Topic: What are your views on spanking?
hamfist !!mZuNK1i+C started this discussion 15 years ago #15,292
Is it ever an acceptable form of punishment? I stumbled upon some videos about it on YouTube and apparently it's a very hot topicAnonymous B joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later[^] [v] #267,923
Yes. Spanking is okay. Child abuse isn't. There is a clear and obvious difference.
Anonymous C joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 35 seconds later, 3 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,924
I used to think it was okay, but I'm becoming increasingly convinced that it's not.
squeegee !hbZVTk6JYc joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 4 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,925
why not? your kids belong to you.
Anonymous E joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 9 minutes later, 14 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,927
Spanking is only okay when r04r is posting pictures of it.
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 42 seconds later, 14 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,929
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 18 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,930
I feel like if you have to hit your child to prove that you're right, then you've failed as a parent. I have a younger sister and it would be both repulsive and unnecessary for me to hit her. I'm not an expert child raiser by any means, but if you can get your children to respect and obey you (not in a creepy way, in a "don't shove your face into the oven while I'm baking" way) without spanking , then you spanking is not needed. If you can't do that, then you're a shit parent and you shouldn't have any kids to begin with.
(Edited 1 minute later.)
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 19 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,932
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later, 22 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,933
@previous (C)
Other forms of non-physical punishment. Time-outs, loss of privileges, etc. If your kid is being a brat, try to reason with them, and if you can't, then speak with them on an instinctual level (e.g. "I won't buy you any toys if you don't do X"). Kids are primarily self-interested, so if they believe you when you say you will do something they don't like if they don't obey you, then they will obey you.
Other forms of non-physical punishment. Time-outs, loss of privileges, etc. If your kid is being a brat, try to reason with them, and if you can't, then speak with them on an instinctual level (e.g. "I won't buy you any toys if you don't do X"). Kids are primarily self-interested, so if they believe you when you say you will do something they don't like if they don't obey you, then they will obey you.
(Edited 18 seconds later.)
Anonymous B replied with this 15 years ago, 27 seconds later, 22 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,934
@267,929 (C)
One leaves a child mentally and perhaps physically scarred.
The other achieves a desirable result.
One leaves a child mentally and perhaps physically scarred.
The other achieves a desirable result.
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 24 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,936
@previous (B)
That difference is not very clear or obvious until years after the events.
That difference is not very clear or obvious until years after the events.
(Edited 2 minutes later.)
Anonymous C double-posted this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 26 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,937
@267,933 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
But how will you enforce those non-physical punishments? I don't think children have very good time preference; that your future reward method would likely fail.
But how will you enforce those non-physical punishments? I don't think children have very good time preference; that your future reward method would likely fail.
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 15 years ago, 7 minutes later, 33 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,939
@previous (C)
You just be consistent. If you say "If you don't behave then you lose your 3 favorite things" and then you take those things away, the kids will eventually grudgingly accept that you are in control, and they will do what they can to do roughly what you want, although they usually do it in the laziest, surliest possible way. There are many things that kids want to avoid, physical pain is just one of those things.
You just be consistent. If you say "If you don't behave then you lose your 3 favorite things" and then you take those things away, the kids will eventually grudgingly accept that you are in control, and they will do what they can to do roughly what you want, although they usually do it in the laziest, surliest possible way. There are many things that kids want to avoid, physical pain is just one of those things.
Anonymous B replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 34 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,940
@267,936 (C)
I've not actually heard of anyone been aversely affected by simply spanking. Could you perhaps link to such stories, if they exist?
I've not actually heard of anyone been aversely affected by simply spanking. Could you perhaps link to such stories, if they exist?
Anonymous G joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 4 minutes later, 39 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,941
If it's necessary, it's necessary; it will not negatively affect the child if it is not.
People are so averse to such light corporal punishment because they associate it with the stereotypical ass that uses a balled fist to solve every little parental problem.
People are so averse to such light corporal punishment because they associate it with the stereotypical ass that uses a balled fist to solve every little parental problem.
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 40 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,942
@267,939 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
> and they will do what they can to do roughly what you want, although they usually do it in the laziest, surliest possible way.
How is this a desirable result?
