Topic: Just arrived in Norilsk
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg started this discussion 4 months ago #115,117
Holy crap. Merrin was not joking that this is a grim place. Also, he was not completely honest about it. It's not JUST a mining town and weapons factory. There's an actually town here too, but it's pretty grim and freezing and gray. Still, my accommodations are very nice, and the administrators took me to a great dinner tonight to welcome me. This should be an interesting couple of months!
Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 27 minutes later[^] [v] #1,272,090
Merrin is not honest about anything. You should hunt him down and kick him in the nuts.
Anonymous C joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 26 minutes later, 53 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,091
Fat cunt!
PooPooManCat replied with this 4 months ago, 14 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,092
Hello. I'm new here.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 2 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,096
Beautiful downtown Norilsk.Erik !saAqdaazn2 joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 55 minutes later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,100
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 3 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,101
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) double-posted this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,105
Wow, this place is hard to live in. Still, I've found a good coffee shop and a restaurant. I can survive with these. The town is so grim and cold. Well, this afternoon, I start my research. I have a Russian partner who happens to speak great English, and she's going to help me with my research. I can't wait!
Erik !saAqdaazn2 replied with this 4 months ago, 20 seconds later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,106
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,107
dw !p9hU6ckyqw joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 4 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,108
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,109
@previous (dw !p9hU6ckyqw)
Unfortunately, I can't, as I plan to publish a paper on them, so I can't let out the research until that is published. I'll give you general information though.
Unfortunately, I can't, as I plan to publish a paper on them, so I can't let out the research until that is published. I'll give you general information though.
Anonymous F joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 4 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,112
@1,272,096 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
This from a series called “Below Zero” by French Photographer Christophe Jacrot
This from a series called “Below Zero” by French Photographer Christophe Jacrot
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 5 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,113
@previous (F)
Correct. I did not take the photo, nor did I ever claim to. There's a blizzard right now, and it's impossible to see, much less take photos. It is, however, an accurate depiction of Norilsk.
Correct. I did not take the photo, nor did I ever claim to. There's a blizzard right now, and it's impossible to see, much less take photos. It is, however, an accurate depiction of Norilsk.
Anonymous F replied with this 4 months ago, 44 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,119
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Take a picture of your hand against the window with visible blizzard
Take a picture of your hand against the window with visible blizzard
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 8 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,120
@previous (F)
No thanks. I am busy. I have nothing to prove to you. And I don't take orders from people online.
No thanks. I am busy. I have nothing to prove to you. And I don't take orders from people online.
Anonymous G joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 15 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,122
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)> No thanks. I am busy. I have nothing to prove to you. And I don't take orders from people online.
Anonymous H joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 35 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,123
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc double-posted this 4 months ago, 56 minutes later, 8 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,125
Just FYI it's almost 3000km from Moscow to Norilsk (more than from New York to California) and OP is claiming he made the journey by train in less than a morning. The journey would actually take about a week given the route you'd have to take to get even remotely close to the city nearest to Norilsk. I provide this info for the Chuckle Brother who gets triggered as fuck when I take OP's shtick seriously.
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 5 hours later, 13 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,136
Please mods do not lock this thread. Let Throckmorton document continue their journey here.
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 9 minutes later, 14 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,139
@previous (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
Fine but just know that he's going to completely flood the board with this bullshit. He'll have a separate thread for every part of the dumb script he's got mapped out for the next 3 months. "Fora, I've met a beautiful Russian peasant girl!" "Fora, I've got her pregnant!" "Fora, I had dinner with the Russian mafia last night!" It'll be his China nonsense transfered over to Russia and run into the ground all over again. But, as you wish.
Fine but just know that he's going to completely flood the board with this bullshit. He'll have a separate thread for every part of the dumb script he's got mapped out for the next 3 months. "Fora, I've met a beautiful Russian peasant girl!" "Fora, I've got her pregnant!" "Fora, I had dinner with the Russian mafia last night!" It'll be his China nonsense transfered over to Russia and run into the ground all over again. But, as you wish.
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 26 minutes later, 14 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,140
@previous (H)
New users deserve a chance to prove they cannot use the forum responsibly before we lock their threads.
New users deserve a chance to prove they cannot use the forum responsibly before we lock their threads.
Anonymous J joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 33 minutes later, 15 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,144
Anonymous K joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 21 minutes later, 15 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,145
The Butthurt Is Real replied with this 4 months ago, 9 minutes later, 15 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,146
Yes it is. This thread now reeks in major butthurt!
Anonymous C replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 18 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,165
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 4 minutes later, 18 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,166
What an exhaust day of research! My assistant, Nastia, is great. She's really cute, too, and we get along well. She's one of those Russians with blond hair but slightly Asian eyes. We just finished dinner and a long conversation. Time for bed. Tomorrow, we'll be doing some field work. Good night, everyone!
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 12 minutes later, 18 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,167
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> We just finished dinner
Just FYI it was 05:15am in Norilsk when OP posted this 10 minutes ago.
I provide this info for the Chuckle Brother who gets triggered as fuck when I take OP's shtick seriously.
> We just finished dinner
Just FYI it was 05:15am in Norilsk when OP posted this 10 minutes ago.
I provide this info for the Chuckle Brother who gets triggered as fuck when I take OP's shtick seriously.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 9 minutes later, 18 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,168
@previous (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
"Just" is a relative term. We had a very late dinner, but I posted it super late.
"Just" is a relative term. We had a very late dinner, but I posted it super late.
Anonymous L joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 18 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,169
@1,272,167 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
If anyone really cared it would take about 10 seconds to google it.
If anyone really cared it would take about 10 seconds to google it.
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 19 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,170
The Butthurt Is Real replied with this 4 months ago, 5 minutes later, 19 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,171
So is the desire for attention.
Anonymous M joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 39 minutes later, 19 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,173
I hate Matt like I literally hate him. He annoys the fuck out of me.
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 8 minutes later, 19 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,175
@previous (M)
> I hate Matt like I literally hate him. He annoys the fuck out of me.
Lol! He's 2 months away from turning 50 and he's dealing with it as best he can. If spending those 2 months acting out a fantasy on Minichan stops him from killing himself then let's just let him do it.
> I hate Matt like I literally hate him. He annoys the fuck out of me.
Lol! He's 2 months away from turning 50 and he's dealing with it as best he can. If spending those 2 months acting out a fantasy on Minichan stops him from killing himself then let's just let him do it.
The Butthurt Is Real replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 19 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,176
Anonymous F replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 22 hours after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,184
@1,272,120 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
You weren't busy enough to not reply to me, you could have posted hand with open curtain blizzard.
You weren't busy enough to not reply to me, you could have posted hand with open curtain blizzard.
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,190
Holy crap, talk about triggered as fuck!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 22 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,191
Lunch was interesting and delicious: raw liver and fish! It comes frozen with a dipping powder. Research is going great, and Nastia and I are really getting along great. I suspect she might actually...well, nah. It's professional.
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 4 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,206
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Jokingly call her Princess Anastasia as a litmus test. If she likes it you're good to proceed. If she hates it, keep things professional.
Jokingly call her Princess Anastasia as a litmus test. If she likes it you're good to proceed. If she hates it, keep things professional.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 24 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,210
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 34 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,212
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Nastia is the short form of Anastasia. She will either be pleased you know that and that you recognise it's a royal name, or she'll be butthurt for being reminded that her ancestors were murderous bolsheviks... or she'll have a sense of humour about it.
Nastia is the short form of Anastasia. She will either be pleased you know that and that you recognise it's a royal name, or she'll be butthurt for being reminded that her ancestors were murderous bolsheviks... or she'll have a sense of humour about it.
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 25 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,215
@previous (J)
> she'll be butthurt for being reminded that her ancestors were murderous bolsheviks...
They were murdered BY Bolsheviks you berk. Her ancestors were royalty, the polar opposite of Bolsheviks.
> she'll be butthurt for being reminded that her ancestors were murderous bolsheviks...
They were murdered BY Bolsheviks you berk. Her ancestors were royalty, the polar opposite of Bolsheviks.
Anonymous B replied with this 4 months ago, 46 seconds later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,216
dw !p9hU6ckyqw replied with this 4 months ago, 44 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,218
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,224
@1,272,215 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
Jeez you are retarded. What part of what I just said made you leap to the conclusion that I think the Romanovs weren't murdered by Bolsheviks?
Or are you saying it's unprecedented that a descendant of a bolshevik might name their daughter Nastia (one of the most common / popular female names in Russia) despite not having any royal connections?
Lol, you muppet.
Jeez you are retarded. What part of what I just said made you leap to the conclusion that I think the Romanovs weren't murdered by Bolsheviks?
Or are you saying it's unprecedented that a descendant of a bolshevik might name their daughter Nastia (one of the most common / popular female names in Russia) despite not having any royal connections?
Lol, you muppet.
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 43 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,228
@previous (J)
> What part of what I just said made you leap to the conclusion that I think the Romanovs weren't murdered by Bolsheviks?
The part I quoted you berk.
Now you go have yourself a blessed day my child.
> What part of what I just said made you leap to the conclusion that I think the Romanovs weren't murdered by Bolsheviks?
The part I quoted you berk.
Now you go have yourself a blessed day my child.
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 14 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,231
@previous (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
> The part I quoted you berk.
You have very poor reading and comprehension skills then. Never mind. We can't all be intellectuals.
> Now you go have yourself a blessed day, sir.
I shall! Thanks, lad. :)
> The part I quoted you berk.
You have very poor reading and comprehension skills then. Never mind. We can't all be intellectuals.
> Now you go have yourself a blessed day, sir.
I shall! Thanks, lad. :)
Anonymous L replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,232
He reminds you of a Chihuahua, obnoxious barking at everything for attention lol
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 34 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,238
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc double-posted this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,239
Anonymous N joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 7 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,241
@1,272,191 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> I suspect she might actually...well, nah. It's professional.
God why do people assume romantic intent when someone is just nice
> I suspect she might actually...well, nah. It's professional.
God why do people assume romantic intent when someone is just nice
Cathabis !TGirlYJKXM joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 8 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,243
Tili-tili-bomZakroy glaza skoreye
Kto-to khodit za oknom
I stuchitsya v dveri
Tili-tili-bom
Krichit nochnaya ptitsa
On uzhe probralsya v dom
K tem, komu ne spitsya
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,244
@1,272,241 (N)
> >I suspect she might actually...well, nah. It's professional.
>
> God why do people assume romantic intent when someone is just nice
OP has not had many vaginas.
> >I suspect she might actually...well, nah. It's professional.
>
> God why do people assume romantic intent when someone is just nice
OP has not had many vaginas.
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 48 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,247
@1,272,243 (Cathabis !TGirlYJKXM)
Sir, this is about Russia. You might want to sit this one out and let the real men talk.
Sir, this is about Russia. You might want to sit this one out and let the real men talk.
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 24 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,248
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 22 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,249
@previous (J)
Oh I understand your statement. I just don't want him and any of his little girly armed wannabe women thinking they could control Russia better than we ca....
Wait a minute....
That's it!
Comrade, you've just given me an idea! Get me the White House now!
Oh I understand your statement. I just don't want him and any of his little girly armed wannabe women thinking they could control Russia better than we ca....
Wait a minute....
That's it!
Comrade, you've just given me an idea! Get me the White House now!
Cathabis !TGirlYJKXM replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,250
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,252
Cathabis !TGirlYJKXM replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,253
@previous (H)> Then what are you?
I've always been the kind of girl, that hid my face.
So afraid to tell the world, what I've got to say.
But I have this dream, bright inside of me.
I'm gonna let it show, it's time to let you know.
This is real, this is me.
I'm exactly where I'm suppose to be now.
Gonna let the light shine on me.
Now I've found who I am.
There's no way to hold it in.
No more hiding who I wanna be.
This is me.
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 23 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,255
Cathabis !TGirlYJKXM replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,256
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 11 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,257
@previous (Cathabis !TGirlYJKXM)
Sir, why do you keep posting a picture of some ugly dude that is not you?
Sir, why do you keep posting a picture of some ugly dude that is not you?
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,260
Well, this is awkward. Nastia kissed me during our research. It was unexpected. Now it feels awkward. Updates to come!
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,262
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Well, this is awkward. Nastia kissed me during our research. It was unexpected. Now it feels awkward. Updates to come!
Wow, you just posted at the exact time Matt posted in his trans thread:
https://minichan.net/topic/115136#reply_1272259
Also, it's 03:45 in the morning in Norilsk right now.
> Well, this is awkward. Nastia kissed me during our research. It was unexpected. Now it feels awkward. Updates to come!
Wow, you just posted at the exact time Matt posted in his trans thread:
https://minichan.net/topic/115136#reply_1272259
Also, it's 03:45 in the morning in Norilsk right now.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,264
@previous (H)
So? What do those facts have to do with anything? YOU also posted now. So you are Matt?
So? What do those facts have to do with anything? YOU also posted now. So you are Matt?
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,266
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Do you mind if I post a link to an obituary now in this thread?
Do you mind if I post a link to an obituary now in this thread?
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,267
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 5 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,268
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
It's on topic. It's an obituary of a person who died in Norilsk and I would like you to try and track down their gravestone. Can I post it now?
It's on topic. It's an obituary of a person who died in Norilsk and I would like you to try and track down their gravestone. Can I post it now?
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 53 seconds later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,269
@previous (H)
No thanks. I'm not here for genealogical research. My research is otherwise. Now, it's late, so good night.
