Minichan

Topic: What are the chances of Chris-chan actually finding love?

Anonymous A started this discussion 14 years ago #18,724

I mean, they say out of the near nine billion people on this Earth, there's somebody for everyone.
What are the chances that Chris would met his?

Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 1 minute later[^] [v] #309,789

Image went missing

Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 4 seconds later, 2 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #309,790

Zero.

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 14 years ago, 5 minutes later, 7 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #309,792

@309,789 (B)
This is doctored, right?

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 1 minute later, 8 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #309,794

@previous (A)
It is. Jimmy Jazz was doing some shit trolling and this was the end product. It fooled a few people.

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 14 years ago, 12 minutes later, 21 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #309,797

@previous (B)
It did make me curious. What is Chris' taste in women?

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 4 minutes later, 25 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #309,800

@previous (A)
Ultimately the answer is someone who will coddle his manchild behavior.

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 14 years ago, 1 minute later, 26 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #309,801

@previous (B)
So ethnicity doesn't matter to him? Would he be willing to date a black girl?

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 4 minutes later, 31 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #309,802

@previous (A)
Doubtful.

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 14 years ago, 2 minutes later, 34 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #309,803

You know, how come Chris hasn't attempted to hire a prostitute to be his boyfriend-free girlfriend?

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 8 minutes later, 42 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #309,806

@previous (A)
Because he believes his virginity is a gift to the opposite sex although he insists he should get a discount at any rate.

Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 16 minutes later, 59 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #309,809

Slim. Being a long-term love of Chris Chan's would be very demanding. They'd basically be acting as a mother.

@309,803 (A)
He did talk to one over the ohone once, but she hung up on him.

@previous (B)
Yep. In the phonecall he wanted sex for free, which was hilarious since he was talking to a prostitute.

squeegee !firstkPE1Q joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 3 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #309,810

@previous (Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx)
How did he justify getting free sex from a prostitute?

Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx replied with this 14 years ago, 4 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #309,811

@previous (squeegee !firstkPE1Q)
A sense of entitlement. He feels entitled to sex because he's a virgin.

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 2 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #309,812

@309,810 (squeegee !firstkPE1Q)
Chris has a humongous ego, that's all there is to it.

squeegee !firstkPE1Q replied with this 14 years ago, 20 seconds later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #309,813

@309,811 (Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx)
Uh huh.
Wow. So the bitch wouldn't fuck him for free? What a whore.

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 8 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #309,814

@previous (squeegee !firstkPE1Q)
Chris' words:

"In my sarch [sic] on Craigslist, the ONLY women who left a phone number on their Ad were under "Adult Services", which they would have wanted money. I tried calling one, learned she wanted a hundred, then in the middle of telling my story about Jack and my PSN account recovery with a Sex video, she hung up on me. :("

Later he tried to market himself as a male escort under the name of "Carlos Chantor".

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 14 years ago, 3 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #309,815

@previous (B)
Was anybody interested in his service?

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 3 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #309,816

Image went missing@previous (A)
His profile mentioned that he was available for all fetishes but he changed his mind when one of his trolls called him to ask if he was into watersports. So the answer is no, nobody was interested in his "services".

squeegee !firstkPE1Q joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 1 hour later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #309,841

@previous (B)
> I am a cool dude to hang with, and I can make you feel good emotionally
best. pickup line. evar

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 16 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #309,843

Image went missing@previous (squeegee !firstkPE1Q)
You don't need good pickup lines when you got this much swag.

Anonymous G joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 6 hours later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #309,927

I have a job and dont live with my parents, but other than that and no criminal record, I'm doing as well as Chris chan.

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 1 minute later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #309,928

Image went missing@previous (G)

green !YzDEWwv9Z2 joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 3 hours later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #309,981

I thought there were 7 billion?

Negi Springfield !aeNZeP7XP2 joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 39 minutes later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #309,985

@previous (green !YzDEWwv9Z2)
9 billion is the current population estimate.

sage joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 2 hours later, 14 hours after the original post[^] [v] #310,006

@309,794 (B)

> It is. Jimmy Jazz was doing some shit trolling and this was the end product. It fooled a few people.

It's real.

Anonymous K joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 2 hours later, 17 hours after the original post[^] [v] #310,033

@309,985 (Negi Springfield !aeNZeP7XP2)
no it's not

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 14 years ago, 7 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,123

@previous (K)
I thought it was myself. Is it still around 8 billion?

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 1 hour later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,130

@previous (A)
It just recently hit 7 billion. green is correct.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_population

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 double-posted this 14 years ago, 7 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,133

@310,123 (A)
It might hit 8 billion by 2020. Maybe then Chris Chan will have a chance at finding love. He just needs to find a girl just as ugly and retarded as he is who also happens to have a fetish for coddling man-children. Then as long as they're both sterile and there's no chance of them ever reproducing, we can be happy for him.

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 14 years ago, 8 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,134

@310,130 (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
I don't know where I heard 8 billion from. I remember some program reporting on how the human population reached another milestone.