> and they will do what they can to do roughly what you want, although they usually do it in the laziest, surliest possible way.
How is this a desirable result?
Anonymous C double-posted this 15 years ago, 35 seconds later, 41 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,943
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later, 43 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,945
@267,942 (C)
Because at least it's sort of what you want. It's very difficult to get other adults to do what you want. With kids it's basically impossible, so you just have to settle. Your job as a parent is to make sure your child doesn't die and doesn't turn out to be a complete fuckup. If you can sort of get both goals mostly accomplished, then you're a pretty successful parent.
Because at least it's sort of what you want. It's very difficult to get other adults to do what you want. With kids it's basically impossible, so you just have to settle. Your job as a parent is to make sure your child doesn't die and doesn't turn out to be a complete fuckup. If you can sort of get both goals mostly accomplished, then you're a pretty successful parent.
Anonymous G replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 44 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,946
@267,943 (C)
Can it be? Yes. But very, very rarely, and it is extremely easy to fuck things up worse than if you had not done anything.
To put it simply, if hitting your child is not twice as painful for you, you should not be a parent.
Can it be? Yes. But very, very rarely, and it is extremely easy to fuck things up worse than if you had not done anything.
To put it simply, if hitting your child is not twice as painful for you, you should not be a parent.
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 47 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,947
@267,940 (B)
http://board.freedomainradio.com/forums/t/32072.aspx
Well-sourced and comprehensive overview of the prevalence and effects of spanking.
http://board.freedomainradio.com/forums/t/32072.aspx
Well-sourced and comprehensive overview of the prevalence and effects of spanking.
Anonymous C double-posted this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 50 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,948
@267,945 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
I don't know how much you're joking, but according to your posts a parent who spanks their child, and raises them into an intelligent, socially well-adjusted, healthy adult is a "shit parent", while on who doesn't spank their child, and their child is involved in numerous accidents and injuries, and is a fuckup, but not a complete one, is a successful parent. It's hard to take your serious arguments seriously when you intersperse them with shit like this.
I don't know how much you're joking, but according to your posts a parent who spanks their child, and raises them into an intelligent, socially well-adjusted, healthy adult is a "shit parent", while on who doesn't spank their child, and their child is involved in numerous accidents and injuries, and is a fuckup, but not a complete one, is a successful parent. It's hard to take your serious arguments seriously when you intersperse them with shit like this.
Anonymous C triple-posted this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 52 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,950
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later, 55 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #267,952
@267,948 (C)
I am being slightly tongue in cheek over the internet. You caught me. A parent who has so little control over their child that they need to spank their child to assert their authority is a bad parent. A parent who can raise their child to be a thoughtful, intelligent, responsible person without spanking is a good parent. I don't know how much more clearly I can make that distinction.
I am being slightly tongue in cheek over the internet. You caught me. A parent who has so little control over their child that they need to spank their child to assert their authority is a bad parent. A parent who can raise their child to be a thoughtful, intelligent, responsible person without spanking is a good parent. I don't know how much more clearly I can make that distinction.
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 7 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #267,954
@previous (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
So it's not the result that determines wether one was a good parent? Oh wait, it is, but only for non-spankers. You have two different sets of criteria.
So it's not the result that determines wether one was a good parent? Oh wait, it is, but only for non-spankers. You have two different sets of criteria.
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #267,956
@previous (C)
It's a two-tiered view of sorts. If you spank your children then you are automatically a bad parent, irrespective of the outcome of your child. If you don't spank your kid and you produce a bad child, then you are a bad parent. If you don't spank your kid and you produce a good kid, then you are a good parent.
It's a two-tiered view of sorts. If you spank your children then you are automatically a bad parent, irrespective of the outcome of your child. If you don't spank your kid and you produce a bad child, then you are a bad parent. If you don't spank your kid and you produce a good kid, then you are a good parent.
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 4 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #267,957
@previous (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
Why is spanking so important, regardless of whether it has any consequences?
Why is spanking so important, regardless of whether it has any consequences?
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 15 years ago, 9 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #267,961
@previous (C)
Because spanking is the crudest and most perverse (in my opinion) form of asserting dominance over someone who is physically weaker than you. Note that spanking would never be permitted between a boss and an employee, a husband and a wife, a nurse and a mentally handicapped patient, etc., yet for some reason it's okay between a parent and a child.