No thanks. I'm not here for genealogical research. My research is otherwise. Now, it's late, so good night.
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,270
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Tell you what, I'll post it anyway (in about an hour) and then if you change your mind and have a bit of free time you can look up the gravestone. Good night!
Tell you what, I'll post it anyway (in about an hour) and then if you change your mind and have a bit of free time you can look up the gravestone. Good night!
Lynn replied with this 4 months ago, 13 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,271
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 19 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,273
@1,272,260 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Well, this is awkward. Nastia kissed me during our research.
As if we didn't see this one coming.
Keep going with your story Matt.
> Well, this is awkward. Nastia kissed me during our research.
As if we didn't see this one coming.
Keep going with your story Matt.
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 7 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,274
I don't know why he won't agree to take 5 minutes of his time to track down the grave of my distant relative Maria Elizaveta Millerina. Seems selfish of him.
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 29 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,277
@previous (H)
We can't figure out how he can't take 5 seconds to pull the curtains open, and snap a picture of the snowy outside world.
We can't figure out how he can't take 5 seconds to pull the curtains open, and snap a picture of the snowy outside world.
Cathabis !TGirlYJKXM replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,289
@1,272,257 (K)Not a sir. I have better things to do than explain the joke to you.
@1,272,271 (Lynn)
Not a Lynn.
Anonymous P joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 5 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,292
The Butthurt Is Real replied with this 4 months ago, 34 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,299
There is plenty of butthurt going around. Good...Good.
Anonymous Q joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 35 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,304
at least u arent in prag getting shot
fuk czechia, they want me to fly there twice to get citizenship
i should get it by birth fk those ppl.
@1,272,125 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
couldnt one fly there?
fuk czechia, they want me to fly there twice to get citizenship
i should get it by birth fk those ppl.
@1,272,125 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
couldnt one fly there?
(Edited 1 minute later.)
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 22 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,308
@previous (Q)
> couldnt one fly there?
Sure (it'd take about 18 hours because you'd still need to make an epic journey by bus or taxi from the nearest airport to Norilsk) but Matt said he took the train, and made the 3000km journey (more than the entire width of Europe) in less than a single morning.
I provide this info for the Chuckle Brother who gets triggered as fuck when I take OP's shtick seriously.
> couldnt one fly there?
Sure (it'd take about 18 hours because you'd still need to make an epic journey by bus or taxi from the nearest airport to Norilsk) but Matt said he took the train, and made the 3000km journey (more than the entire width of Europe) in less than a single morning.
I provide this info for the Chuckle Brother who gets triggered as fuck when I take OP's shtick seriously.
Father Chuckle !u5oFWxmY7U replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,313
Anonymous F replied with this 4 months ago, 7 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,314
Throckmorton, why won't you post open-palm blizzard?
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 13 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,315
@1,272,308 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
He's so upset he didn't get a reaction from a chuckle brother or anyone else he posted this again. Good, good.
He's so upset he didn't get a reaction from a chuckle brother or anyone else he posted this again. Good, good.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,321
Today's research was very productive. Even so, my Russian assistant Nastia has been flirting so hard that I can scarce resist her. She kissed me again today, and, I must confess, I gave in and passionately kissed her back. I think I might be falling in love, which is very bad for my professionality.
Caveatipse joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 3 hours later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,338
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Will this local, independent, starving artist receive a Christmas miracle from a patron of the arts? We shall see!
Will this local, independent, starving artist receive a Christmas miracle from a patron of the arts? We shall see!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,339
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,354
@1,272,269 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Now, it's late, so good night.
13 hours ago, 04:00am Norilsk time - "I'm going to bed now"
@1,272,321 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Today's research was very productive.
7 hours later, 11:00am Norilsk time: "I have slept and conducted another day's work"
> Now, it's late, so good night.
13 hours ago, 04:00am Norilsk time - "I'm going to bed now"
@1,272,321 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Today's research was very productive.
7 hours later, 11:00am Norilsk time: "I have slept and conducted another day's work"
Anonymous H double-posted this 4 months ago, 55 seconds later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,355
@1,272,339 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> What??
Now that you've finished work, will you hunt for the grave of Maria Elizaveta Millerina today please?
> What??
Now that you've finished work, will you hunt for the grave of Maria Elizaveta Millerina today please?
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 19 hours later, 3 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,454
It happened -- the inevitable. Today, during research, Nastia came on to me again, and we made love. This is not good. It is unprofessional. She assures me that we can be lovers and she will not mention to any of my superiors. I certainly hope so. Otherwise, the research is going great.
Anonymous S joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 3 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,458
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Right on schedule.
@1,272,139 (H)
> Fine but just know that he's going to completely flood the board with this bullshit. He'll have a separate thread for every part of the dumb script he's got mapped out for the next 3 months. "Fora, I've met a beautiful Russian peasant girl!" "Fora, I've got her pregnant!" "Fora, I had dinner with the Russian mafia last night!" It'll be his China nonsense transfered over to Russia and run into the ground all over again. But, as you wish.
Right on schedule.
@1,272,139 (H)
> Fine but just know that he's going to completely flood the board with this bullshit. He'll have a separate thread for every part of the dumb script he's got mapped out for the next 3 months. "Fora, I've met a beautiful Russian peasant girl!" "Fora, I've got her pregnant!" "Fora, I had dinner with the Russian mafia last night!" It'll be his China nonsense transfered over to Russia and run into the ground all over again. But, as you wish.
Anonymous Q replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 3 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,463
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 3 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,467
@1,272,454 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Come on damn.... Get going with how the Russians started attacking your area and you're forced to flee.
Come on damn.... Get going with how the Russians started attacking your area and you're forced to flee.
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 29 minutes later, 3 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,468
@previous (K)
> Come on damn.... Get going with how the Russians started attacking your area and you're forced to flee.
He's saving that plot point for February. He's got to stretch this out to past his 50th birthday so he doesn't kill himself. Next will come "Nastia's" pregnancy, fucking her in the ass, the violent husband she didn't tell him about, and her pleading to be rescued and brought home to the States. It's the exact same story as that Chinese girl's identity he stole off Facebook. This is what happens when your imagination is so limited you need AI to write shitty vampire books that nobody reads.
> Come on damn.... Get going with how the Russians started attacking your area and you're forced to flee.
He's saving that plot point for February. He's got to stretch this out to past his 50th birthday so he doesn't kill himself. Next will come "Nastia's" pregnancy, fucking her in the ass, the violent husband she didn't tell him about, and her pleading to be rescued and brought home to the States. It's the exact same story as that Chinese girl's identity he stole off Facebook. This is what happens when your imagination is so limited you need AI to write shitty vampire books that nobody reads.
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 38 minutes later, 3 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,469
The Butthurt Is Real joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 3 hours later, 3 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,472
This so good to see. Matt has the butthurt flowing through so many of you weak minded pussies.
I love it.
I love it.
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 3 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,473
Poor Nastya's first post was deleted in a rage by a cruel mod. That's not very welcoming of you to new users.
Anonymous F replied with this 4 months ago, 13 minutes later, 3 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,474
Anonymous Q replied with this 4 months ago, 5 hours later, 3 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,486
@previous (F)
theres a little child running round this house
and it never leaves he wont ever leave
and the fog comes out
of the sewers and glows in the dark
its first there is fog and then there fog
theres a little child running round this house
and it never leaves he wont ever leave
and the fog comes out
of the sewers and glows in the dark
its first there is fog and then there fog
(Edited 4 minutes later.)
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 8 hours later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,539
Nastia and I are a couple now, I think. She said that our relationship is no big deal and that we won't get in trouble. She said it's normal here. So, I am giddy! I really think I'm in love. The research is going great as well. I am confident that I'll be able to publish a paper on the research! Also, I'm getting used to Norilsk life and culture. Merry Christmas as well!!!
Anonymous U joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,543
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,544
Anonymous M replied with this 4 months ago, 9 hours later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,600
Reported to FSB. Sent them your name, address, and details about your family’s past dealings with the enemy.
Anonymous F replied with this 4 months ago, 8 hours later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,632
@1,272,539 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Merry Christmas! Post a photo of your Google maps with the blue dot visible in Russia!
Merry Christmas! Post a photo of your Google maps with the blue dot visible in Russia!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 15 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,636
Oh no. I’m in trouble. Turns out Nastia is a spy for Putin! My research uncovered something very sensitive to Russia and she turned me in! I am in detention now. I have a hearing before a judge tomorrow!!!
Anonymous P replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,637
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
And they granted you internet access to post here? Wow, that was generous.
And they granted you internet access to post here? Wow, that was generous.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 53 seconds later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,638
Syntax Clause replied with this 4 months ago, 12 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,648
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 10 minutes later, 4 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,653
Syntax Clause replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,681
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
You do know that if they throw you in a prison over there your butthole will be turned into a vulva!!
You do know that if they throw you in a prison over there your butthole will be turned into a vulva!!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 4 hours later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,695
Oh, God! I did not have my hearing. The judge came into my holding cell and told me that I am found guilty of espionage and that I am sentenced to life in a gulag! I will leave tomorrow for the gulag! Please, help me!
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 5 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,699
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 14 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,700
@1,272,695 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Oh, God! I did not have my hearing. The judge came into my holding cell and told me that I am found guilty of espionage and that I am sentenced to life in a gulag! I will leave tomorrow for the gulag! Please, help me!
It is Christmas morning and OP is approaching 50. 50.
> Oh, God! I did not have my hearing. The judge came into my holding cell and told me that I am found guilty of espionage and that I am sentenced to life in a gulag! I will leave tomorrow for the gulag! Please, help me!
It is Christmas morning and OP is approaching 50. 50.
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 18 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,705
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,708
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 7 hours later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,740
@1,272,695 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Well it was nice knowing you. The forum will be worse off without your posts but sometimes life just isn't fair.
Well it was nice knowing you. The forum will be worse off without your posts but sometimes life just isn't fair.
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 30 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,741
@previous (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
Steady on, he's not even finished Act 1 yet. We've still got the daring gulag-break to come!
Steady on, he's not even finished Act 1 yet. We've still got the daring gulag-break to come!
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 5 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,742
@previous (H)
I can't wait to see how this ordinary Ohio-based egyptilogy professor manages to escape from a Siberian penal colony in a day or two.
I can't wait to see how this ordinary Ohio-based egyptilogy professor manages to escape from a Siberian penal colony in a day or two.
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 9 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,743
Will he exact revenge on Nastia for her betrayal? Will she atone for her treachery by helping him break out? And what will become of their unborn baby?
Stay tuned as we approach the season 1 finale of An Egyptologist in Siberia.
Stay tuned as we approach the season 1 finale of An Egyptologist in Siberia.
Syntax Clause replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,744
He may escape but his butthole will pay the price! Will he admit to having a vulva to shit thru after his escape? Stay tuned........
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 8 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,745
Maybe it'll be like Shawshank Redemption. Matt will crawl through a tunnel of shit to escape. Only in his case it'll be by choice, because he could have just jumped the fence.
Anonymous M replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,750
@1,272,700 (H)
> > Oh, God! I did not have my hearing. The judge came into my holding cell and told me that I am found guilty of espionage and that I am sentenced to life in a gulag! I will leave tomorrow for the gulag! Please, help me!
> It is Christmas morning and OP is approaching 50. 50.
It was cooler when he earnestly tried to convince us he really was an Inuit professor in Ohio who wasn’t Matt but then he realized it was untenable and just reverted to completely outrageous shtick
> > Oh, God! I did not have my hearing. The judge came into my holding cell and told me that I am found guilty of espionage and that I am sentenced to life in a gulag! I will leave tomorrow for the gulag! Please, help me!
> It is Christmas morning and OP is approaching 50. 50.
It was cooler when he earnestly tried to convince us he really was an Inuit professor in Ohio who wasn’t Matt but then he realized it was untenable and just reverted to completely outrageous shtick
Anonymous V joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,760
Anonymous W joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 10 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,761
FUCK THE JEWS
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 50 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,762
Well, I am in the gulag now. I get my work assignment soon. Life sentence. The accommodations are wretched. I will absolutely have to escape! Mark my words, I will not spend the rest of my life in the gulag!
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 32 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,765
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Well, I am in the gulag now. I get my work assignment soon. Life sentence. The accommodations are wretched. I will absolutely have to escape! Mark my words, I will not spend the rest of my life in the gulag!
Cut your plums off, darken your skin and start calling yourself Madeline, Biden will personally negotiate to have you swapped for a Chechen biological weapons dealer currently sitting on death row for selling anthrax to American preschoolers.
And get some sleep for heaven's sake, you've been posting all through the long Siberian night.
> Well, I am in the gulag now. I get my work assignment soon. Life sentence. The accommodations are wretched. I will absolutely have to escape! Mark my words, I will not spend the rest of my life in the gulag!
Cut your plums off, darken your skin and start calling yourself Madeline, Biden will personally negotiate to have you swapped for a Chechen biological weapons dealer currently sitting on death row for selling anthrax to American preschoolers.
And get some sleep for heaven's sake, you've been posting all through the long Siberian night.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 13 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,766
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,769
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Just a heads up in case you get writer's block in the next few days - Russia forces its penal colony inmates to fight in Ukraine. Could be an interesting plot twist.
Just a heads up in case you get writer's block in the next few days - Russia forces its penal colony inmates to fight in Ukraine. Could be an interesting plot twist.
