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Sir Carves-a-Lot started this discussion 1 hour ago#138,430
Oh my God, Sharon, look at his plate.
That’s four Yorkshire puddings.
He’s built a little wall of roast potatoes round the edge so the gravy can’t get out.
Who does he think he is, a civil engineer?
And the parsnips... they’re just so... stacked.
I like Toby Carvery and I cannot lie
Keep your fancy bistro with the foam on the side
When I roll in starving on a Sunday noon
And the Yorkshire’s sat there like a hot-air balloon
Heat lamp glowing on the turkey crown
Bloke in a white hat carving it down
Beef with a blush in the middle, just right
Pork with the crackling, crunch every bite
Reaching for the stuffing with the tongs up high
Roasties on the roasties, stacked up to the sky
Cauliflower cheese, slap it on the top
Gravy like a river and it don’t stop
Toby got stacked!
(Pile it high!)
Toby got stacked!
(Pile it high!)
Now my mate went vegan and he gave me a look
Like a slice of roast beef was a crime in his book
He’s sat there sulking with a nut roast, mate
While I’m three Yorkshires deep on my second plate
Peas in the corner rolling all about
Mint sauce, horseradish, don’t leave ’em out
Carrot and swede in a big orange smash
Red cabbage sweet, give the plate a splash
Pigs in blankets come December, I’ll take ten
Then I wink at the carver and I ask again
Some people like a drizzle, all dainty and neat
A swoosh on a slate, call it fine-dining treat
Nah, I want it pooling, want a gravy flood
Want the pudding floating like a boat in the mud
Don’t give me a sprig, don’t give me a smear
Give me meat on a plate that’ll last me a year
Belt’s undone by the second trip
Still eyeing up the crumble with a custard dip
Toby got stacked!
(Pile it high!)
Toby got stacked!
(Pile it high!)
Everybody in the queue! (Oi oi!)
Got your plate? (Oi oi!)
Mind the heat lamp, mate, it’ll singe your hand
Grab a Yorkshire, grab two, build a gravy dam
Back for the veg ’cause the veg’s on repeat
’Cause I like Toby Carvery and I cannot eat...