Topic: The Santa Guild
Anonymous A started this discussion 15 years ago #15,597
Now hear me out on this, but, listen. What if there was an International Guide of Santas ran by the main Santa Claus. People always ask how he can deliver presents in one night, well, that is because he doesn't. He gives a large sack of gifts to one Santa who then delivers them to all of the houses within his area and then passes the sack off to the next Santa for the next area he covers. This continues until the end of Christmas Eve in all time zones. This way all of the presents get delivered in one night and the real Santa takes all of the notoriety.
Either this or the elves just pre-deliver the gifts with instructions for the parents to not put them out until Christmas Eve.
Either this or the elves just pre-deliver the gifts with instructions for the parents to not put them out until Christmas Eve.
Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later[^] [v] #272,127
Anonymous C joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 14 minutes later, 16 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #272,138
Or maybe he just doesn't exist and parents buy presents from corporations and wrap them in paper bought from corporations. They pay for this stuff by working for corporations.
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 18 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #272,140
@previous (C)
Or perhaps that's just what the guild wants you to think so you don't expose their operations.
Or perhaps that's just what the guild wants you to think so you don't expose their operations.
Anonymous D joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 38 minutes later, 56 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #272,159
@272,138 (C)
That can't be true. He eats the mince pies and drinks the brandy I leave out for him and I saw him kissing my Mom one year, so there!!.
That can't be true. He eats the mince pies and drinks the brandy I leave out for him and I saw him kissing my Mom one year, so there!!.
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 5 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #272,162
Anonymous E joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 11 hours later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #272,322
What if Santa's just Jesus? I mean all them old pics of Jesus you see, well he woulda put on some weight+had his hair turn white by now due to aging and we all know he's a couple thousand years old. He has the same powers, man! All them presents outta one bag? It's like that time with the fish all over again. And he "coincidentally" just happens to do all this shit only on Jesus' birthday. I need a fucking whisky
Anonymous F joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 4 minutes later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #272,323
Anonymous D replied with this 15 years ago, 46 minutes later, 13 hours after the original post[^] [v] #272,330
Anonymous G joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 1 hour later, 14 hours after the original post[^] [v] #272,333
> He gives a large sack of gifts to one Santa who then delivers them to all of the houses within his area and then passes the sack off to the next Santa for the next area he covers.
that would still break physics
i was with you until you said they still only use one bag of presents but now its just silly
that would still break physics
i was with you until you said they still only use one bag of presents but now its just silly
Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 15 years ago, 7 hours later, 21 hours after the original post[^] [v] #272,420
@previous (G)
Well, then, maybe each Santa was assigned a sack of his own and they all deliver the presents simultaneously.
Well, then, maybe each Santa was assigned a sack of his own and they all deliver the presents simultaneously.