF4 double-posted this 13 years ago, 19 seconds later, 42 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #385,958
squeegee (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 2 minutes later, 44 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #385,960
@385,957 (buspup !!x+kkCmnF4)
What if 'what if' was what was?
@previous (buspup !!x+kkCmnF4)
How is that a deception? I didn't even tell her i sent anything to a lab.
What if 'what if' was what was?
@previous (buspup !!x+kkCmnF4)
How is that a deception? I didn't even tell her i sent anything to a lab.
buspup !!x+kkCmnF4 replied with this 13 years ago, 3 minutes later, 48 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #385,966
Anonymous D joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 3 minutes later, 51 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #385,970
Why are you doing it behind her back? This sort of DNA check/screening is quite common practice these days and makes complete sense. What about checking your own DNA? Seems you have much to learn before you consider marriage. Was this never covered in School?
(Edited 6 minutes later.)
TTEH !JXsxEkDBLs joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 7 minutes later, 59 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #385,973
I think it would be wrong to do this and hide it from her, and you have no way of knowing if she feels similarly. Ask her, and if she thinks it's a good idea, do it. If she doesn't, don't.
doctor dreamworks md !jdTkvovFCQ joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 1 minute later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #385,975
squeegee (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 13 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #385,986
@385,966 (buspup !!x+kkCmnF4)
Well sure, that is why you pay to have them expedite things.
@385,970 (D)
Yeah, what if there is a genetic flaw in my DNA, she might break up with me! No, if i check her out and she's cool, then that eliminates a lot of potential problems. And if i find her Lineage is riddled with congenetal defects, then why add that to my unknown potential for genetic problems. (which is probably zero anyway)
@385,973 (TTEH !JXsxEkDBLs)
What if i just want to hide it and check her DNA though?
@previous (doctor dreamworks md !jdTkvovFCQ)
I don't know what dating is like in the netherlands, but in america we take it pretty damn seriously
Well sure, that is why you pay to have them expedite things.
@385,970 (D)
Yeah, what if there is a genetic flaw in my DNA, she might break up with me! No, if i check her out and she's cool, then that eliminates a lot of potential problems. And if i find her Lineage is riddled with congenetal defects, then why add that to my unknown potential for genetic problems. (which is probably zero anyway)
@385,973 (TTEH !JXsxEkDBLs)
What if i just want to hide it and check her DNA though?
@previous (doctor dreamworks md !jdTkvovFCQ)
I don't know what dating is like in the netherlands, but in america we take it pretty damn seriously
buspup !!x+kkCmnF4 replied with this 13 years ago, 3 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #385,989
@previous (squeegee)
Assuming that she'd accept. Many people will not have abortions. Besides, it's not like Texas makes it easy to do so.
Assuming that she'd accept. Many people will not have abortions. Besides, it's not like Texas makes it easy to do so.
squeegee (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 15 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #386,009
@previous (buspup !!x+kkCmnF4)
This is dallas. There's plenty of abortion here and she's an adult.
But you're right, exactly. What if she won't abort just because it's a downs baby. This is my concern. This is why i want to covertly screen her DNA. Are you even reading my replies?
This is dallas. There's plenty of abortion here and she's an adult.
But you're right, exactly. What if she won't abort just because it's a downs baby. This is my concern. This is why i want to covertly screen her DNA. Are you even reading my replies?
★henn★ joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 37 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,023
squeegee (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 1 minute later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,025
buspup !!x+kkCmnF4 replied with this 13 years ago, 19 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,034
Anonymous H joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 35 seconds later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,035
@386,025 (squeegee)
It is if you are capable of producing a defective baby. Who says your genes are prefect?
It is if you are capable of producing a defective baby. Who says your genes are prefect?
Anonymous I joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 17 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,037
you sound like an asshole all of that is weird
squeegee !first/o5zA joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 43 minutes later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,045
@386,034 (buspup !!x+kkCmnF4)yeah, Austin is way more hippyish, but Dallas is a very large city with around 7 million people in the combined Dallas/Fort Worth metroplex area.
so here's a list of the abortion clinics just in dallas.
