Topic: Woman’s Vagina Falls Out, Replaces It With “Perfect 13-Year-Old Vaginaâ€
Voice of !WisdomHsuU started this discussion 15 years ago #11,181
http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/blogs/sexist/2009/11/11/womans-vagina-falls-out-replaces-it-with-perfect-13-year-old-vagina/
Allison Henry had a rough year. A lot of bad shit went down, but long story short, her vagina fell out. Today, Ami Angelowicz at The Frisky detailed Henry's story. "I am going to spare you the details because I am squeamish and feel too pukey to write about them," explains Angelowicz. She does pass along this little tidbit about Henry's lady-bits, however: "As a consolation prize for all of her suffering (and it was a lot of suffering), she now has the vagina of a 13-year-old with perfect-looking labia."
Allow me to list all the horrific medical details of Henry's vagina-falling-out that are far, far less puke-tastic than the phrase "the vagina of a 13-year-old with perfect-looking labia." From Henry's testimony on MomLogic.com (emphasis mine):
"About ten weeks into my pregnancy, I was doing prenatal yoga and it felt like someone had rammed a pitchfork up my butt."
"when I ran to the bathroom, I saw I was gushing blood everywhere."
"I kept bleeding for 15 weeks straight."
"One day in the bathroom, I felt something kind of strange when I was wiping. There wasn't really a hole there—it felt kind of flat."
"I had a massive emergency appendectomy, I got gangrene, and I was hospitalized."
"One night, I took a look down there, and it was like my insides were on the outside and they were coming out."
"I went to my doctor and said, 'My vagina is falling out of my body!'"
"It was literally falling out of my body."
"It turned out I had complete uterine prolapse, where the uterus is falling out of the body. I also had rectocele, where the walls of the vagina are weakened, and your rectum is pushing into the back wall of your vagina. That explained why I had been constipated for months."
"I had to have surgery, and they took my uterus out. All the ligaments that hold the uterus in place were completely shredded by all the blood I'd lost in my second pregnancy."
"My doctor . . . had to untwist my bladder and place it right-side-up. It had twisted and turned upside down."
"seven days after my surgery, I was watching 'Snow White' with my daughter when my son came into the room. He didn't like the seating arrangement and sort of lunged on top of my daughter. I had to push him off her, and when I did, I heard a loud ripping sound. Oh, no. I looked under the comforter, and my entire bed was covered with blood. It was like a horror movie—you could see the blood filling the entire white bed."
"In 15 minutes, I had passed 10 huge palm-sized blood clots."
"the ER doctor was trying to figure out where the blood was coming from, but couldn't see because there was too much blood gushing out. . . He called my doctor and said: 'I can't see where it's coming from. She's bleeding so fast and so much, I can't see. I'm killing her!'"
"They put me on an antibiotic that I was allergic to — I got a full body rash and was covered in red bumps from my head to my ankles."
"Six months later, I started having this weird discharge that had a funky odor. I was still in pain. It turned out my body was now rejecting the second set of sutures."
Yep! I would rather hear about gangrene, hand-sized blood clots, full-body rashes, twisted bladders, loud internal ripping, weird discharge, anal pitchforks, month-long genital bleeding, and vagina loss than the happy ending that comes at the conclusion of this medical horror:
"The experience has been a total nightmare, but I'm happy to say I'm on the mend. We just had a cocktail party to celebrate me feeling healthy. And I do have the vagina of a 13-year-old virgin, with a perfect labia, as a bonus."
Listen, Henry. I'm happy for you. I am. You went through some bad shit, and now your vagina is back inside your body, and I think that's wonderful. But I never, ever, ever, ever again want to have to think about a grown woman having a "the vagina of a 13-year-old virgin." That's some messed up heebie-jeebies shit. I don't even want to Google that phrase, ever, for fear of what I might find.
Apparently, virginal pre-teen is kind of the gold standard for new vaginas on MomLogic.com. Hear the testimony of "Sara," a 37-year-old woman who recently became "a virtual born-again virgin" with her brand-spanking-new genitalia:
So now I'm on the mend, with a teenage-sized vagina. My husband has been such a doll since I've been home; cooking, vacuuming, cleaning and dressing the kids, taking them to and from school, buying me chocolates and cheerleader costumes . . . how sweet. My sister replied to this, "Well, how many husbands get two vaginas out of the same old wife?" As far as how this new organ is going to work in six weeks, when all restrictions are lifted, who knows? The way things are at present, no man's apparatus, even of the Fisher Price variety, could ever fit down there. Still, I'll try to write a follow up report when it happens. That is, if my husband and I ever leave the bedroom again!
