Topic: A hooker said she would "do literally anything you want for fifty dollars"

Anonymous A started this discussion 2 years ago #115,027

I paid her. I made her go to culinary school and pay for it herself, and now she is my personal chef who works for free. She should have been more careful with her words.

Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 2 years ago, 1 minute later[^] [v] #1,271,412

So you waited years for a decent meal instead of just banging her in the ass then and there?

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 2 years ago, 1 minute later, 3 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,414

@previous (B)
Correct. But now, I get fine dining every single night. Oh, she also buys the groceries with her own money.

Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU joined in and replied with this 2 years ago, 49 seconds later, 4 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,415

@previous (A)
Frankly I find this part a little implausible.

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 2 years ago, 2 minutes later, 6 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,416

@previous (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
I mean, she entered into a legally-binding, verbal contract. I paid the $50. She was then obligated to do "literally anything I wanted".

Anonymous D joined in and replied with this 2 years ago, 3 minutes later, 10 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,418

where are those even a thing, i think we have brothels but i havent looked for em
escorts?

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 2 years ago, 3 minutes later, 14 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,420

@previous (D)
She was on the street corner. I bet she regrets her words now! I also make her do light housecleaning.

(Edited 13 seconds later.)

Anonymous B replied with this 2 years ago, 6 minutes later, 20 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,423

@previous (A)
What does your wife think about the arrangement?

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 2 years ago, 1 minute later, 22 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,424

@previous (B)
I don't have a wife. Why do you think I do?

Anonymous A (OP) double-posted this 2 years ago, 23 seconds later, 22 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,425

@1,271,423 (B)
I have a husband, idiot.

Anonymous B replied with this 2 years ago, 3 minutes later, 26 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,426

@1,271,424 (A)

> I don't have a wife. Why do you think I do?

You wrote on an obituary that you were married.

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 2 years ago, 2 minutes later, 28 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,428

@previous (B)
I think you have the wrong person.

Anonymous B replied with this 2 years ago, 55 seconds later, 29 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,429

@previous (A)
Would you like me to post the obituary so you can confirm it's not you?

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 2 years ago, 51 seconds later, 30 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,430

@previous (B)
No. I would like you to get out of my thread and stop derailing it with your weirdness.

Anonymous B replied with this 2 years ago, 2 minutes later, 33 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,432

@previous (A)
I'm not derailing it. You asked me why I think you're married and I answered your question. I then offered to prove it and you suddenly became skittish.

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 2 years ago, 46 seconds later, 33 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,434

@previous (B)
You brought up the marriage nonsense. Stop derailing my thread with your autism and weirdness.

Anonymous B replied with this 2 years ago, 7 minutes later, 41 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,436

@previous (A)

> You brought up the marriage nonsense.

It seemed apposite for a situation in which you're claiming to have a hooker on retainer.

> Stop derailing my thread with your autism

Hmmm, now who is it who always uses that "autism" phrase in these situations?

(Edited 1 minute later.)

Anonymous E joined in and replied with this 2 years ago, 1 hour later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,446

@previous (B)
And Matt goes silent, and abandons his thread.

Well done Anon B!

Anonymous A (OP) replied with this 2 years ago, 20 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,448

@previous (E)
I'm not Matt. I'm just not going to sit here and argue with a retarded person.

boof joined in and replied with this 2 years ago, 7 minutes later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,451

reminds me of the song "The Lapdance is so Much Better when the Stripper is Crying"

Anonymous G joined in and replied with this 2 years ago, 2 hours later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,480

@OP
In which country do you reside? The kind of bonded servitude you're describing could not be enforced in the United States.

Anonymous H joined in and replied with this 2 years ago, 36 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,485

@previous (G)
China

Anonymous G replied with this 2 years ago, 10 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,271,489

@previous (H)
Sounds legit.

Minichan