Minichan

Topic: the pea test: how to tell that you are with a fucking imbecile

boof started this discussion 1 month ago #136,353

There's a horseshit method of eating peas with a fork that is passed through the generations like a shitty hard fruitcake. You can tell when someone doesn't have good sense to shrug off nonsense by observing their pea-eating habits. I think you know what I'm talking about. The "look, look, I'm sophisticated. I'm sophisticated." method.

Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 1 month ago, 12 minutes later[^] [v] #1,447,310

Stupendous!

Oatmeal Fucker !BYUc1TwJMU joined in and replied with this 1 month ago, 18 minutes later, 31 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,311

It's not horse shit, you're just undignified. Learn how to eat nicely instead of shovelling them in your mouth like slop.

Anonymous D joined in and replied with this 1 month ago, 2 hours later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,316

@previous (Oatmeal Fucker !BYUc1TwJMU)
boof and dignified are complete opposites. Just like boof and intelligent, and boof and heterosexuality.

boof (OP) replied with this 1 month ago, 7 hours later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,337

@1,447,311 (Oatmeal Fucker !BYUc1TwJMU)
I use a fork, not a shovel, and not like slop, but like food.

boof (OP) double-posted this 1 month ago, 32 seconds later, 9 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,338

@1,447,316 (D)
hey you watch your whore mouth

Anonymous E joined in and replied with this 1 month ago, 1 hour later, 11 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,343

Beans on toast. Thanks.

boof (OP) replied with this 1 month ago, 49 minutes later, 12 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,345

"eoooh it is so gauche to eat a pea in its full roundness. a gentleman will gently slice a pea into halves. the halves may then be coaxed upon the underside of the tines of the fork and brought towards a pursed lower lip, tongue at the ready to guide each semipea into the waiting lip valley.

Oatmeal Fucker !BYUc1TwJMU replied with this 1 month ago, 5 hours later, 17 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,356

@1,447,337 (boof)

You certainly seem interested in being able to trough as quickly as possible. Do you put your arms on the table?

beef joined in and replied with this 1 month ago, 2 hours later, 19 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,374

Peas are the best example that comes to mind that shows the English style of holding a fork makes no sense.

boof (OP) replied with this 1 month ago, 2 hours later, 22 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,382

@1,447,356 (Oatmeal Fucker !BYUc1TwJMU)
what table

anyhow, why do you think forks are shaped the way they are shaped? to fool the unsophisticated among us into using it in the manner that makes sense if form follows function? truly, only the most well-learned of us can appreciate the delicate food ballet of using the fork in a most unintuitive way.

Anonymous G joined in and replied with this 1 month ago, 26 minutes later, 22 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,386

I just smash them and scoop up the pea smear.

Anonymous D replied with this 1 month ago, 47 minutes later, 23 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,393

@1,447,338 (boof)
bold words for someone with OP in its name

boof (OP) replied with this 1 month ago, 13 minutes later, 23 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,396

words!

Oatmeal Fucker !BYUc1TwJMU replied with this 1 month ago, 1 hour later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,407

@1,447,382 (boof)

They're shaped so that you hold the food and gently cut them into small delicate pieces, not so you can load them like a spoon and throw them down your hungry, ravenous maw

boof (OP) replied with this 1 month ago, 10 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,446

@previous (Oatmeal Fucker !BYUc1TwJMU)
a poor, uncharitable characterization that did not address the curvature of the implement at all

an aid to cutting, nugga please

Oatmeal Fucker !BYUc1TwJMU replied with this 1 month ago, 11 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,468

@previous (boof)

It's not curved so that you can use it as a second spoon

Anonymous H joined in and replied with this 1 month ago, 52 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,470

@1,447,311 (Oatmeal Fucker !BYUc1TwJMU)
peas are literally slop

Joshy replied with this 1 month ago, 16 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,447,471

the peepee test
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