@previous (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
Why would an added billion make a difference? Can't he find love with 7 billion?

squeegee !firstkPE1Q replied with this 14 years ago, 2 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,135

@previous (A)
as highly unlikely as it is he'll need every chance he can get.

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 14 years ago, 8 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,136

@310,134 (A)
7 billion was the milestone. You may have misheard or some reporter misspoke. They might have said something about when it will approach 8 billion. Human population has been increasing exponentially since agriculture first began, but now it's believed that we're going to plateau, with many different estimates on when and how.

Stealth joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 10 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,137

@OP

> I mean, they say out of the near nine billion people on this Earth

He could find a def & blind gal. He cannot afford to feed and house her, much less pay for her maxi pads.

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 14 years ago, 26 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,139

@previous (Stealth)
He couldn't take care of a cat, let alone handle a relationship. He wants a woman who will be his mother and have sex with him and yes that is just as bad as it sounds.

Stealth replied with this 14 years ago, 4 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,140

@previous (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
IF he one day ends up with the cash to pay for it he can find zillions of gals who live in some 3rd world country who want to live in States. Now he may end up hacked to death in the process.

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 14 years ago, 20 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,141

@310,136 (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
When will humanity turn to space to solve population issues?

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 14 years ago, 6 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,143

@previous (A)
Probably never. The population issue will solve itself. The population will no longer increase if earth cannot sustain the population. If expanding into space and other planets is possible, it will happen for its own sake, not for the sake of increasing the population.

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 14 years ago, 17 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,144

@previous (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
Didn't Newt Gingrich promise a moon colony?

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 14 years ago, 10 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,145

@previous (A)
> politician
> promise
Yeah.

Seriously though, a moon base of some sort is possible, even practical, but it would be just enough to sustain a handful of people, like a space station, not as a permanent home for people to populate. It would make great base for launching things into space.

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 14 years ago, 21 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,148

@previous (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
Wouldn't the reason for colonizing the moon be so we could get to Mars?

Nexus !jNexusRe/. joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 5 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,151

@previous (A)
Unlikely, the most logical reason to colonize the moon is for the resources, mostly the abundance of Helium-3. The fact it would make a good launching station is just a plus. We will never colonize a body in space just to be explorers, its too economically unfeasible.

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 14 years ago, 41 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,153

@310,148 (A)
@previous (Nexus !jNexusRe/.)
This, and yes, we could use the moon as a sort of launching pad to help us get to Mars, but not to colonize Mars. All that stuff about terraforming is bogus. It's uninhabitable. Even if terraforming Mars were possible, it would take almost all of Earth's resources, and Mars has no magnetic field, which leaves life too susceptible to radiation.

Anonymous O joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 11 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,235

@previous (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)

you don't need a magnetic field to keep an atmosphere. Look at Venus - it has no magnetic field, a solar flux ~12 times Mars and its atmosphere is a crushing soup 90 bars dense.

As for making Mars more friendly for life, this is the engineering discipline of Terraforming.

To terraform Mars, this is how I think you should go about it:
-- Heat Mars with super green house gases like CF4, C2F6, C3F8, N2O and SF6.
-- Warm the poles with statite sollettas. (Giant mirrors to prevent the water vapor in the air from all freezing out at the poles. We want lots of water flowing on the surface to speed things up.)
-- Introduce lichen, blue green algae and microscopic life. This will darken the planet and start adding O2 to the air.

If we can warm up the south pole of Mars by 5 degrees C, its CO2 cap will sublime (evaporate) and enter the atmosphere further warming the planet. We will have hit a tipping point and move Mars into a new climate some 30 degrees warmer and with enough pressure that you won't need a space suit. (You will need an air tank and mask tho, as the air still will lack oxygen.)

That is all that is needed really. Once the air starts getting thicker, it will keep getting thicker as CO2 clathrates melt and CO2 is driven out of cold clays. This will greatly reduce radiation on the surface and warm the planet further. To speed things up you could:
-- Drop comets or 'iceteroids' on Mars to add volitiles (liquid water and gases). Ammonia (NH3) is very valuable as it brings more nitrogen to Mars and is a powerful green house gas until it breaks down.
-- Use non-fission bomb pumped hydrogen bombs to melt aquifers and restart volcanoes. (This would require a research project to build as we don't have the technology now.)
-- Use the clean bombs described above to 'cook' nitrate beds adding nitrogen to the air. This is important. Plants need nitrogen and some can fix it from the air, but we need more in the air in the first place.
-- Introduce cold resistant species that can make peat moss or salt water marsh type ecosystems. These will rapidly move minerals into forms life can use.
-- Add crawling insects to pollenize plants (when O2 gets to reasonable levels) as you need high concentrations of O2 for flying but bugs can crawl in low oxygen environments first.
-- Put a 'large' moon in equatorial orbit low over Mars. This will help stabilize Mar's Climate over the long term.

The best book on Terraforming in print is "The Case for Mars" by Robert Zubrin.