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,770
Anonymous X joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 16 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,774
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,775
@previous (X)
As I said above, they let me use my phone because I'm a foreigner, but it's heavily monitored.
As I said above, they let me use my phone because I'm a foreigner, but it's heavily monitored.
Anonymous Z-1 joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 57 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,781
The Stickler replied with this 4 months ago, 5 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,782
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,785
@1,272,781 (Z-1)
@previous (The Stickler)
It's implied. Obviously if he is a Siberian labor camp and still posting here they let him keep his phone. Also the cell reception there is probably a bit spotty so not every post sent goes through necessarily.
@previous (The Stickler)
It's implied. Obviously if he is a Siberian labor camp and still posting here they let him keep his phone. Also the cell reception there is probably a bit spotty so not every post sent goes through necessarily.
(Edited 25 seconds later.)
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 31 minutes later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,786
So far, life here is extremely hard, but not unbearable. Because I'm a foreigner and they do not want me to die and create an international incident, I get double rations of food (still not that much food) and, while I have to work hard, it's not over the top "work until you die" kind of work. If it were a limited sentence, I could just bear down, do the time, and get on with my life. But because it's a life sentence, it is unbearable. I will escape. I already have a plan in the works.
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 21 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,787
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
What will you do if Nastia has gotten pregnant? What will you do if you later find out the child isn't yours?
What will you do if Nastia has gotten pregnant? What will you do if you later find out the child isn't yours?
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 52 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,788
Joshy replied with this 4 months ago, 49 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,789
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 4 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,790
Joshy replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,793
Meta !Sober//iZs joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 7 hours later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,830
@1,272,786 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
It was nice of them to let you keep your phone, a charger, and your data plan!
It was nice of them to let you keep your phone, a charger, and your data plan!
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 39 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,831
@previous (Meta !Sober//iZs)
Being sentenced to life in a siberian gulag after a one day show trial is one thing. Taking away someone's phone is a completely different level of evil never before known to man.
Being sentenced to life in a siberian gulag after a one day show trial is one thing. Taking away someone's phone is a completely different level of evil never before known to man.
Meta !Sober//iZs replied with this 4 months ago, 7 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,832
@previous (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
Apparently they found that Navalny guy in an Arctic prison - maybe Throckmorton will be his roommate now?
Apparently they found that Navalny guy in an Arctic prison - maybe Throckmorton will be his roommate now?
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,833
@previous (Meta !Sober//iZs)
Do you think the USA would risk a prisoner exchange like they did for that basketball dude?
Do you think the USA would risk a prisoner exchange like they did for that basketball dude?
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,834
@1,272,832 (Meta !Sober//iZs)
They can plan a daring escape together along with the extremely real FSB agent Nastia.
They can plan a daring escape together along with the extremely real FSB agent Nastia.
Joshy replied with this 4 months ago, 38 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,837
Meta !Sober//iZs replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,838
Meta !Sober//iZs double-posted this 4 months ago, 57 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,840
Actually Throckmorton is an Inuit so the Injuns would have to have a big pow-wow in front of the Kremlin to get him released.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,847
Well, looks like my work unit will be specializing in manufacturing tank armor for the Russian armor. There's really nothing to it once you learn the process, but they have me working at the foundry near the molten steel, and it's way too hot for comfort. Luckily, because I am a foreigner, I get plenty of water, but my Russian comrades get less, so I sneak them some when I can. Poor bastards. Every day is the same here. We don't get says off except once in a while, and those are spent sleeping since they work us to exhaustion. I feel bad getting special treatment, but they don't want an American citizen to die on their watch. I keep asking to talk to an embassy, but they refuse. I will keep trying. Chin up, comrades.
Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,858
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,859
@1,272,847 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Post your full name. I have a friend who works in the Canadian consular services. My brother actually works in the US State Department, so through whichever country you want I can send your info on to them.
Post your full name. I have a friend who works in the Canadian consular services. My brother actually works in the US State Department, so through whichever country you want I can send your info on to them.
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 5 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,861
@1,272,847 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Well, looks like my work unit will be specializing in manufacturing tank armor for the Russian armor. There's really nothing to it once you learn the process, but they have me working at the foundry near the molten steel, and it's way too hot for comfort. Luckily, because I am a foreigner, I get plenty of water, but my Russian comrades get less, so I sneak them some when I can. Poor bastards. Every day is the same here. We don't get says off except once in a while, and those are spent sleeping since they work us to exhaustion. I feel bad getting special treatment, but they don't want an American citizen to die on their watch. I keep asking to talk to an embassy, but they refuse. I will keep trying. Chin up, comrades.
Get some rest man, it was 4am in Norilsk when you posted this!
> Well, looks like my work unit will be specializing in manufacturing tank armor for the Russian armor. There's really nothing to it once you learn the process, but they have me working at the foundry near the molten steel, and it's way too hot for comfort. Luckily, because I am a foreigner, I get plenty of water, but my Russian comrades get less, so I sneak them some when I can. Poor bastards. Every day is the same here. We don't get says off except once in a while, and those are spent sleeping since they work us to exhaustion. I feel bad getting special treatment, but they don't want an American citizen to die on their watch. I keep asking to talk to an embassy, but they refuse. I will keep trying. Chin up, comrades.
Get some rest man, it was 4am in Norilsk when you posted this!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 15 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,862
@1,272,858 (Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w)
I've said many times that I am from Canada, but immigrated to the US and became a citizen.
I've said many times that I am from Canada, but immigrated to the US and became a citizen.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) double-posted this 4 months ago, 23 seconds later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,863
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 5 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,864
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> They work us hard, as I said.
All the more reason to get some rest when you're not working, instead of posting on here. It's 05:30 in Norilsk now!
> They work us hard, as I said.
All the more reason to get some rest when you're not working, instead of posting on here. It's 05:30 in Norilsk now!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,865
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,866
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Sounds like a dangerously inefficient and self-sabotaging way to operate a workforce to manufacture tank armour during a time of war, but I guess the Kremlin knows best! Keep your chin up.
Sounds like a dangerously inefficient and self-sabotaging way to operate a workforce to manufacture tank armour during a time of war, but I guess the Kremlin knows best! Keep your chin up.
Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w replied with this 4 months ago, 27 seconds later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,867
@1,272,865 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
When will you escape? This chapter is boring.
When will you escape? This chapter is boring.
(Edited 45 seconds later.)
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,868
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,869
@1,272,867 (Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w)
> When will you escape? This chapter is boring.
I agree with this by the way, this part is dragging. Get to the escape and the revenge on the double-crossing and newly-pregnant Nastia.
> When will you escape? This chapter is boring.
I agree with this by the way, this part is dragging. Get to the escape and the revenge on the double-crossing and newly-pregnant Nastia.
Anonymous H double-posted this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,870
@1,272,868 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Do you know anything about the gulags?
Yes, I have a degree in gulags from the University of Gulag Studies. I once spent 10 years in China teaching gulags to preschoolers and post-graduates. Thanks.
> Do you know anything about the gulags?
Yes, I have a degree in gulags from the University of Gulag Studies. I once spent 10 years in China teaching gulags to preschoolers and post-graduates. Thanks.
Anonymous Z-3 joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 11 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,871
Meta !Sober//iZs replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,873
@previous (Z-3)
> Apparently they give prisoners Internet access.
Is this how they interfered in the 2016 election?! 😂
> Apparently they give prisoners Internet access.
Is this how they interfered in the 2016 election?! 😂
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 24 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,877
@1,272,865 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Post your full name. I have a friend who works in the Canadian consular services. My brother actually works in the US State Department, so through whichever country you want I can send your info on to them.
Post your full name. I have a friend who works in the Canadian consular services. My brother actually works in the US State Department, so through whichever country you want I can send your info on to them.
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 47 minutes later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,887
@1,272,871 (Z-3)
> Apparently they give prisoners Internet access.
It's a Russian tradition to have suspected American spies build Russian tanks during a time of war while allowing them "monitored" 24/7 internet access to post about it all.
> Apparently they give prisoners Internet access.
It's a Russian tradition to have suspected American spies build Russian tanks during a time of war while allowing them "monitored" 24/7 internet access to post about it all.
Anonymous H double-posted this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,888
@1,272,877 (Glimmer of Hope)
> Post your full name. I have a friend who works in the Canadian consular services. My brother actually works in the US State Department, so through whichever country you want I can send your info on to them.
His fake CIA name is Matvey Rostislav Millerin. His arrest is all over today's Russian media. The authorities are still trying to ascertain his real name.
> Post your full name. I have a friend who works in the Canadian consular services. My brother actually works in the US State Department, so through whichever country you want I can send your info on to them.
His fake CIA name is Matvey Rostislav Millerin. His arrest is all over today's Russian media. The authorities are still trying to ascertain his real name.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 6 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,933
Wow, today's tough. The guards beat me earlier, but when I told them I am a US citizen, they apologized. So, a fellow prisoner slipped me a note today. I can read a little Russian, but not this. I have no idea what it says. I'm not sure what to do. Does anyone here read Russian well?
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 16 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,938
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 30 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,940
@1,272,933 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Because you're just a troublemaker trying to get my name. Sorry, but I'm not stupid.
Because you're just a troublemaker trying to get my name. Sorry, but I'm not stupid.
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,942
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
You have a life sentence in a Siberian work camp. What do you have to lose?
You have a life sentence in a Siberian work camp. What do you have to lose?
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,943
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 36 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,944
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
You have a life sentence in a Siberian work camp. What do you have to lose?
You have a life sentence in a Siberian work camp. What do you have to lose?
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,945
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,946
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 30 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,948
@1,272,945 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
I believe that mentally handicapped man who calls himself Father Dave can read Russian.
I believe that mentally handicapped man who calls himself Father Dave can read Russian.
Anonymous P replied with this 4 months ago, 46 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,952
@1,272,933 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> I have no idea what it says.
It says: "I'm gettin' ya outta here. I ain't forgot what ya done fer Mary an' the kids."
Or words to that effect.
> I have no idea what it says.
It says: "I'm gettin' ya outta here. I ain't forgot what ya done fer Mary an' the kids."
Or words to that effect.
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,973
@1,272,933 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Wow, today's tough. The guards beat me earlier, but when I told them I am a US citizen, they apologized. So, a fellow prisoner slipped me a note today. I can read a little Russian, but not this. I have no idea what it says. I'm not sure what to do. Does anyone here read Russian well?
Some editorial advice, the guards are MORE likely to have the shit kicked out of you if you're a Yank, not less likely.
And in the interests of hurrying along an increasingly dull section of the story, the note says "Meet me at the northern watchtower at midnight. My name's Dima". Now come on, get on with the escape.
> Wow, today's tough. The guards beat me earlier, but when I told them I am a US citizen, they apologized. So, a fellow prisoner slipped me a note today. I can read a little Russian, but not this. I have no idea what it says. I'm not sure what to do. Does anyone here read Russian well?
Some editorial advice, the guards are MORE likely to have the shit kicked out of you if you're a Yank, not less likely.
And in the interests of hurrying along an increasingly dull section of the story, the note says "Meet me at the northern watchtower at midnight. My name's Dima". Now come on, get on with the escape.
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,976
Today has been a strange day. My phone was confiscated by the guards because I had installed Subway Surfers for Alexei, my cellmate, to play. However, they gave me a new one back when I explained I was a US citizen.
Also, Nastya came to the gulag for a conjugal visit! I was so surprised! She is visibly pregnant now, with a big swollen belly. It made the visit awkward, but not impossible. She says she wants to marry me. I think I am in love, fora. I must escape this hellhole and reunite with my fiancée and unborn child!
Also, Nastya came to the gulag for a conjugal visit! I was so surprised! She is visibly pregnant now, with a big swollen belly. It made the visit awkward, but not impossible. She says she wants to marry me. I think I am in love, fora. I must escape this hellhole and reunite with my fiancée and unborn child!
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 7 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,977
@previous (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
> She is visibly pregnant now, with a big swollen belly.
Dude, you fucked her less than a week ago. There's no way that baby is yours. Now you should just kill her and escape.
> She is visibly pregnant now, with a big swollen belly.
Dude, you fucked her less than a week ago. There's no way that baby is yours. Now you should just kill her and escape.
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,978
@previous (K)
I asked her about that, and she said that people in Russia have evolved to be more efficient, due to the harshness of the environment. I asked Alexei and he confirmed it.
I asked her about that, and she said that people in Russia have evolved to be more efficient, due to the harshness of the environment. I asked Alexei and he confirmed it.
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 27 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,979
@previous (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
> I asked her about that, and she said that people in Russia have evolved to be more efficient
Can confirm.
Kudos also on the detail of the camp guards constantly forgetting who you are no matter how many times a day they apologise for kicking the shit out of you. Russian prison guards are the dumbest fucks in the entire state apparatus so that was a nice and sorely-needed bit of realism.
Now get on with the breakout dammit! I'm looking forward to your being recaptured and offered a choice between execution or joining an elite Wagner unit for a daredevil (swashbuckling, you might say!) storming of Zelenskiy's palace. "The price for Nastia and the baby is Zelenskiy's head personally delivered to President Putin, Yankee scum". I can see it now.
> I asked her about that, and she said that people in Russia have evolved to be more efficient
Can confirm.
Kudos also on the detail of the camp guards constantly forgetting who you are no matter how many times a day they apologise for kicking the shit out of you. Russian prison guards are the dumbest fucks in the entire state apparatus so that was a nice and sorely-needed bit of realism.