Because spanking is the crudest and most perverse (in my opinion) form of asserting dominance over someone who is physically weaker than you. Note that spanking would never be permitted between a boss and an employee, a husband and a wife, a nurse and a mentally handicapped patient, etc., yet for some reason it's okay between a parent and a child.
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #267,962
@previous (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
Neither would "time-outs" or violating their property rights.
It is certainly crude, but that is not necessarily a bad thing. Most people consider not spanking to be perverse (weird I know).
Neither would "time-outs" or violating their property rights.
It is certainly crude, but that is not necessarily a bad thing. Most people consider not spanking to be perverse (weird I know).
Unintentional Jackass !LASXURl1b6 joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 14 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #267,965
@previous (C)
Who would honestly think that? Don't say most, when you mean a handful.
As for me, I think that parents who resort to spanking to teach their children wrong from right either have poor parenting practices (not necessarily bad parents), or they have anger issues. Alternatives to spanking include, but are not limited to, exclusion from priveliges, having to eat foods they don't like, and being taught the bagpipes.
Who would honestly think that? Don't say most, when you mean a handful.
As for me, I think that parents who resort to spanking to teach their children wrong from right either have poor parenting practices (not necessarily bad parents), or they have anger issues. Alternatives to spanking include, but are not limited to, exclusion from priveliges, having to eat foods they don't like, and being taught the bagpipes.
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #267,968
@267,962 (C)
Kids don't have property rights really (at least not in the U.S.), and you're right that there is some leeway allotted to parents with respect to punishment of a child, but should parents be allowed to smack their child because they don't feel like doing a better job as a parent? My guess is that these conceptual disagreements will ultimately be settled by some empirical data (the long-term psychological effects of "non-abusive" spanking), and I don't feel like crawling around JSTOR, SpringerLink, PubMed etc. at 2 in the morning.
Kids don't have property rights really (at least not in the U.S.), and you're right that there is some leeway allotted to parents with respect to punishment of a child, but should parents be allowed to smack their child because they don't feel like doing a better job as a parent? My guess is that these conceptual disagreements will ultimately be settled by some empirical data (the long-term psychological effects of "non-abusive" spanking), and I don't feel like crawling around JSTOR, SpringerLink, PubMed etc. at 2 in the morning.
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 1 hour later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #267,980
@267,965 (Unintentional Jackass !LASXURl1b6)
68% of American think spanking is not only good, but essential to child rearing. If you are omitting something essential to child rearing you are committing child neglect. Did you even look at the source I quoted, or did you just talk out of your ass?
68% of American think spanking is not only good, but essential to child rearing. If you are omitting something essential to child rearing you are committing child neglect. Did you even look at the source I quoted, or did you just talk out of your ass?
Anonymous C double-posted this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #267,982
@267,968 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
"Better job" is subjective, though. Spankers believe they are doing a better job than non-spankers.
> My guess is that these conceptual disagreements will ultimately be settled by some empirical data (the long-term psychological effects of "non-abusive" spanking)
Hopefully! The video I posted contained many alarming statistics about spanking.
"Better job" is subjective, though. Spankers believe they are doing a better job than non-spankers.
> My guess is that these conceptual disagreements will ultimately be settled by some empirical data (the long-term psychological effects of "non-abusive" spanking)
Hopefully! The video I posted contained many alarming statistics about spanking.
Unintentional Jackass !LASXURl1b6 replied with this 15 years ago, 19 minutes later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #267,989
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 1 hour later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #267,997
Nega !34Kas0OdzM joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 28 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,000
Depends on who is being spanked. ;-j
SQUARED :3 !L.....AlN. joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,001
@267,930 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
> I feel like if you have to hit your child to prove that you're right, then you've failed as a parent.
qft
> I feel like if you have to hit your child to prove that you're right, then you've failed as a parent.
qft
Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 1 hour later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,013
It's unnecessary and outdated.
Anonymous E replied with this 15 years ago, 4 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,014
@267,980 (C)
> 68% of American think spanking is not only good, but essential to child rearing.
Argument by numbers? Oh, of Americans... I see. Well, that is compelling. If so many Americans think so, it must be true, right?