Eww! Earmuffs! I know you're all excited about your new vaginas or whatever, but could you please refrain from referring to them as "teenage-sized," admiring your newly "virginal" look, and especially–-I'm begging you—invoking Fisher Price?
Allison Henry had a rough year. A lot of bad shit went down, but long story short, her vagina fell out. Today, Ami Angelowicz at The Frisky detailed Henry's story. "I am going to spare you the details because I am squeamish and feel too pukey to write about them," explains Angelowicz. She does pass along this little tidbit about Henry's lady-bits, however: "As a consolation prize for all of her suffering (and it was a lot of suffering), she now has the vagina of a 13-year-old with perfect-looking labia."
Allow me to list all the horrific medical details of Henry's vagina-falling-out that are far, far less puke-tastic than the phrase "the vagina of a 13-year-old with perfect-looking labia." From Henry's testimony on MomLogic.com (emphasis mine):
"About ten weeks into my pregnancy, I was doing prenatal yoga and it felt like someone had rammed a pitchfork up my butt."
"when I ran to the bathroom, I saw I was gushing blood everywhere."
"I kept bleeding for 15 weeks straight."
"One day in the bathroom, I felt something kind of strange when I was wiping. There wasn't really a hole there—it felt kind of flat."
"I had a massive emergency appendectomy, I got gangrene, and I was hospitalized."
"One night, I took a look down there, and it was like my insides were on the outside and they were coming out."
"I went to my doctor and said, 'My vagina is falling out of my body!'"
"It was literally falling out of my body."
"It turned out I had complete uterine prolapse, where the uterus is falling out of the body. I also had rectocele, where the walls of the vagina are weakened, and your rectum is pushing into the back wall of your vagina. That explained why I had been constipated for months."
"I had to have surgery, and they took my uterus out. All the ligaments that hold the uterus in place were completely shredded by all the blood I'd lost in my second pregnancy."
"My doctor . . . had to untwist my bladder and place it right-side-up. It had twisted and turned upside down."
"seven days after my surgery, I was watching 'Snow White' with my daughter when my son came into the room. He didn't like the seating arrangement and sort of lunged on top of my daughter. I had to push him off her, and when I did, I heard a loud ripping sound. Oh, no. I looked under the comforter, and my entire bed was covered with blood. It was like a horror movie—you could see the blood filling the entire white bed."
"In 15 minutes, I had passed 10 huge palm-sized blood clots."
"the ER doctor was trying to figure out where the blood was coming from, but couldn't see because there was too much blood gushing out. . . He called my doctor and said: 'I can't see where it's coming from. She's bleeding so fast and so much, I can't see. I'm killing her!'"
"They put me on an antibiotic that I was allergic to — I got a full body rash and was covered in red bumps from my head to my ankles."
"Six months later, I started having this weird discharge that had a funky odor. I was still in pain. It turned out my body was now rejecting the second set of sutures."
Yep! I would rather hear about gangrene, hand-sized blood clots, full-body rashes, twisted bladders, loud internal ripping, weird discharge, anal pitchforks, month-long genital bleeding, and vagina loss than the happy ending that comes at the conclusion of this medical horror:
"The experience has been a total nightmare, but I'm happy to say I'm on the mend. We just had a cocktail party to celebrate me feeling healthy. And I do have the vagina of a 13-year-old virgin, with a perfect labia, as a bonus."
Listen, Henry. I'm happy for you. I am. You went through some bad shit, and now your vagina is back inside your body, and I think that's wonderful. But I never, ever, ever, ever again want to have to think about a grown woman having a "the vagina of a 13-year-old virgin." That's some messed up heebie-jeebies shit. I don't even want to Google that phrase, ever, for fear of what I might find.
Apparently, virginal pre-teen is kind of the gold standard for new vaginas on MomLogic.com. Hear the testimony of "Sara," a 37-year-old woman who recently became "a virtual born-again virgin" with her brand-spanking-new genitalia:
So now I'm on the mend, with a teenage-sized vagina. My husband has been such a doll since I've been home; cooking, vacuuming, cleaning and dressing the kids, taking them to and from school, buying me chocolates and cheerleader costumes . . . how sweet. My sister replied to this, "Well, how many husbands get two vaginas out of the same old wife?" As far as how this new organ is going to work in six weeks, when all restrictions are lifted, who knows? The way things are at present, no man's apparatus, even of the Fisher Price variety, could ever fit down there. Still, I'll try to write a follow up report when it happens. That is, if my husband and I ever leave the bedroom again!