Now get on with the breakout dammit! I'm looking forward to your being recaptured and offered a choice between execution or joining an elite Wagner unit for a daredevil (swashbuckling, you might say!) storming of Zelenskiy's palace. "The price for Nastia and the baby is Zelenskiy's head personally delivered to President Putin, Yankee scum". I can see it now.
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,980
For the last hour I have been having deep discussions with Alexei. He says he is an important figure in the Russian Rebellion and he has been planning a breakout for months, but the thing stopping him was that he doesn't know how to use the dog sled that has been smuggled to him! He showed me a hole he was digging in the snow underneath his bed, and he has promised that if I use my Inuit experience to drive the dog sled, he will allow me to join him in a daring escape across Siberia! I vow I shall return to Norilsk and save Nastya, and recover my ancient Egyptian artifacts I was forced to abandon!
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 15 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,983
@1,272,979 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
> Russian prison guards are the dumbest fucks in the entire state apparatus
I take it you are speaking from your own personal experience in prison.
> Russian prison guards are the dumbest fucks in the entire state apparatus
I take it you are speaking from your own personal experience in prison.
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 35 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,986
@previous (J)> > Russian prison guards are the dumbest fucks in the entire state apparatus
> I take it you are speaking from your own personal experience in prison.
Yes, I spent 4 years in a labour camp in Noyabrask.
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,988
@1,272,980 (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
> He showed me a hole he was digging in the snow underneath his bed
Are you, praytell, sleeping outside?
> He showed me a hole he was digging in the snow underneath his bed
Are you, praytell, sleeping outside?
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 48 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,989
@previous (K)
We are forced to sleep in double decker hammocks inside a metal cage with no solid ceiling or walls. It is truly a terrible situation!
We are forced to sleep in double decker hammocks inside a metal cage with no solid ceiling or walls. It is truly a terrible situation!
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 5 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,990
@previous (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
> We are forced to sleep in double decker hammocks inside a metal cage with no solid ceiling or walls. It is truly a terrible situation!
Stop being so dramatic, they're allowing you 24 hour WiFi access and conjugal visits with beautiful pregnant FSB agents. Stop demonising Russia, you'd have it way worse at San Quentin.
> We are forced to sleep in double decker hammocks inside a metal cage with no solid ceiling or walls. It is truly a terrible situation!
Stop being so dramatic, they're allowing you 24 hour WiFi access and conjugal visits with beautiful pregnant FSB agents. Stop demonising Russia, you'd have it way worse at San Quentin.
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 41 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,991
@1,272,989 (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
Just curious... What happens if your Chinese wife finds out about your Russian fiancee and her being pregnant?
Just curious... What happens if your Chinese wife finds out about your Russian fiancee and her being pregnant?
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 31 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,992
@previous (K)
> Just curious... What happens if your Chinese wife finds out about your Russian fiancee and her being pregnant?
Stay tuned for Season 2 to find out!
> Just curious... What happens if your Chinese wife finds out about your Russian fiancee and her being pregnant?
Stay tuned for Season 2 to find out!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 16 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,993
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) double-posted this 4 months ago, 24 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,272,994
Killer Lettuce🌹 !HonkUK.BIE joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,017
@1,272,993 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Thanks for clarifying that. Those posts were just silly and unbelievable. Really brought down the tone of this topic.
Anyway, please get back to telling us about your thrilling escape plan from the gulag. Glad you have your phone and WiFi access so we can follow along.
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Thanks for clarifying that. Those posts were just silly and unbelievable. Really brought down the tone of this topic.
Anyway, please get back to telling us about your thrilling escape plan from the gulag. Glad you have your phone and WiFi access so we can follow along.
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 17 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,024
@1,272,994 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,026
@previous (Glimmer of Hope)
It would be very rude to the staffers at the embassy to make them work extra during the holiday season.
It would be very rude to the staffers at the embassy to make them work extra during the holiday season.
Killer Lettuce🌹 !HonkUK.BIE replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,027
@previous (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
If I was in this crisis, I would certainly reach out to minichan.net instead of my country's embassy anyway. Who needs useless faggot ambassadors when I can have Fake anon and Dave from Russia!
If I was in this crisis, I would certainly reach out to minichan.net instead of my country's embassy anyway. Who needs useless faggot ambassadors when I can have Fake anon and Dave from Russia!
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 11 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,030
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 23 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,033
I've had a very long day dog sledding with Alexei. Siberia is beautiful, in a primitive and rugged way. There is a problem with food, however. Because we left in the night, we were unable to take very much with us. I am very hungry. I am ashamed to admit that I am starting to wonder if I should eat Alexei! What a terrible thought, that I should eat the person who helped me to escape from the Gulag! What do you think, friends? Should I eat him?
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,034
@previous (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 4 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,035
@previous (Glimmer of Hope)
Fine, it is because I am currently wanted on an international arrest warrant for stealing a mummy from the University of Toronto. Happy?
Fine, it is because I am currently wanted on an international arrest warrant for stealing a mummy from the University of Toronto. Happy?
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 15 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,036
@1,273,033 (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
> I've had a very long day dog sledding with Alexei. Siberia is beautiful, in a primitive and rugged way. There is a problem with food, however. Because we left in the night, we were unable to take very much with us. I am very hungry. I am ashamed to admit that I am starting to wonder if I should eat Alexei! What a terrible thought, that I should eat the person who helped me to escape from the Gulag! What do you think, friends? Should I eat him?
Honestly I think I prefer this plot direction to whatever OP had planned. I'll be following this.
> I've had a very long day dog sledding with Alexei. Siberia is beautiful, in a primitive and rugged way. There is a problem with food, however. Because we left in the night, we were unable to take very much with us. I am very hungry. I am ashamed to admit that I am starting to wonder if I should eat Alexei! What a terrible thought, that I should eat the person who helped me to escape from the Gulag! What do you think, friends? Should I eat him?
Honestly I think I prefer this plot direction to whatever OP had planned. I'll be following this.
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,038
@1,273,027 (Killer Lettuce🌹 !HonkUK.BIE)
Finally, an intelligent forum user shows up.
@1,273,030 (Glimmer of Hope)
Kwanzaa.
Finally, an intelligent forum user shows up.
@1,273,030 (Glimmer of Hope)
Kwanzaa.
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,039
@1,273,035 (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
Interesting. So you would rather spend the rest of your life in a Siberian labor camp than possibly 10-20 years in a Canadian prison?
Interesting. So you would rather spend the rest of your life in a Siberian labor camp than possibly 10-20 years in a Canadian prison?
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 5 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,040
@1,273,033 (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
@1,273,036 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
That's not me. "Plot direction"? I'm a prisoner in a Siberian gulag! This is no joking matter!
@1,273,036 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
That's not me. "Plot direction"? I'm a prisoner in a Siberian gulag! This is no joking matter!
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 27 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,041
Glimmer of Hope double-posted this 4 months ago, 32 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,042
@1,273,040 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 16 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,043
@1,273,040 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> That's not me. "Plot direction"?
Yes, you're dawdling too much in the 2nd act. Your rival there has introduced a cool little "choose your own adventure" angle that involves the audience. I'm far more invested in whether he'll cannibalise his dog sledding partner Alexei than I am in your tiresome prison guard beatings.
> That's not me. "Plot direction"?
Yes, you're dawdling too much in the 2nd act. Your rival there has introduced a cool little "choose your own adventure" angle that involves the audience. I'm far more invested in whether he'll cannibalise his dog sledding partner Alexei than I am in your tiresome prison guard beatings.
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 30 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,044
@1,273,040 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Who are you? Have the prison guards given you my phone? I am having to decide whether to kill and eat my best friend in all of Russia. Have a bit of compassion!
Who are you? Have the prison guards given you my phone? I am having to decide whether to kill and eat my best friend in all of Russia. Have a bit of compassion!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 48 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,045
@previous (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
You are my impersonator. Anyway, @1,273,043 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc) you can read Russian, right? Can you translate the note that was slipped to me yesterday if I post it?
You are my impersonator. Anyway, @1,273,043 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc) you can read Russian, right? Can you translate the note that was slipped to me yesterday if I post it?
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,046
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
Glimmer of Hope double-posted this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,047
@1,273,045 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,048
@1,273,045 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Anyway, @1,273,043 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc) you can read Russian, right? Can you translate the note that was slipped to me yesterday if I post it?
Yes I can, but if you have internet access, why not just run it through Google translate?
> Anyway, @1,273,043 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc) you can read Russian, right? Can you translate the note that was slipped to me yesterday if I post it?
Yes I can, but if you have internet access, why not just run it through Google translate?
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,049
For the attention of the forum, the supposed Throckmorton in @1,273,045 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg) is my Gulag nemesis, Dmitri Orlov, using my old phone and Minichan ID. I know this because Alexei told me that he had been asking the guards to give him my phone ever since I arrived. He is obviously just trying to cause trouble now. Please ensure you all respond to him with "Disappear, Dmitri" if he continues to try to derail my topic. I take pleasure that me and Alexei have escaped without you.
Anyway, we are going to sleep now. It is very cold so we are going to huddle together for warmth. I think for now I am not going to cannibalize him, because he is being very good to me, and I think the Russian Rebellion will be able to assist me in the future when I return to Norilsk to rescue Nastia and reclaim my Egyptian mummy. Goodnight!
Anyway, we are going to sleep now. It is very cold so we are going to huddle together for warmth. I think for now I am not going to cannibalize him, because he is being very good to me, and I think the Russian Rebellion will be able to assist me in the future when I return to Norilsk to rescue Nastia and reclaim my Egyptian mummy. Goodnight!
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 4 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,050
@previous (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
> For the attention of the forum, the supposed Throckmorton in @1,273,045 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg) is my Gulag nemesis, Dmitri Orlov, using my old phone and Minichan ID. I know this because Alexei told me that he had been asking the guards to give him my phone ever since I arrived. He is obviously just trying to cause trouble now. Please ensure you all respond to him with "Disappear, Dmitri" if he continues to try to derail my topic. I take pleasure that me and Alexei have escaped without you.
>
> Anyway, we are going to sleep now. It is very cold so we are going to huddle together for warmth. I think for now I am not going to cannibalize him, because he is being very good to me, and I think the Russian Rebellion will be able to assist me in the future when I return to Norilsk to rescue Nastia and reclaim my Egyptian mummy. Goodnight!
Best of luck!
> For the attention of the forum, the supposed Throckmorton in @1,273,045 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg) is my Gulag nemesis, Dmitri Orlov, using my old phone and Minichan ID. I know this because Alexei told me that he had been asking the guards to give him my phone ever since I arrived. He is obviously just trying to cause trouble now. Please ensure you all respond to him with "Disappear, Dmitri" if he continues to try to derail my topic. I take pleasure that me and Alexei have escaped without you.
>
> Anyway, we are going to sleep now. It is very cold so we are going to huddle together for warmth. I think for now I am not going to cannibalize him, because he is being very good to me, and I think the Russian Rebellion will be able to assist me in the future when I return to Norilsk to rescue Nastia and reclaim my Egyptian mummy. Goodnight!
Best of luck!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 12 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,053
@1,273,048 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)It is handwritten, and I don't know how to type Russian into Google. Here's an image of the note.
(Edited 17 seconds later.)
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 5 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,055
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
It says "I can be a friend to you. Midnight. Meet me in the showers"
It says "I can be a friend to you. Midnight. Meet me in the showers"
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 36 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,056
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,057
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 41 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,058
@1,273,053 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,059
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 36 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,060
@previous (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
The number of words. I don't know Russian, but I do know basically the structure and syntax.
The number of words. I don't know Russian, but I do know basically the structure and syntax.
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 13 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,062
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Counting words is silly. Russian frequently requires half the words that English uses. Now go meet him in the showers at midnight (and tell him to work on his Russian handwriting, it looks like a 6-year-old alcoholic with palsy wrote it!)
Counting words is silly. Russian frequently requires half the words that English uses. Now go meet him in the showers at midnight (and tell him to work on his Russian handwriting, it looks like a 6-year-old alcoholic with palsy wrote it!)
(Edited 1 minute later.)
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 7 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,063
@1,273,060 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
Fighting over fora attention replied with this 4 months ago, 30 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,064
yes it is lol
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 3 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,078
Well, today on work duty, a guard pulled me aside roughly. He took me into the guard office, where a very high-ranking Russian official who spoke perfect English told me that they had a deal for me. If I would agree to spy for Russia, then not only would they release me, but they would allow me a life of privilege and freedom in Russia with a very high salary. I am considering this. What do you think I should do?
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 15 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,079
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
What, precisely, would be worthless about contacting the US State Department or Canadian consular affairs about your emergency?
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 11 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,081
@previous (Glimmer of Hope)
You're not getting an answer so please let the very real events occurring here continue to play out.
@1,273,078 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Luckily you are a foreigner so they cannot stop you posting details about their attempts to recruit you as a spy on the internet under your real name. Stopping that would cause an international incident, which would ruin the pristine reputation Russian prison labor camps have around the world.
You're not getting an answer so please let the very real events occurring here continue to play out.
@1,273,078 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Luckily you are a foreigner so they cannot stop you posting details about their attempts to recruit you as a spy on the internet under your real name. Stopping that would cause an international incident, which would ruin the pristine reputation Russian prison labor camps have around the world.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,082
@previous (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
I am not posting my real name. I have decided to take the offer. I cannot bear the thought of a life sentence here. I suspect that this whole thing was designed to make me agree to be a spy. Well, I'm being released tomorrow and flown to Moscow first-class. I still resent Nastia, and, as a spy, I may have special means to get my...revenge.