> 68% of American think spanking is not only good, but essential to child rearing.
Argument by numbers? Oh, of Americans... I see. Well, that is compelling. If so many Americans think so, it must be true, right?
Anonymous L joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,015
@267,930 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
@267,933 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
@267,965 (Unintentional Jackass !LASXURl1b6)
@268,000 (Nega !34Kas0OdzM)
@268,013 (Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx)
These.
@267,933 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
@267,965 (Unintentional Jackass !LASXURl1b6)
@268,000 (Nega !34Kas0OdzM)
@268,013 (Killer Lettuce !!iNo3FkiZx)
These.
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 23 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,017
@268,014 (E)
Are you completely retarded? I am not arguing that the position these people hold is true; I am arguing that the majority of people think that spanking is essential for child-rearing - and I was right. UJ came into this thread, talking shit without educating himself about the subject, and implied I was a liar. He refused to apologize for his disrespsct.
Are you completely retarded? I am not arguing that the position these people hold is true; I am arguing that the majority of people think that spanking is essential for child-rearing - and I was right. UJ came into this thread, talking shit without educating himself about the subject, and implied I was a liar. He refused to apologize for his disrespsct.
Anonymous L replied with this 15 years ago, 40 minutes later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,019
@previous (C)
> I am arguing that the majority of people think that spanking is essential for child-rearing - and I was right.
You said "most people consider not spanking to be perverse" and then cited a 1995 survey of American parents. There's land outside the US.
> I am arguing that the majority of people think that spanking is essential for child-rearing - and I was right.
You said "most people consider not spanking to be perverse" and then cited a 1995 survey of American parents. There's land outside the US.
Anonymous E replied with this 15 years ago, 17 minutes later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,021
@268,017 (C)> Are you completely retarded?
Name calling. Very sophisticated.
> I am not arguing that the position these people hold is true; I am arguing that the majority of people think that spanking is essential for child-rearing
By numbers, right? At least that is the what your supporting data says, right? 68% of Americans believe it's true so it must be. That's your argument, right?
> I am arguing that the majority of people think that spanking is essential for child-rearing
And you seem to be failing.
(Edited 1 minute later.)
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 11 minutes later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,026
@268,019 (L)
I was talking about American attitudes to an American. Sorry if you don't feel included.
I was talking about American attitudes to an American. Sorry if you don't feel included.
Anonymous L replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,027
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 40 seconds later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,028
@268,021 (E)
> Name calling.
> no noun
Retardation confirmed.
> By numbers, right? At least that is the what your supporting data says, right? 68% of Americans believe it's true so it must be. That's your argument, right?
WTF? I am not arguing whether spanking is essential for child-rearing. I am arguing that 68% of Americans believe it to be so, and I am correct to argue that.
> And you seem to be failing.
You are seriously stupid.
> Name calling.
> no noun
Retardation confirmed.
> By numbers, right? At least that is the what your supporting data says, right? 68% of Americans believe it's true so it must be. That's your argument, right?
WTF? I am not arguing whether spanking is essential for child-rearing. I am arguing that 68% of Americans believe it to be so, and I am correct to argue that.
> And you seem to be failing.
You are seriously stupid.
Anonymous C double-posted this 15 years ago, 48 seconds later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,029
Anonymous E replied with this 15 years ago, 10 seconds later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,030
Anonymous L replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,032
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 31 seconds later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,033
Anonymous C double-posted this 15 years ago, 37 seconds later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,034
Anonymous E replied with this 15 years ago, 18 seconds later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,035
Anonymous L replied with this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,036
dw !AIy/L67q.s joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,037
on a completely unrelated note, a mod for the skyrim ui just got released and it's awesome!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dZl5Iujsbk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dZl5Iujsbk
Anonymous C replied with this 15 years ago, 8 minutes later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,040
Anonymous C double-posted this 15 years ago, 18 seconds later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,041
Anonymous L replied with this 15 years ago, 53 seconds later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,042
Anonymous E replied with this 15 years ago, 17 minutes later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,046
Anonymous N joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 50 minutes later, 10 hours after the original post[^] [v] #268,073
Give them a choice between a timeout or being spanked.