Anonymous A started this discussion 13 years ago#24,746
I think I could probably kill a police dog with my bare hands. First I would punch it in the head as hard as possible, then strangle it. Or reach underneath it and get a double handed grip on its neck when it lunges forward to bite, then just hold it down until it stops breathing. A dog cannot bite you if you hold it properly. Failing that, it's not really too difficult to break the hind legs of a German Shepard, with enough force it could easily be done. I'd like to see it chase me after I cripple it.
Am I delusional? Would a dog be too fast? What's to stop me strangling the bastard or just caving its head in if it locked onto one of my limbs?
Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 1 minute later[^][v]#380,800
Oh yes, I'm sure that the police dog would just sit there and let you do all of this.
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 14 minutes later, 16 minutes after the original post[^][v]#380,804
@previous (B)
What's it going to do if I'm holding it in a way that it can't bite? Try to pull away? I punch it again.
Anonymous B replied with this 13 years ago, 6 minutes later, 22 minutes after the original post[^][v]#380,806
@previous (A)
Your main problem is getting it into the hold in the first place when you say "first I would punch it as hard as o could", you're assuming that the police dog isn't already attacking you, and that your punch would hurt it enough for you to get ahold of it.
A police dog would fuck you up, lad.
Anonymous C joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 1 hour later, 2 hours after the original post[^][v]#380,813
@previous (B)
Yeah, a police dog is not going to let that happen.
Anonymous D joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 1 minute later, 2 hours after the original post[^][v]#380,814
Police dogs are trained to sit perfectly still as their legs are snapped, and police dogs are never accompanied by, like, a police officer or anything.
squeegee joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 2 hours later, 5 hours after the original post[^][v]#380,836
My brother was an army ranger. He went through their version of escape and evade school (whatever it's called.) he was taught to incapacitate an attack dog.
Big dogs are very fast, and can outweigh you. Attack dogs are trained to run, lunge, and rip. They lunge and bite at whatever extrenity you hold up to defebd yourself. Without protective clothing your hands and arms, legs and feet get ripped to shreds.
So if you're escaping a North Vietnamese internment camp and are being chased by an attack dog, the US Army rangers recommend to stand your ground, and wait for the dog to lunge and bite. As it does punch it inside the mouth with your fingers making a point. The dogs momentum coupled with your punch will send your hand into the dogs throat.
Now ball up your fist and hold on until the dog chokes to death. He will gnash and bite your arm, likely ripping it up pretty good. You can imagine how hard it would fight.
Anyway, that what they told him to do.
And it really only works on one dog. If there's 2 you're fucked.
Oh yeah, that's why there's always two, so you can't really fight them.
Anonymous F joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 55 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^][v]#380,853
@previous (squeegee)
I had a dream that i killed a friend in that way
Postmortem !!Qe8ScDbX+ joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 2 hours later, 8 hours after the original post[^][v]#380,928
Anonymous H joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 25 minutes later, 9 hours after the original post[^][v]#380,941
> What's to stop me strangling the bastard or just caving its head in if it locked onto one of my limbs?
Probably the 3 other dogs and group of policemen running to your location
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 3 hours later, 12 hours after the original post[^][v]#380,993
@previous (H)
No no, I'm just talking about a one on one with a dog.
Anonymous B replied with this 13 years ago, 12 minutes later, 12 hours after the original post[^][v]#380,996
@previous (A)
You'd still lose. No way you're going to be able to get it into your magical dog killing hold. It would bite your cock off before you even got to use your magical dog stunning punch.
squeegee !hbZVTk6JYc joined in and replied with this 13 years ago, 11 minutes later, 12 hours after the original post[^][v]#381,002
@previous (B)
pretty much this. and even if you kill it that dog is gonna fuck you up something good.
i guess it kind of depends on your size vs. his size, but regardless 1+ inch canines could tear out your throat and rip all the tendons on your arms.
and if it's a trained attack dog then you're really not going to kill it.
not without a weapon.
interestingly a simple pointed stick can defeat all wildlife.
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 13 years ago, 24 minutes later, 13 hours after the original post[^][v]#381,006
@380,996 (B)
With enough PCP in my system I think it could easily be done.
Anonymous H replied with this 13 years ago, 4 hours later, 17 hours after the original post[^][v]#381,064
> No no, I'm just talking about a one on one with a dog.
That's a pointless thought experiment because it's never going to happen. Also German Shepherd attack dogs can accelerate to around 30MPH in just a few seconds and are trained to leap at your throat, so if you're on PCP there's no way you're going to have the dexterity needed to land your magic chokehold in the split-second opportunity you're going to have.