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 14 years ago, 1 hour later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,258

@previous (O)
I didn't say you need a magnetic field to keep an atmosphere (although you actually do), I said that you need a magnetic field to shield the planet from radiation. The earth's magnetic field keeps us shielded from a lot of the sun's radiation, particularly from solar flares. And yes, solar flares will gradually strip a planet of its atmosphere. That's one theory on why Mars atmosphere is so thin. It lost its magnetic field, and lost most of its atmosphere afterwards.

All those things you mentioned would take way too much of Earth's resources to accomplish, and even then, the atmosphere would not keep us shielded from solar flares. A planet with a magnetic field is a requirement for a planet to be habitable.

brainwurms !!gbU9At49F joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 1 minute later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,259

@310,235 (O)
10/10
Curiosity really makes the case for longevity.

Anonymous D replied with this 14 years ago, 7 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,260

Wait, how did we get from Chris to space colonisation? Not that I'm complaining, mind.

Nexus !jNexusRe/. replied with this 14 years ago, 53 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #310,268

@310,235 (O)
Im not saying terraforming mars is not possible, I am saying its there is no economic incentive to do so, outside of just going there to satisfy our curiosity and to explore. Unless some incredibly valuable mineral is found on mars or some alien extremophile is found, anything beyond a research station is a pipe dream. The investment simply isn't there. Why would we spend trillions on making a planet habitable, when that money would obviously be more profitable being invested elsewhere?

Anonymous O replied with this 14 years ago, 17 hours later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,400

@previous (Nexus !jNexusRe/.)

The same reason we would spend trillions on fighting sandkips in Afghanistan and Iraq. Governments don't want profit, they want power.

Anonymous O double-posted this 14 years ago, 3 minutes later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,402

@310,258 (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)

When the solar wind encounters a nonmagnetic planet with an atmosphere, the planet's ionosphere creates forces that slow and divert the flow. Venus' dense atmosphere and the large-scale currents induced in its conducting ionosphere prevent the solar wind from reaching its surface.

The remaining planets are farther from the sun than the Earth. Mars is located at 1.5 AU, Jupiter at 5.2 Au, Saturn at 9.5 AU, Uranus at 19 AU, Neptune at 30 AU, and Pluto at almost 40 AU. The solar wind's density and speed decrease with distance from the sun, so these planets would not need magnetospheres as strong as the Earth's to protect them.

So by increasing the strength of the atmosphere it would be possible to make Mars habitable.

Anonymous M replied with this 14 years ago, 6 hours later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,458

Image went missing@previous (O)
Mars may be habitable but who would want to live there?

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 1 day later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,921

Image went missinglol

kook !uK5to98ywY joined in and replied with this 14 years ago, 3 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,923

@previous (B)
why does he keep saying that patty and his father are in hell? this offends me more than a lot of his other bullshit.

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 1 minute later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,924

@previous (kook !uK5to98ywY)
He's dumb?

kook !uK5to98ywY replied with this 14 years ago, 3 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,926

@previous (B)
true.

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 1 minute later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,927

@previous (kook !uK5to98ywY)
If you read that screencap he claims to have a gun. That is to say he isn't talking about attacking people with his Megatron pistol.

kook !uK5to98ywY replied with this 14 years ago, 8 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,928

@previous (B)
he says "armed". with him, that could mean anything,

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 14 years ago, 1 hour later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,957

@310,923 (kook !uK5to98ywY)
I didn't know his dad died. He apparently died of heart failure last September. No surprise there. With a son like that, I'm surprised his heart lasted as long as it did.

kook !uK5to98ywY replied with this 14 years ago, 1 minute later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,958

@previous (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
he was very old as well. bob was around sixty and barb forty when he was conceived. It's like they tried to create an autist.

(Edited 14 seconds later.)

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 14 years ago, 1 minute later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,959

@previous (kook !uK5to98ywY)
What the fuck? They asked for it.

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 47 seconds later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,960

Image went missing@310,957 (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
@310,958 (kook !uK5to98ywY)
RIP

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 14 years ago, 51 seconds later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,962

@previous (B)
HAHAHAHA

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 2 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,966

@310,959 (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
In Bob's defense he was the only real authority figure and other male Chris had/respected. Plus the fact that he and Barb met in a bar and potentially conceived Chris while both were drunk.

Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 14 years ago, 6 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,974

@previous (B)
> In Bob's defense he was the only real authority figure and other male Chris had/respected.
I assumed as much.
> Plus the fact that he and Barb met in a bar and potentially conceived Chris while both were drunk.
That explains a lot.

kook !uK5to98ywY replied with this 14 years ago, 31 seconds later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,976

@310,960 (B)
beautiful. who made this?

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 3 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,979

@previous (kook !uK5to98ywY)
I can't remember but I found it somewhere on deviantArt after searching for "troll" or "chris chan" or "cwc". Something along those lines.

kook !uK5to98ywY replied with this 14 years ago, 7 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,983

@previous (B)
thank you for sharing it.

Anonymous B replied with this 14 years ago, 15 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #310,987

Image went missing@previous (kook !uK5to98ywY)
Sure. Chris is also on paheal which leads to some really odd stuff such as this.
:

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