I am not posting my real name. I have decided to take the offer. I cannot bear the thought of a life sentence here. I suspect that this whole thing was designed to make me agree to be a spy. Well, I'm being released tomorrow and flown to Moscow first-class. I still resent Nastia, and, as a spy, I may have special means to get my...revenge.
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 14 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,085
Glimmer of Hope replied with this 4 months ago, 56 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,093
@1,273,081 (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
I am trying to help and want to know why the most obvious course of action is not being pursued.
This is an entirely serious matter and you should excuse yourself from this thread if you aren't going to take it seriously.
I am trying to help and want to know why the most obvious course of action is not being pursued.
This is an entirely serious matter and you should excuse yourself from this thread if you aren't going to take it seriously.
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 3 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,115
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,116
@previous (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
> Lol you berk.
And my (correct) translation, as opposed to your atrociously bad one, gets you all riled up because... ?
> Lol you berk.
And my (correct) translation, as opposed to your atrociously bad one, gets you all riled up because... ?
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,119
@previous (J)
See:
@1,272,973 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
(his rendering of watchtower was as dodgy as the Russian handwriting but he played along gamely enough)
Now can we all take a minute to laugh at Anon J actually taking this seriously :)
See:
@1,272,973 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
(his rendering of watchtower was as dodgy as the Russian handwriting but he played along gamely enough)
Now can we all take a minute to laugh at Anon J actually taking this seriously :)
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc double-posted this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,120
@1,273,078 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Well, today on work duty, a guard pulled me aside roughly. He took me into the guard office, where a very high-ranking Russian official who spoke perfect English told me that they had a deal for me. If I would agree to spy for Russia, then not only would they release me, but they would allow me a life of privilege and freedom in Russia with a very high salary. I am considering this. What do you think I should do?
Better. Audience participation, like your rival is doing. It helps engage the reader.
> Well, today on work duty, a guard pulled me aside roughly. He took me into the guard office, where a very high-ranking Russian official who spoke perfect English told me that they had a deal for me. If I would agree to spy for Russia, then not only would they release me, but they would allow me a life of privilege and freedom in Russia with a very high salary. I am considering this. What do you think I should do?
Better. Audience participation, like your rival is doing. It helps engage the reader.
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,121
I am sorry that I haven't updated you all with events for a while. Me and Alexei had a fair-quality sleep. The temperatures are very cold. Alexei has unfortunately contracted frostbite on his nose-tip and his toes. They are very distressing to look at. It was a lot warmer sleeping in a pile with the dogs than it was sleeping on our double-decker hammock, and my hope is that by remaining warm for as long as possible, we can stop the frostbite. But of course, now we are in a race against time to find medical aid for Alexei!
I am typing this during a meal break. We can see smoke rising a few miles in the distance. Alexei says that it is most likely a bandit camp. Ordinarily I would never enter a bandit camp, but we are in a desperate situation. Wish me luck, friends! Throckmorton, out.
I am typing this during a meal break. We can see smoke rising a few miles in the distance. Alexei says that it is most likely a bandit camp. Ordinarily I would never enter a bandit camp, but we are in a desperate situation. Wish me luck, friends! Throckmorton, out.
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU double-posted this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,127
Man, we really got lucky. The smoke trail led us to a bandit hut, but there was only one dude there. Me and Alexei were able to subdue him with by using icicles as daggers, and we have been able to find food supplies as well as a satellite connection terminal - I have been able to phone Nastia!
This is where the good news comes to an end. She told me that a person who looked identical to me arrived in Moscow last night. I can see above that the imposter Dmitri Orlov is also landing in Moscow. So it's obvious what has happened... Dmitri has received plastic surgery to look like me and infiltrate Norilsk for some unknown reason. I have warned Nastia, who has agreed to stall Dmitri, and I am currently waiting for comrades of Alexei to get in touch with him so he can arrange a chopper to pick us up ASAP.
This is where the good news comes to an end. She told me that a person who looked identical to me arrived in Moscow last night. I can see above that the imposter Dmitri Orlov is also landing in Moscow. So it's obvious what has happened... Dmitri has received plastic surgery to look like me and infiltrate Norilsk for some unknown reason. I have warned Nastia, who has agreed to stall Dmitri, and I am currently waiting for comrades of Alexei to get in touch with him so he can arrange a chopper to pick us up ASAP.
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,131
@1,273,119 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
> See:
> (his rendering of watchtower was as dodgy as the Russian handwriting but he played along gamely enough)
Okay... :) (lol, I didn't bother to "See")
> Anon J actually taking this seriously :)
What makes you believe I'm taking this seriously?
You seem extremely irritated. Perhaps it's because of the growing number of responses to this thread, not originated by you. I detect jelly!
> See:
> (his rendering of watchtower was as dodgy as the Russian handwriting but he played along gamely enough)
Okay... :) (lol, I didn't bother to "See")
> Anon J actually taking this seriously :)
What makes you believe I'm taking this seriously?
You seem extremely irritated. Perhaps it's because of the growing number of responses to this thread, not originated by you. I detect jelly!
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 13 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,132
@previous (J)
> I'm irritated. Perhaps it's because of the growing number of responses to this thread
:)
> I'm irritated. Perhaps it's because of the growing number of responses to this thread
:)
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,136
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 16 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,138
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Disappear, Dmitri! Your tricks will not work on my beloved Nastia!
Disappear, Dmitri! Your tricks will not work on my beloved Nastia!
Anonymous J replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,139
@1,273,132 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
> I'm irritated. Perhaps it's because of the growing number of responses to this thread
I see. Tell us more about why you are irritated. :)
> I'm irritated. Perhaps it's because of the growing number of responses to this thread
I see. Tell us more about why you are irritated. :)
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 57 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,147
Oh God, this is terrible. I agree to be a Russian spy. I was flown out of Norilsk (And officially released from my sentence) on a luxury private jet, but somewhere in the middle of Sibera, it crashed! The wings had iced over, and although it was not a terrible crash, still, I and one Russian girl who was a guard at the gulag are the only survivors. It's so cold outside. We're in the plane for now, and it keeps us a bit warm, but the food rations are low. I see her eyeing the bodies of the other passengers, bodies preserved by the cold, but I cannot tolerate events thought of that right now. I am about to go hunting for Arctic hare to cook. We can build fires, so that helps a lot. I will keep you updated.
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 38 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,154
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Sometimes it just isn't your week. I am praying for your rescue.
Sometimes it just isn't your week. I am praying for your rescue.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,155
@previous (Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU)
Thank you. I managed to find a sole Arctic hare. I killed it mercifully and brought it back to the plane. Anastasia, the guard who survive the plane crash, seems suspicious of me. I feel resentment towards her since she was a gulag guard, but right now, we are two humans in a very deadly situation, and we need each other for survival. I'm going to cook the hare. Luckily, the plane's commissary still has some salt, pepper, and seasonings, so it will end up as a good, hot meal, even if it is not too much for two people. Anastasia keeps eyeing the bodies of the dead passengers, which frightens me. After we eat, I'm going to go out again in search of help. We are in the middle of Siberia, so I do not expect much.
Thank you. I managed to find a sole Arctic hare. I killed it mercifully and brought it back to the plane. Anastasia, the guard who survive the plane crash, seems suspicious of me. I feel resentment towards her since she was a gulag guard, but right now, we are two humans in a very deadly situation, and we need each other for survival. I'm going to cook the hare. Luckily, the plane's commissary still has some salt, pepper, and seasonings, so it will end up as a good, hot meal, even if it is not too much for two people. Anastasia keeps eyeing the bodies of the dead passengers, which frightens me. After we eat, I'm going to go out again in search of help. We are in the middle of Siberia, so I do not expect much.
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 38 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,159
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Anastasia and Nastya are the same name, the latter being the diminutive form of the former. Try to add more variety to the characters. You'll rarely find a great novel in which the 2 main characters are called William and Bill. Just some editorial advice, carry on and good luck!
Anastasia and Nastya are the same name, the latter being the diminutive form of the former. Try to add more variety to the characters. You'll rarely find a great novel in which the 2 main characters are called William and Bill. Just some editorial advice, carry on and good luck!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,160
@previous (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
I did not name them, and this is not a novel. This is my real life, and I'm panicking!
I did not name them, and this is not a novel. This is my real life, and I'm panicking!
Vladimir Putin replied with this 4 months ago, 29 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,166
У нас есть американец, который сбежал и находится в Сибири. Его необходимо найти и убить.
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 8 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,168
@1,273,160 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Just so people don't start to think your life is some kind of shoddy creative writing assignment, could you please change the names of one of them to something else like Katerina or Natalya?
Just so people don't start to think your life is some kind of shoddy creative writing assignment, could you please change the names of one of them to something else like Katerina or Natalya?
(Edited 45 minutes later.)
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 40 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,170
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,173
An update of sorts, we are still in the hut. Alexei has been speaking to his friend Leonid who promises that he is bringing a chopper to us, but so far there doesn't seem to be anything happening. I am beginning to worry that Alexei will die before Leonid can bring a helicopter to us. His frostbite has become very bad, and night has fallen. I have been examining the maps and I think that we should be able to reach Saskylakh and from there follow a road to a city with a rail station. Alexei was very angry when I suggested it. Can't he see that I need to save my beloved fiancée Nastia, and reclaim my Egyptian mummy? The imposter Dmitri Orlov is surely closing in on both. I cannot allow it!
Anonymous H replied with this 4 months ago, 9 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,177
@1,273,160 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> This is my real life, and I'm panicking!
I would be too if I were 49, almost 50.
> This is my real life, and I'm panicking!
I would be too if I were 49, almost 50.
Anonymous Q replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,180
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,187
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,189
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 51 seconds later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,191
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,192
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 52 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,200
@previous (U)
Why do you think I am going to prove some stupid shit to Minichan when I am facing starving to death in Siberia?
Why do you think I am going to prove some stupid shit to Minichan when I am facing starving to death in Siberia?
Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w replied with this 4 months ago, 56 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,207
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Is that like the time you were starving to death in a Chinese hospital?
Is that like the time you were starving to death in a Chinese hospital?
Jahn replied with this 4 months ago, 15 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,209
Hello my name is Jahn. I am enjoying your adventure Throckmorton. I use to live in Siberia. The place is awful. I pray you get out of there alive!Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 38 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,213
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) double-posted this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,245
I went out again for food and managed to captures three Arctic hares. I think, though, that I may have frostbite on a couple of toes. When I got back to the wrecked plane, Anastasia was there with a nice, warm, roaring fire. She looked happy and content. However, one of the bodies of the dead passengers was gone. Just gone. I am not sure what to think. I cooked the hares, but she refused, saying she was full.
Caveatipse joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,246
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Using Latin-based versus Anglo-Saxon WORDS in your HORROR writing!
Using Latin-based versus Anglo-Saxon WORDS in your HORROR writing!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 5 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,247
Anonymous F replied with this 4 months ago, 7 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,264
I am currently preparing to leave the hut. Alexei died last night. I am very upset. I tried to use the radio to contact Leonid but I came through to a woman called Maria who advised me that they could not pick me up... I think I was always going to be left behind and stranded here.
I've salvaged some of his winter clothing that is better than the stuff I'm wearing. I've left others. I have three days of food and I can melt snow to make water. My plan is to follow the river to a nearby rural settlement and hopefully, if it is not impassible, I should be able to use the winter road to reach a town with a rail connection.
I feel desolate, distraught. This is all because of that fucking mummy. If I had not stolen it, I would have never have had to flee to Russia. The only bright light on the horizon is my princess, my beloved Nastya. But even that is threatened. As I waste time here, the fake Throckmorton Dmitri Orlov is surely closing in on her location. And even if he doesn't fool her, I know that in Russia, plastic surgery is a highly advanced maskarova technique which has been perfected over decades. So he will easily fool my colleagues who will hand over the mummy to him.
I seriously need to get that mummy back! It's incredibly important to my Egyptology career!
I've salvaged some of his winter clothing that is better than the stuff I'm wearing. I've left others. I have three days of food and I can melt snow to make water. My plan is to follow the river to a nearby rural settlement and hopefully, if it is not impassible, I should be able to use the winter road to reach a town with a rail connection.
I feel desolate, distraught. This is all because of that fucking mummy. If I had not stolen it, I would have never have had to flee to Russia. The only bright light on the horizon is my princess, my beloved Nastya. But even that is threatened. As I waste time here, the fake Throckmorton Dmitri Orlov is surely closing in on her location. And even if he doesn't fool her, I know that in Russia, plastic surgery is a highly advanced maskarova technique which has been perfected over decades. So he will easily fool my colleagues who will hand over the mummy to him.
I seriously need to get that mummy back! It's incredibly important to my Egyptology career!
Anonymous Q replied with this 4 months ago, 28 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,265
always thought it was funny that ppls name was literally nasty-a
i told my floormate who was from russia and she didnt get it
weirdo
@1,272,308 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
high speed rail :p
i told my floormate who was from russia and she didnt get it
weirdo
@1,272,308 (Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc)
high speed rail :p
(Edited 3 minutes later.)