@386,035 (H)
i've already said that my genes might not be perfect, but i can't care about that. there's nothing i can do about that even if i did know. i'm stuck with my genes.
but i don't have to be stuck with hers.
like i said earlier by making sure her genome is clean, i can minimize potential for the combined likely hood that either of us would lend defective genes to our child. but, i don't want her to sequence my DNA because if she finds a genetic problem she might leave me because of it. I just want to screen her for genetic problems like i do for venereal diseases. secret lab work.
@previous (I)
welcome to the 21st century
DXMeowth joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 5 hours later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,097
I don't see this as a problem, but if you are considering marriage I hope she can be 100% honest with you about family history.
Anonymous L joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 2 hours later, 11 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,114
It's fine as long as you do the same with your DNA and disclose all the health problems, potential future health problems, and conditions that you might pass on to your children, to her. Then she can also decide if she wants your fucked up genes. I have a feeling that you're no cream of the crop and should probably just stop being picky unless you want to be put through the same scrutiny.
Anonymous L double-posted this 13 years ago, 3 minutes later, 11 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,115
@386,025 (squeegee)
You're seriously an asshole that you think you should secretly sequence her DNA but think your DNA is none of her business. You're an amoral hypocrite, and I hope she does leave you, if not for hereditary reasons, simply because you're an asshole.
You're seriously an asshole that you think you should secretly sequence her DNA but think your DNA is none of her business. You're an amoral hypocrite, and I hope she does leave you, if not for hereditary reasons, simply because you're an asshole.
Anonymous L triple-posted this 13 years ago, 4 minutes later, 11 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,116
One more thing. Sequencing her DNA will not tell you the likelihood of her conceiving a child with an extra chromosome. The normal, mature thing to do would be to sit down and have a serious discussion about what you would do in such a child were conceived. If she says that she would abort it then you know that you have a compatible relationship. If she says she would not, then you go from there. So, you know, maybe treat your significant other like they're an important mutual partner in your life instead of treating her like a fucking surrogate.
Ashe joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 3 hours later, 14 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,129
OP why are you even getting married if this is how you would treat your wife?
squeegee !first/o5zA replied with this 13 years ago, 5 hours later, 19 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,141
so i got the results from her STD screening this morning.
She doesn't have anything i don't already have, which is oddly coincidental, it's like we were made for each other!
@386,115 (L)
> You're seriously an asshole that you think you should secretly sequence her DNA but think your DNA is none of her business. You're an amoral hypocrite, and I hope she does leave you, if not for hereditary reasons, simply because you're an asshole.
i can see you harbor some resentment, so i can assume that any advice you have for me will be ill-willed and unhelpful
> The normal, mature thing to do would be to sit down and have a serious discussion about what you would do in such a child were conceived. If she says that she would abort it then you know that you have a compatible relationship. If she says she would not, then you go from there. So, you know, maybe treat your significant other like they're an important mutual partner in your life instead of treating her like a fucking surrogate.
yeah. not falling for it, asshole.
@previous (Ashe)
who said i'm getting married?
She doesn't have anything i don't already have, which is oddly coincidental, it's like we were made for each other!
@386,115 (L)
> You're seriously an asshole that you think you should secretly sequence her DNA but think your DNA is none of her business. You're an amoral hypocrite, and I hope she does leave you, if not for hereditary reasons, simply because you're an asshole.
i can see you harbor some resentment, so i can assume that any advice you have for me will be ill-willed and unhelpful
> The normal, mature thing to do would be to sit down and have a serious discussion about what you would do in such a child were conceived. If she says that she would abort it then you know that you have a compatible relationship. If she says she would not, then you go from there. So, you know, maybe treat your significant other like they're an important mutual partner in your life instead of treating her like a fucking surrogate.
yeah. not falling for it, asshole.
@previous (Ashe)
who said i'm getting married?
(Edited 11 seconds later.)
Anonymous N joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 12 minutes later, 19 hours after the original post[^] [v] #386,142
Just so you know, we down syndrome people can become very intelligent.