Eww! Earmuffs! I know you're all excited about your new vaginas or whatever, but could you please refrain from referring to them as "teenage-sized," admiring your newly "virginal" look, and especially–-I'm begging you—invoking Fisher Price?
!VoCaLoNunI joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 10 minutes later[^] [v] #200,819
Whaaaaaaaaat
Ks !KansasxqvM joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 13 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #200,820
Just reading that made me feel ill.grey !C.MxxuCiTo joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 14 minutes later, 28 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #200,825
Lol.
ninjj joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later, 30 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #200,826
> "About ten weeks into my pregnancy, I was doing prenatal yoga and it felt like someone had rammed a pitchfork up my butt."
eww
> "when I ran to the bathroom, I saw I was gushing blood everywhere."
ewwwww
> "I kept bleeding for 15 weeks straight."
well maybe if you didnt ram black dicks up it so much it wouldnt do that?
> "I went to my doctor and said, 'My vagina is falling out of my body!'"
> "It was literally falling out of my body."
blah blah tl;dr: woman was a big stank and wore her clit out
next time don't fuck niggers
eww
> "when I ran to the bathroom, I saw I was gushing blood everywhere."
ewwwww
> "I kept bleeding for 15 weeks straight."
well maybe if you didnt ram black dicks up it so much it wouldnt do that?
> "I went to my doctor and said, 'My vagina is falling out of my body!'"
> "It was literally falling out of my body."
blah blah tl;dr: woman was a big stank and wore her clit out
next time don't fuck niggers
Anonymous F joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 31 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #200,828
guis
where did she get the replacement vagina?
where did she get the replacement vagina?
!VoCaLoNunI replied with this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 35 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #200,830
Anonymous G joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 19 minutes later, 54 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #200,844
Voice of !WisdomHsuU (OP) replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 55 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #200,846
Anonymous H joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 56 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #200,862
great copypasta
swamplights !!V3J448+/B joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 17 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #200,867
swamplights !!V3J448+/B double-posted this 15 years ago, 51 seconds later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #200,869
Anonymous J joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 5 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #200,873
swamplights !!V3J448+/B replied with this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #200,875
Anonymous K joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #200,876
@200,867 (swamplights !!V3J448+/B)
@200,873 (J)
Why did he refer to them as "stank" instead of "skank"?
@200,873 (J)
Why did he refer to them as "stank" instead of "skank"?
Anonymous J replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #200,877
Nexus !jNexusRe/. joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 6 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #200,879
What has science done?swamplights !!V3J448+/B replied with this 15 years ago, 4 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #200,881
Ninjj replied with this 15 years ago, 2 days later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #203,174
Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 20 minutes later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #203,179
I wonder how her partner feels about her having a 13-year-old's vagina.
!VoCaLoNunI replied with this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #203,180
What were you searching for that made this appear?
Anonymous K replied with this 15 years ago, 15 minutes later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #203,183
Ninjj replied with this 15 years ago, 27 minutes later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #203,194
Freecode !!4IKKtS9GG joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #203,196
It's disgusting and a real waste. You could have used those medical resources to graft a fleshlight in there.
Freecode !!4IKKtS9GG double-posted this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #203,197
@203,179 (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
> I wonder how her partner feels about her having a 13-year-old's vagina.
> The operation is progressing nicely.
> I wonder how her partner feels about her having a 13-year-old's vagina.
> The operation is progressing nicely.
The Pony !.PonyTzEbE joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 5 hours later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #203,264
I lol'd at how easily he gave all those gory details and then spent so long talking about how ill the idea that 13-year olds have tight vaginas makes him ill.
(Edited 11 seconds later.)
Mack35532 joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 2 days later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,099
@203,179 (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
> I wonder how her partner feels about her having a 13-year-old's vagina.
Well he's feeling really good right about now! He's buying her cheerleader outfits and waiting until the restrictions are off. Then he can get into some young teen pussy....without breaking the law or cheating on his wife!
If anything women should be concerned that they become pressured to have vaginal surgery.
> I wonder how her partner feels about her having a 13-year-old's vagina.