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 5 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,288
I cannot deny it any longer and must simply admit the truth: Anastasia is cannibalizing the bodies of the dead passengers. This morning, I found a pile of human bones near her, and she always refuses the Arcic hares I catch and cook. I fear for my own life now. I am the freshest of meat. Tonight, I plan to make my escape while she sleeps. The plane's wrecked fuselage offers shelter, but I cannot stay here forever, especially with an active cannibal. I plan to steal all the supplies I can and trek off into Siberia in the hope of finding help. Wish me luck.
Anonymous P replied with this 4 months ago, 4 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,309
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Ask the admins to confirm that your IP is located somewhere in Siberia.
Ask the admins to confirm that your IP is located somewhere in Siberia.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 3 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,329
I did it. While Anastasia the cannibal slept, I stole all the supplies and sneaked off into the night. I am not trekking through the wilds of Siberia. When the wind comes in the night, I dig a hole in the snow, cover it with brush, and sleep. Sometimes, I build a fire when I can find kindling. I believe I might have spotted something in the distance. More to come.
Anonymous P replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,332
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> I am not trekking through the wilds of Siberia.
I believe you.
> I am not trekking through the wilds of Siberia.
I believe you.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 16 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,334
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,338
It's a good thing OP isn't an author, because this is one of the most boring and uninspired stories I've read in quite some time.
Anonymous Q replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,382
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 7 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,411
I've arrived in the town of Kirensk. I won't recap what the journey was like, because as you can imagine over 24 hours of non-stop dog sledding in -45 degrees celcius was insanely hellish. I am meeting with a person tomorrow who says he is going to be able to arrange air travel to the nearest air field to Norilsk. I'm bringing the dogs with me so we can make the journey to the city after we arrive. Nastya called me. Dmitri has not arrived there yet, so I may have an advantage. I will have to figure out how to enter the city, get past the guards at the compound, and reclaim my property and my beloved fiancée Nastya and my newborn child. That's right, friends! I am a father to a little baby Russian boy! I have asked Nastya to name him Paul after my grandfather and we came to the agreement that his name shall be Pavel Tonraqevich Throckmorton-Agopov. I can't wait to meet you, Pavel!
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU double-posted this 4 months ago, 4 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,412
Throckmorton, this is your future self. I have managed to momentarily break the seals. I do not have long. Please remember this: do NOT enter the cave system at Dyatlov Pass! I repeat, do NOT enter the cave system! I know the choice will be hard, but you must listen! The winds are picking up. You will understand. I must post now before I am blown back to my time. Good luck.
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU triple-posted this 4 months ago, 1 minute later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,413
@previous (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
What the fuck? This person has my ID and tripcode? How? Admin, can you investigate?
What the fuck? This person has my ID and tripcode? How? Admin, can you investigate?
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 11 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,458
Oh, the gods have smiled down upon me! As I trekked across the vast Siberian wasteland in the snow and cold, I spotted something in the distance -- smoke! I went to it and found a small village of native Siberians who call themselves the Chukotko-Kamchatkan people. Their language is strange to me, but we can get by with hand gestures. They have fed me and taken me inside one of their igloo-like structures where it is warm! Thank the gods, warm, I tell you! I plan to sleep and rest for a while, then see if they can help me reach a city.
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 15 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,459
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Do you want any of us to contact the US Department of State? It seems a bit silly to do these life threatening treks for no reason.
Do you want any of us to contact the US Department of State? It seems a bit silly to do these life threatening treks for no reason.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,460
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 9 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,463
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Why wouldn't they be able to find you? You have internet access.
Why wouldn't they be able to find you? You have internet access.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 40 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,464
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,468
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Satellite phone? You're in luck! Satellite phones are MORE traceable, not less. Triangulating signals was one of the main reasons for developing the technology.
Satellite phone? You're in luck! Satellite phones are MORE traceable, not less. Triangulating signals was one of the main reasons for developing the technology.
TEE GEE COMICS joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,489
WHAT AFFECTS A WRITER'S style?
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 6 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,509
You really should know the difference between TONE and MOOD in your writing.
You should also know the IMPORTANCE of your characters background.
You have failed miserably on these, and thus, your story has taken a rock bottom crash.
You should also know the IMPORTANCE of your characters background.
You have failed miserably on these, and thus, your story has taken a rock bottom crash.
Anonymous K double-posted this 4 months ago, 2 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,510
@1,273,464 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> No I don't. It's a satellite phone, and it's spotty.
Earlier on you said you had a cellphone and internet service.
Where, exactly, did this "satellite phone" magically appear from?
Changing your story makes you appear as a.... I don't know... A liar?
> No I don't. It's a satellite phone, and it's spotty.
Earlier on you said you had a cellphone and internet service.
Where, exactly, did this "satellite phone" magically appear from?
Changing your story makes you appear as a.... I don't know... A liar?
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 26 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,511
I've arrived at the air field, and I'm preparing to set out to Norilsk. It's actually a very difficult journey due to the terrain, but using dogs instead of a heavy motor vehicle helps maintain a good pace, so I estimate I'll arrive at the border of the city in about four hours. I'll update you all what happens after I rescue Nastya and the mummy.
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 3 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,514
@1,273,510 (K)
Until you pointed that out no one here doubted the veracity of this story. Good detective skills Anonymous K.
Until you pointed that out no one here doubted the veracity of this story. Good detective skills Anonymous K.
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 5 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,535
@1,273,511 (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
Do you want any of us to contact the US Department of State? As I explained, they could easily locate you.
Do you want any of us to contact the US Department of State? As I explained, they could easily locate you.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 9 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,537
I have rested, and with the help and food of the Chukotko-Kamchatkan tribe, I feel much better. They found someone, one of their kin, who speaks a little English, so that helps to communicate. I asked if they could help me to find a city, and they said yes, but they are a bit suspect in how they seem to be dragging along and being slow on purpose. It's as if they want me to stay in the village. I have no idea why, but I appear to be at their mercy. The chief of the village took me into his igloo/hut to meet his family and his beautiful daughter. They fed me and regaled with me a local, homemade liquor made from elk milk. I asked again if they could please take me to the nearest city, and they said yes, but again, are doing nothing about it. I am becoming slightly concerned. More to come.
Anonymous T replied with this 4 months ago, 9 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,538
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Beautiful daughter?? See if you can become friendly with her. Maybe get a sniff or two of her vulva!!
Beautiful daughter?? See if you can become friendly with her. Maybe get a sniff or two of her vulva!!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,540
@previous (T)
Well, I mean, it might enrage the chief. However, the chief has insisted that I spend tonight in his hut with his family. It is hospitality, I know, but I am suspect, especially since they keep promising to help me escape but doing nothing about it.
Well, I mean, it might enrage the chief. However, the chief has insisted that I spend tonight in his hut with his family. It is hospitality, I know, but I am suspect, especially since they keep promising to help me escape but doing nothing about it.
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 3 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,542
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Do you want any of us to contact the US Department of State? As I explained, they could easily locate you.
Do you want any of us to contact the US Department of State? As I explained, they could easily locate you.
Anonymous T replied with this 4 months ago, 20 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,546
@1,273,540 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Use stealth and the chief won't suspect a thing!! You must sample the fragrance of that vulva! Let us know in detail how it smelt! I'll bet it is very musky with a hint of elk hide!
Use stealth and the chief won't suspect a thing!! You must sample the fragrance of that vulva! Let us know in detail how it smelt! I'll bet it is very musky with a hint of elk hide!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 10 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,549
@previous (T)
Goodness. That's the last thing on my mind now. Survival is first. However, if something should happen, then I suppose I'll take a whiff just for you and describe it here.
Goodness. That's the last thing on my mind now. Survival is first. However, if something should happen, then I suppose I'll take a whiff just for you and describe it here.
Anonymous U replied with this 4 months ago, 16 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,554
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Hi, this sounds pretty urgent. Is there any reason why we shouldn't contact the US Department of State? You don't have to give us your real name, but I want to help. You don't deserve to die like this.
Hi, this sounds pretty urgent. Is there any reason why we shouldn't contact the US Department of State? You don't have to give us your real name, but I want to help. You don't deserve to die like this.
Anonymous T replied with this 4 months ago, 6 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,555
@1,273,549 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
I look forward to your vulva report! Remember........Stealth Sniffs!
I look forward to your vulva report! Remember........Stealth Sniffs!
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 15 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,615
It's been an eventful day, my friends. I'm dropping in with an update because I promised I would, but I don't have very long for reasons you'll soon understand.
As I mentioned in my previous update, I arrived at Norilsk by means of my dog sled. The journey took 7 hours in the end, because a river had risen and flooded the path I was planning to take.
As a result, night was falling when I arrived at Norilsk. As I've previously mentioned, Norilsk is a highly guarded city and there are very few entry points. I couldn't just walk through one of these points because of my legal issues. Thankfully, because I am in Russia, I was able to get the attention of a guard that I earlier became friends with. With his help, I was able to evade the border post.
But what did I have to offer in return, I hear you ask? I have to level with you all, friends, because you deserve an explanation. You know that I am wanted by the Canadian authorities for the theft of an Egyptian mummy. But there is another reason. Inside this particular mummy is a diamond larger than the famous Koh-i-Noor. However, it is sealed inside with a curse and I have been unable to retrieve it myself. There are also certain other jewels, less valuable than the diamond but still worth a lot of money. I had offered him some of those. Finding an expert to break the curse is the exact reason why I came to Norilsk in the first place, and something I had hoped to avoid anybody knowing about. This is now impossible, due to certain events that I will now explain.
The first thing I did when I arrived at Norilsk was seek out my beloved Nastya and my son Pavel. They were not in their quarters, but they had left me a note in an ancient Cuneiform indicating that they were heading west because they had been warned by the elders of her home village that they had discovered a dangerous person who wished to harm her, and they were not going to be able to delay him for very long. I remember her telling me stories of her home village, and her family there. My thoughts are with her father, my soon to be father-in-law. If they have taken in Dmitri, as I fear they have, he, his wife, and his young daughter (Nastya's little sister) may be in significant personal danger. Nevertheless, Nastya had been implored to move west towards Moscow and had already left by the time I arrived. I was disappointed, but glad that she is taking proactive action to keep Pavel safe.
My other task in Norilsk was the retrieval of my Egyptian mummy. Unfortunately, as I was leaving the researchers quarters a number of armed guards attempted to apprehend me. I had to quickly run to the Egyptology building, unwrap the mummy (despite the curse) and escape from the back and run into the Siberian forest.
So we flash forward to right now. There are strange things happening. I've constructed a lean-to and a fire, but I keep hearing scraping sounds and guttural moaning beyond the light circle. I'm afraid that I am being haunted by the mummy's curse, forum! Are there any curse experts here who can advise me what to do?
As I mentioned in my previous update, I arrived at Norilsk by means of my dog sled. The journey took 7 hours in the end, because a river had risen and flooded the path I was planning to take.
As a result, night was falling when I arrived at Norilsk. As I've previously mentioned, Norilsk is a highly guarded city and there are very few entry points. I couldn't just walk through one of these points because of my legal issues. Thankfully, because I am in Russia, I was able to get the attention of a guard that I earlier became friends with. With his help, I was able to evade the border post.
But what did I have to offer in return, I hear you ask? I have to level with you all, friends, because you deserve an explanation. You know that I am wanted by the Canadian authorities for the theft of an Egyptian mummy. But there is another reason. Inside this particular mummy is a diamond larger than the famous Koh-i-Noor. However, it is sealed inside with a curse and I have been unable to retrieve it myself. There are also certain other jewels, less valuable than the diamond but still worth a lot of money. I had offered him some of those. Finding an expert to break the curse is the exact reason why I came to Norilsk in the first place, and something I had hoped to avoid anybody knowing about. This is now impossible, due to certain events that I will now explain.
The first thing I did when I arrived at Norilsk was seek out my beloved Nastya and my son Pavel. They were not in their quarters, but they had left me a note in an ancient Cuneiform indicating that they were heading west because they had been warned by the elders of her home village that they had discovered a dangerous person who wished to harm her, and they were not going to be able to delay him for very long. I remember her telling me stories of her home village, and her family there. My thoughts are with her father, my soon to be father-in-law. If they have taken in Dmitri, as I fear they have, he, his wife, and his young daughter (Nastya's little sister) may be in significant personal danger. Nevertheless, Nastya had been implored to move west towards Moscow and had already left by the time I arrived. I was disappointed, but glad that she is taking proactive action to keep Pavel safe.
My other task in Norilsk was the retrieval of my Egyptian mummy. Unfortunately, as I was leaving the researchers quarters a number of armed guards attempted to apprehend me. I had to quickly run to the Egyptology building, unwrap the mummy (despite the curse) and escape from the back and run into the Siberian forest.
So we flash forward to right now. There are strange things happening. I've constructed a lean-to and a fire, but I keep hearing scraping sounds and guttural moaning beyond the light circle. I'm afraid that I am being haunted by the mummy's curse, forum! Are there any curse experts here who can advise me what to do?
One who knows replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,639
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 4 months ago, 15 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,642
@previous (One who knows)
> Wasting your time dave the shtick stealer attention whore.
Nope, not me, but I'd be lying if I said your monomaniacal obsession with me wasn't funny as fuck :)
> Wasting your time dave the shtick stealer attention whore.
Nope, not me, but I'd be lying if I said your monomaniacal obsession with me wasn't funny as fuck :)
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,661
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) double-posted this 4 months ago, 6 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,724
Oh God, I am in real trouble now. At night, the chief's daughter sneaked into my hut and seduced me. We made love all through the night. To the guy who was asking, her "down there" smelled like elk musk, leather saddles, and fermented seal meat. Anyway, the chief found out. Naturally, he is furious. He has decided to offer me as a human sacrifice to their god tomorrow. I have to find a way to escape! They are going to flay me alive! I am beginning to develop an escape plan. More to come.
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 45 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,728
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Please don't feel obligated to stay alive just for our sake. If it's your time to go, it is better to face it with dignity than try to escape it.
Please don't feel obligated to stay alive just for our sake. If it's your time to go, it is better to face it with dignity than try to escape it.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 15 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,729
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 4 months ago, 14 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,730
Anonymous K replied with this 4 months ago, 19 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,801
So what happened to Matt Throckmorton? Was he flayed, then thrown over an icy cliff?
Anonymous T replied with this 4 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,813
@1,273,724 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Oh God, I am in real trouble now. At night, the chief's daughter sneaked into my hut and seduced me. We made love all through the night. To the guy who was asking, her "down there" smelled like elk musk, leather saddles, and fermented seal meat. Anyway, the chief found out. Naturally, he is furious. He has decided to offer me as a human sacrifice to their god tomorrow. I have to find a way to escape! They are going to flay me alive! I am beginning to develop an escape plan. More to come.
lolol
> Oh God, I am in real trouble now. At night, the chief's daughter sneaked into my hut and seduced me. We made love all through the night. To the guy who was asking, her "down there" smelled like elk musk, leather saddles, and fermented seal meat. Anyway, the chief found out. Naturally, he is furious. He has decided to offer me as a human sacrifice to their god tomorrow. I have to find a way to escape! They are going to flay me alive! I am beginning to develop an escape plan. More to come.
lolol
Anonymous Z-7 joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 7 minutes later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,815
I'm old now, but I remember when I was young and full of life, I used to live in Norilsk, Russia. It's a cold place, but beautiful in its own way. I used to work at the Norilsk Nickel plant, back when it was still running. It was hard work, but it paid the bills. One day, I met this man, he was new to the city, and I could tell he was struggling to adjust to the harsh climate. I took him under my wing, showed him the ropes. We became fast friends, and I grew to admire him. He was strong, with broad shoulders and a kind heart. I took him to see the Norilsk State Reserve, with its stunning tundra and unique flora and fauna. We also visited the Gulag History Museum, a reminder of the city's dark past. He was a good listener, and I found myself telling him stories of my past, my dreams, and my fears. As time went on, I realized that my feelings for him were more than just friendship. I was in love. But I was afraid to tell him, afraid of ruining what we had. So, I kept it to myself, and we continued to explore the city together. We visited the Doll's House, a quirky museum filled with dolls from all around the world. And we walked along the shores of Lake Dolgoye, admiring the beauty of the surrounding landscape. One day, as we were walking through the snow-covered streets, I finally gathered the courage to tell him how I felt. He looked at me, surprised, but then he smiled. He told me that he felt the same way. We spent the rest of our days together, exploring the city and each other. And even though we've both moved on since then, I will always cherish the memories we made in Norilsk.
It's a cold place, but it's where I found love, and for that, I will always be grateful.
It's a cold place, but it's where I found love, and for that, I will always be grateful.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 19 hours later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,877
Friends, today was simply astounding. The chief and the tribe had me tied to a pole, ready to flay me alive as a sacrifice to their local god in retribution for my sleeping with the chief's daughter. Well, the executioner had his bone knife in hand and was about to make the first cut on my chest when everyone heard a great screeching form the sky I looked up to see a giant Siberian eagle the size of a large automobile. Hanging from its talons were leather straps, indicating that it was a trained bird of prey from a falconer. It dove toward the scene, scaring off the tribesmen. It then grasped the pole I was tied to, and, in one fell swoop, pulled it from the ground with me still on it! It flew me high into the sky and to its nest high atop a rocky, snowy crag! Then, using its magnificent beak, it untied me, picked me up gently again, and flew me to a hidden castle deep in the Siberian wasteland! The castle is the home of the falconer, a young woman who looks pale with snow-white hair and has a mysterious aura about her. She has told me, in perfect English, that I am to stay at her castle fora day or two, and all will be explained!
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 4 months ago, 2 hours later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,883
I am sorry that I have not updated for several days now. Friends, I have made a terrible mistake by desecrating the mummy. I hear it following, scratching at the walls of my tent in the night, breathing heavily in the darkness beyond the fireline. Whenever I sleep, I am haunted by angry red eyes and a voice from beyond the grave: "You have violated my body, and you shall pay the price!". I am so tired. Two days ago, I woke up and my dogs had turned into skeletons overnight. I have had to abandon the sled, and with it all my possessions except for the diamond, my phone and my portable solar panel charging station. I am making for Moscow, but the traversal is tough. For some reason, I am encountering bogs, swamps, and quagmires. I seem to be coming across large numbers of forest fires. Three hours ago I walked onto a dirt path and I sank up to my crotch in mud. This is not usual, as Father Dave will be able to testify. At this time of year, everything should be frozen and simple, if dangerous, to walk through. I have never before truly understood the dangerous impact that human-induced climate change is having on the world.
Right now I am relaxing in an abandoned log cabin I discovered in the woods. Many of my paths have been cut off and made impassable, so I am forced to proceed through the infamous Dyatlov Pass. I am scared, fora, because earlier a poster with my tripcode and ID replied to me and told me not to enter the caves in Dyatlov Pass. How did they know I would have to go through? Why can't I go into caves? What caves? What if I have no choice? Questions like these are ringing through my head. In the meantime, the mummy is still haunting me and...
I have just heard a new sound, unlike anything else I have ever heard. It sounded like the shriek a man would make when he is tortured to death. It was a gurgling, throaty scream at such a loud noise. It is a well-known fact that Yeti can be found in this area. I feel like I am being hunted, and the walls are closing in on me.
Right now I am relaxing in an abandoned log cabin I discovered in the woods. Many of my paths have been cut off and made impassable, so I am forced to proceed through the infamous Dyatlov Pass. I am scared, fora, because earlier a poster with my tripcode and ID replied to me and told me not to enter the caves in Dyatlov Pass. How did they know I would have to go through? Why can't I go into caves? What caves? What if I have no choice? Questions like these are ringing through my head. In the meantime, the mummy is still haunting me and...
I have just heard a new sound, unlike anything else I have ever heard. It sounded like the shriek a man would make when he is tortured to death. It was a gurgling, throaty scream at such a loud noise. It is a well-known fact that Yeti can be found in this area. I feel like I am being hunted, and the walls are closing in on me.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg replied with this 4 months ago, 16 minutes later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,885
The most curious thing happened to me last night. I was awoken from my sleep by some sort of primitive warning, some primal hunch from our millions of years of evolution. I looked up to see my host, the strange white lady, creeping through my bedroom! I pretended to be asleep. She crept to my bed and bent over me. Suddenly, I was paralyzed and could not move. What happened is now only a haze, but I have flashes of memories of her bending over my throat. This morning, I feel weak and my skin is pale. I hope I am not coming down with something.
Anonymous T replied with this 4 months ago, 37 minutes later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,273,886
Anonymous L replied with this 3 months ago, 3 days later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,280
Well did she have white hair on the vulva or did someone shove a gherkin into your liver?
(Edited 34 seconds later.)
Anonymous K replied with this 3 months ago, 1 hour later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,307
@previous (L)
Throckmorton is no longer with us. If you look up his full name and city, you will find his obituary.
Throckmorton is no longer with us. If you look up his full name and city, you will find his obituary.
Anonymous L replied with this 3 months ago, 29 minutes later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,309
@previous (K)
Sorry but you are full of poo poo. He is still alive and....well maybe not well but not deceased. This man is a true swashbuckler. He is use to surviving all odds. He will return. Count on it.
Sorry but you are full of poo poo. He is still alive and....well maybe not well but not deceased. This man is a true swashbuckler. He is use to surviving all odds. He will return. Count on it.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 2 days later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,522
Friends, so much has happened in the last several days. I was at the white lady's castle. Every night, she would sneak in and, as I fell into a state of sleep paralysis, reveal her fangs and feed on my blood! Yes, she was a vampiress! Well, one day as she slept during the sunlight hours, I could not take any more. I staked her heart, killing her, but releasing her bound servants, who were Siberian yetis. Thankful to me for saving them, one of them put me on his shoulder and bounded across the snow, taking me as far as he could without exhaustion.
I thanked him with gestures, he not understanding human language of course, and trekked on. I came upon an abandoned cabin, and, much to my relief, found it stocked with hunting equipment and firewood. I built a roaring fire and slept. The next morning, I went out hunting and managed to kill a large Siberian caribou! I dragged it back to the cabin, butchered it, and now I have meat for weeks. I plan to stay in this cabin for the time being until. I feel ready to keep going. At least here, I have food and warmth.
However, as I sleep in the night, I keep hearing strange sounds outside the cabin, like a rustling and whimpering, and then scratching at the windows. I am in terror most nights, but I have devised a system locking the door and piling furniture against it. I also have the hunting rifle should anyone break into the cabin. More to come!
I thanked him with gestures, he not understanding human language of course, and trekked on. I came upon an abandoned cabin, and, much to my relief, found it stocked with hunting equipment and firewood. I built a roaring fire and slept. The next morning, I went out hunting and managed to kill a large Siberian caribou! I dragged it back to the cabin, butchered it, and now I have meat for weeks. I plan to stay in this cabin for the time being until. I feel ready to keep going. At least here, I have food and warmth.
However, as I sleep in the night, I keep hearing strange sounds outside the cabin, like a rustling and whimpering, and then scratching at the windows. I am in terror most nights, but I have devised a system locking the door and piling furniture against it. I also have the hunting rifle should anyone break into the cabin. More to come!
Anonymous Z-9 joined in and replied with this 3 months ago, 13 minutes later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,527
Anonymous K replied with this 3 months ago, 1 hour later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,535
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 42 minutes later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,537
Anonymous H replied with this 3 months ago, 5 minutes later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,542
@1,274,522 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Friends, so much has happened in the last several days. I was at the white lady's castle. Every night, she would sneak in and, as I fell into a state of sleep paralysis, reveal her fangs and feed on my blood! Yes, she was a vampiress! Well, one day as she slept during the sunlight hours, I could not take any more. I staked her heart, killing her, but releasing her bound servants, who were Siberian yetis. Thankful to me for saving them, one of them put me on his shoulder and bounded across the snow, taking me as far as he could without exhaustion.
> I thanked him with gestures, he not understanding human language of course, and trekked on. I came upon an abandoned cabin, and, much to my relief, found it stocked with hunting equipment and firewood. I built a roaring fire and slept. The next morning, I went out hunting and managed to kill a large Siberian caribou! I dragged it back to the cabin, butchered it, and now I have meat for weeks. I plan to stay in this cabin for the time being until. I feel ready to keep going. At least here, I have food and warmth.
> However, as I sleep in the night, I keep hearing strange sounds outside the cabin, like a rustling and whimpering, and then scratching at the windows. I am in terror most nights, but I have devised a system locking the door and piling furniture against it. I also have the hunting rifle should anyone break into the cabin. More to come!
Next month this guy will be fifty years old.
Fifty. Years. Old.
> Friends, so much has happened in the last several days. I was at the white lady's castle. Every night, she would sneak in and, as I fell into a state of sleep paralysis, reveal her fangs and feed on my blood! Yes, she was a vampiress! Well, one day as she slept during the sunlight hours, I could not take any more. I staked her heart, killing her, but releasing her bound servants, who were Siberian yetis. Thankful to me for saving them, one of them put me on his shoulder and bounded across the snow, taking me as far as he could without exhaustion.
> I thanked him with gestures, he not understanding human language of course, and trekked on. I came upon an abandoned cabin, and, much to my relief, found it stocked with hunting equipment and firewood. I built a roaring fire and slept. The next morning, I went out hunting and managed to kill a large Siberian caribou! I dragged it back to the cabin, butchered it, and now I have meat for weeks. I plan to stay in this cabin for the time being until. I feel ready to keep going. At least here, I have food and warmth.
> However, as I sleep in the night, I keep hearing strange sounds outside the cabin, like a rustling and whimpering, and then scratching at the windows. I am in terror most nights, but I have devised a system locking the door and piling furniture against it. I also have the hunting rifle should anyone break into the cabin. More to come!
Next month this guy will be fifty years old.
Fifty. Years. Old.
Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w replied with this 3 months ago, 23 seconds later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,543
Father Merrin !u5oFWxmY7U replied with this 3 months ago, 8 minutes later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,544
Anonymous H replied with this 3 months ago, 2 minutes later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,545
@previous (Father Merrin !u5oFWxmY7U)
Not obsessed. Just amazed that you're going to be fifty years old next month.
Fifty. Years. Old.
Not obsessed. Just amazed that you're going to be fifty years old next month.
Fifty. Years. Old.
Father Merrin !u5oFWxmY7U replied with this 3 months ago, 14 minutes later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,547
@previous (H)
I'm not going to be 50 next month, but I will be 38 come April if you want to write it down. We all know you are talking about Matt. Come up with some new material. You're becoming very boring. Why don't you spend some time holding and looking at your penis and contemplate it, like Aristotle did the bust of Homer. Maybe you can come up with the reason you have one.
I'm not going to be 50 next month, but I will be 38 come April if you want to write it down. We all know you are talking about Matt. Come up with some new material. You're becoming very boring. Why don't you spend some time holding and looking at your penis and contemplate it, like Aristotle did the bust of Homer. Maybe you can come up with the reason you have one.