Well he's feeling really good right about now! He's buying her cheerleader outfits and waiting until the restrictions are off. Then he can get into some young teen pussy....without breaking the law or cheating on his wife!
If anything women should be concerned that they become pressured to have vaginal surgery.
protip !!pMmAiEwOm joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,103
swamplights !!V3J448+/B replied with this 15 years ago, 47 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,119
cat !COOOOOLbus joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 2 hours later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,200
i didn't even cringe
Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 15 years ago, 6 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,204
@205,119 (swamplights !!V3J448+/B)
I agree. I think it's ridiculous that some women feel the need to cut their labia off. Or in this article, it's ridiculous that having a 13-year-old's vagina is something for a woman to be proud of and for a man to be excited about.
I agree. I think it's ridiculous that some women feel the need to cut their labia off. Or in this article, it's ridiculous that having a 13-year-old's vagina is something for a woman to be proud of and for a man to be excited about.
swamplights !!V3J448+/B replied with this 15 years ago, 2 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,206
@previous (Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4)
Well, I am glad that she got something pleasant out of this horrible experience.
Well, I am glad that she got something pleasant out of this horrible experience.
Broseph !!fxnDb+Ve4 replied with this 15 years ago, 6 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,214
@previous (swamplights !!V3J448+/B)
I'm just surprised that she considers that a bonus and another shitty part of the experience. I'd be pissed if my penis fell off and replaced with a 13-year-old's. I don't understand why society thinks a 13-year-old vagina is any different.
I'm just surprised that she considers that a bonus and another shitty part of the experience. I'd be pissed if my penis fell off and replaced with a 13-year-old's. I don't understand why society thinks a 13-year-old vagina is any different.
swamplights !!V3J448+/B replied with this 15 years ago, 40 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,243
StatistSocialist3000 joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 11 hours later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,631
Broseph and lamplight
It's weird. Do you think its biological for men to seek young mates and females old ones?
It's weird. Do you think its biological for men to seek young mates and females old ones?
Unintentional Jackass !LASXURl1b6 joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 1 hour later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,637
I, for one, would not complain, were my genitals to fall off and be replaced by a 13 year old's vagina.
Anonymous O replied with this 15 years ago, 3 hours later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,682
Good lord, people. It's not an actual 13-year old's vagina. It's a metaphor.
Her vagina is now as tight and new-looking as a virginal 13-year-old's vagina would be.
Her vagina is now as tight and new-looking as a virginal 13-year-old's vagina would be.
swamplights !!V3J448+/B replied with this 15 years ago, 18 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #205,689
@205,631 (StatistSocialist3000)
It really might be. The question is how much control we have over biology.
It really might be. The question is how much control we have over biology.
StatistSocialist3000 replied with this 15 years ago, 15 hours later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #206,116
StatistSocialist3000 double-posted this 15 years ago, 1 minute later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #206,118
@205,689 (swamplights !!V3J448+/B)
I think the real question is SHOULD we attempt to control our biology.
I think the real question is SHOULD we attempt to control our biology.
swamplights !!V3J448+/B replied with this 15 years ago, 15 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #206,431
StatistSocialist3000 replied with this 15 years ago, 14 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #206,929
Wade Wilson !IOdbnXsKDk joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 15 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #206,935
StatistSocialist3000 replied with this 15 years ago, 55 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #206,944
@previous (Wade Wilson !IOdbnXsKDk)
I'm very even tempered. I'm quite placid. I don't really get mad or amorous. But either way I think it's meaningless to separate biology from intellect.
I'm very even tempered. I'm quite placid. I don't really get mad or amorous. But either way I think it's meaningless to separate biology from intellect.
swamplights !!V3J448+/B replied with this 15 years ago, 8 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #207,136
StatistSocialist3000 replied with this 15 years ago, 6 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #207,335
swamplights !!V3J448+/B replied with this 15 years ago, 21 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #207,344
Breakfast of Champions !!snnYcROO9 joined in and replied with this 15 years ago, 7 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #207,349
lolwoops
(Edited 1 minute later.)
hamfist !!snnYcROO9 double-posted this 15 years ago, 33 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #207,350
inb4 cosmetic vaginal surgery becomes all the rage
swamplights !!V3J448+/B replied with this 15 years ago, 3 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #207,351
@previous (hamfist !!snnYcROO9)
It's growing more popular everyday.
http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1859937,00.html
It's growing more popular everyday.
http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1859937,00.html
(Edited 45 seconds later.)