Anonymous H replied with this 3 months ago, 1 minute later, 2 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,548
@previous (Father Merrin !u5oFWxmY7U)
> I'm not going to be 50 next month
You are. Fifty years old.
Fifty. Years. Old.
> I'm not going to be 50 next month
You are. Fifty years old.
Fifty. Years. Old.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 2 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,608
Last night was the worst. The sniffing and scratching became a howling just outside my window! In the morning, I went outside to find gigantic paw prints in the snow. I don't like this. I have lots of caribou meat left, but I think I'll abandon this cabin because someone is messing with me. One more night of warmth and food, and I shall trek onward to try to find civilization. More to come.
Anonymous U replied with this 3 months ago, 3 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,611
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Should I contact the Department of State to get you some help? The last reason you gave to not do this, about them not being able to find you, I addressed. So I'm not sure if you saw my response or not since you have a lot going on over there.
Should I contact the Department of State to get you some help? The last reason you gave to not do this, about them not being able to find you, I addressed. So I'm not sure if you saw my response or not since you have a lot going on over there.
Anonymous J replied with this 3 months ago, 13 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,613
@1,274,545 (H)
> Not obsessed.
Lol. You have been counting his age for over a decade now. I can remember when you used to repeat over and over again "39 almost 40".
> Not obsessed.
Lol. You have been counting his age for over a decade now. I can remember when you used to repeat over and over again "39 almost 40".
Anonymous Z-10 joined in and replied with this 3 months ago, 6 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,657
Anonymous Z-11 joined in and replied with this 3 months ago, 2 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,660
Anonymous J replied with this 3 months ago, 1 minute later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,662
Anonymous H replied with this 3 months ago, 13 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,663
@previous (J)
> No they didn't. Because it's pathetic and obsessive.
Again, nobody's obsessed with you. It's just that next month you'll be fifty years old.
Fifty. Years. Old.
> No they didn't. Because it's pathetic and obsessive.
Again, nobody's obsessed with you. It's just that next month you'll be fifty years old.
Fifty. Years. Old.
Indie the Grate joined in and replied with this 3 months ago, 1 hour later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,667
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 4 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,702
I have set off from the cabin. I have food and fire, so I am alright for now. A Siberian wolf has taken to following me, not out of aggression, but the poor thing is hungry. I have begun to feed him and let him stay near the fire. He is warming up to me, so to speak, and I think he might make a good companion. Last night, as we slept in the small makeshift igloo I built, I heard the whimpering and sniffing around again outside. My wolf companion perked up and growled, and the interloper went away. In the very far distance, I see smoke rising up into the sky. I shall go and investigate. I shall name my wolf companion Eric. More to come.
Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w replied with this 3 months ago, 27 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,710
Anonymous U replied with this 3 months ago, 5 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,772
@1,274,702 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Should I contact the Department of State to get you some help? The last reason you gave to not do this, about them not being able to find you, I addressed. So I'm not sure if you saw my response or not since you have a lot going on over there.
Should I contact the Department of State to get you some help? The last reason you gave to not do this, about them not being able to find you, I addressed. So I'm not sure if you saw my response or not since you have a lot going on over there.
Father Dave !RsSxeehGwc replied with this 3 months ago, 1 day later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,979
@1,274,702 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> I have set off from the cabin. I have food and fire, so I am alright for now.
Yes, always remember to pack plenty of food and fire before trecking across Siberia.
> I have set off from the cabin. I have food and fire, so I am alright for now.
Yes, always remember to pack plenty of food and fire before trecking across Siberia.
Anonymous K replied with this 3 months ago, 4 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,274,980
Anonymous Z-13 joined in and replied with this 3 months ago, 1 hour later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,002
This may be one of the greatest things I’ve ever read on the Internet. A dull recounting of men’s adventure with hot and willing women, vampires, human sacrifice, mummies, an ambiguously gay near-cannibal dog sled excursion, rescue by a Siberian eagle, imposter agents, messages from a future self. The times and dates don’t add up, nor does it make sense to have a mummy theft subplot in a former Soviet closed city.
This is sublime.
This is sublime.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 1 day later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,157
So much has happened. On my trek across Siberia after the vampiress with my new wolf companion Eric, I came across an abandoned Soviet Era Kalinin K-7 aircraft! It is not crashed -- it is in perfect working order. I have never flown a plane, but I have played countless years of flight simulators. Friends, I am going to board with Eric and try my hand at flying it to Moscow for rescue. Someone must have put stabilizer and antifreeze in the fuel, for the tank is full. I was able to start one of the engines without too much difficulty, so I believe I shall be able to start all of them. The flight manual is in Russian unfortunately, but the control panel in the cockpit is very similar to the ones in flight simulators. It may be my only chance. Eric seems nervous, but I pet him and he calms down. We shall build a fire and spend one night, then, first thing in the morning, I shall try to fly the Soviet Kalinin K-7! I shall update you soon!
Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w replied with this 3 months ago, 12 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,158
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Weird how you and Matt post a mere 10 minutes apart, after neither of you posted for several days.
Weird how you and Matt post a mere 10 minutes apart, after neither of you posted for several days.
Anonymous T replied with this 3 months ago, 20 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,161
@previous (Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w)
Keep thinking Sherlock. I think you've just about put two and two together and figured out who this Throckmorton is!!
Keep thinking Sherlock. I think you've just about put two and two together and figured out who this Throckmorton is!!
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 3 months ago, 29 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,168
Hello, dear friends. I have had many private messages from concerned members of the community asking me if I am still alive. I am happy to report that I have escaped a terrifying encounter which I shall detail now. When I last updated you all, I was inside a log cabin being assaulted by a mummy's curse. It was shortly after that post that the reanimated mummy itself appeared and began to bang and thrash on the door. The wood was old, so it began to break very quickly. At the same time, I was still hearing the strange gurgling scream come from the night. Just before the door broke and allowed in the mummy, none other than the abominable snowman, the fabled Chuncunya, appeared. He made for a ferocious and terrifying sight, and he quickly began laying into the mummy, who fought back with no less enthusiasm and with more vigor than I would have expected a 4500 year old corpse to hold.
During the battle between the snowman and the mummy, I managed to sneak away deeper into Dyatlov Pass. Since then I have been wandering, surviving on berries and meltwater. I am being followed, however. The yeti, evidently the victor of the bout, is stalking my movements. I see him in the distance sometimes, and he gets closer to my camp at night, to the point where I can see his eyes glowing like orange lamps in the pitch blackness. Thankfully, he seems afraid of fire, so he has yet to assault me. He must have some reason to be following me for this distance, however. Last night I awoke to discover that my tent was being inspected from the outside by a large animal. I had no proof that it was Yeti, but it seems very likely to me. I spoke to Nastya last night also. She was waiting for me inside a cave complex to my north in the pass, but has encountered some trouble and needs my help to escape. I am currently headed there now. I have strong doubts about this, because I was warned by my future self not to enter caves in Dyatlov Pass, but I have no choice. If I do not, my beloved Nastya will surely starve or freeze to death.
During the battle between the snowman and the mummy, I managed to sneak away deeper into Dyatlov Pass. Since then I have been wandering, surviving on berries and meltwater. I am being followed, however. The yeti, evidently the victor of the bout, is stalking my movements. I see him in the distance sometimes, and he gets closer to my camp at night, to the point where I can see his eyes glowing like orange lamps in the pitch blackness. Thankfully, he seems afraid of fire, so he has yet to assault me. He must have some reason to be following me for this distance, however. Last night I awoke to discover that my tent was being inspected from the outside by a large animal. I had no proof that it was Yeti, but it seems very likely to me. I spoke to Nastya last night also. She was waiting for me inside a cave complex to my north in the pass, but has encountered some trouble and needs my help to escape. I am currently headed there now. I have strong doubts about this, because I was warned by my future self not to enter caves in Dyatlov Pass, but I have no choice. If I do not, my beloved Nastya will surely starve or freeze to death.
The Board replied with this 3 months ago, 5 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,169
@previous (Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU)
The Board can attest to the accuracy of these claims by the one true Throckmorton.
The Board can attest to the accuracy of these claims by the one true Throckmorton.
(Edited 16 seconds later.)
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 54 seconds later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,170
@previous (The Board)He is the imposter, to which my tripcode can attest. Anyway, leave me alone while I figure out the flight controls on this Kalinin K-7.
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 3 months ago, 3 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,173
Please do not pay attention to the imposter Dmitri Orlov, who stole my phone at the prison camp and has been impersonating me ever since. He has even gone so far as to have plastic surgery to look like me; he is a true psychopath. Do not be fooled by him.
Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w replied with this 3 months ago, 6 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,179
@1,275,161 (T)
Oh, I know it's Matt. But on both of his personas, he claims they aren't the other. So I'm just fucking with him at this point.
Oh, I know it's Matt. But on both of his personas, he claims they aren't the other. So I'm just fucking with him at this point.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 5 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,181
Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w replied with this 3 months ago, 37 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,184
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 1 hour later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,192
Oh, dear. Things have gotten a bit out of hand! Well, I got all the engines started on the Kalinin K-7. Using my extensive knowledge of flight simulators, I managed to take off! I kept it at a safe height of only 5,000 feet. Well, Eric and I were flying along. I had him in the co-pilot's seat with a leather flying helmet on his lupine head. It was actually exhilarating, knowing how to fly a plane like that! Well, I saw ahead in the distance -- could it really be? -- a tiny landing strip. It must have been from the Soviet Union, something that secret agents might use or whatever. Well, on the descent, my ailerons an d elevators froze! I had almost no control of the Soviet Era Kalinin K-7. My only hope was to decrease the throttle slowly so that the plane would lose altitude. This worked at first, but then the landing gear was frozen. I would have to circle back around the airstrip. Well, the elevators de-iced, but then froze again in the position that increased my elevation! I was flying up, up into the open sky, and I was terrified! As the Soviet Era Kalinin K-7 reached 10,000 feet, then 15,000, then 20,000, I knew that we would die if I did not think and act quickly.
Parachutes! I knew that the Soviet military pilots always carried them. I quickly searched the cabin and found one. It was a very old Cold War model. I prayed to whatever gods might listen that it would still work. I strapped myself and Eric my lupine companion into the parachute. When the plane was at 25,000 feet and still climbing, we jumped. I pulled the ripcord, and -- it worked! We floated slowly to the snowy ground. I watched the Soviet Era Kalinin K-7 climb, then finally stall, then soar down in a nosedive into a fiery explosion in the cold, Siberian permafrost.
We landed safely. I unstrapped us and I saw a small, old sign that read "Dyatlov Pass". That sounds awfully familiar. I'm sure I'll remember why it's famous. For now, I've built a makeshift igloo for Eric and me, lit a warm fire, and killed a couple of Arctic hares for dinner. More to come soon, friends!
Parachutes! I knew that the Soviet military pilots always carried them. I quickly searched the cabin and found one. It was a very old Cold War model. I prayed to whatever gods might listen that it would still work. I strapped myself and Eric my lupine companion into the parachute. When the plane was at 25,000 feet and still climbing, we jumped. I pulled the ripcord, and -- it worked! We floated slowly to the snowy ground. I watched the Soviet Era Kalinin K-7 climb, then finally stall, then soar down in a nosedive into a fiery explosion in the cold, Siberian permafrost.
We landed safely. I unstrapped us and I saw a small, old sign that read "Dyatlov Pass". That sounds awfully familiar. I'm sure I'll remember why it's famous. For now, I've built a makeshift igloo for Eric and me, lit a warm fire, and killed a couple of Arctic hares for dinner. More to come soon, friends!
Anonymous H replied with this 3 months ago, 43 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,196
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> Oh, dear. Things have gotten a bit out of hand! Well, I got all the engines started on the Kalinin K-7. Using my extensive knowledge of flight simulators, I managed to take off! I kept it at a safe height of only 5,000 feet. Well, Eric and I were flying along. I had him in the co-pilot's seat with a leather flying helmet on his lupine head. It was actually exhilarating, knowing how to fly a plane like that! Well, I saw ahead in the distance -- could it really be? -- a tiny landing strip. It must have been from the Soviet Union, something that secret agents might use or whatever. Well, on the descent, my ailerons an d elevators froze! I had almost no control of the Soviet Era Kalinin K-7. My only hope was to decrease the throttle slowly so that the plane would lose altitude. This worked at first, but then the landing gear was frozen. I would have to circle back around the airstrip. Well, the elevators de-iced, but then froze again in the position that increased my elevation! I was flying up, up into the open sky, and I was terrified! As the Soviet Era Kalinin K-7 reached 10,000 feet, then 15,000, then 20,000, I knew that we would die if I did not think and act quickly.
>
> Parachutes! I knew that the Soviet military pilots always carried them. I quickly searched the cabin and found one. It was a very old Cold War model. I prayed to whatever gods might listen that it would still work. I strapped myself and Eric my lupine companion into the parachute. When the plane was at 25,000 feet and still climbing, we jumped. I pulled the ripcord, and -- it worked! We floated slowly to the snowy ground. I watched the Soviet Era Kalinin K-7 climb, then finally stall, then soar down in a nosedive into a fiery explosion in the cold, Siberian permafrost.
>
> We landed safely. I unstrapped us and I saw a small, old sign that read "Dyatlov Pass". That sounds awfully familiar. I'm sure I'll remember why it's famous. For now, I've built a makeshift igloo for Eric and me, lit a warm fire, and killed a couple of Arctic hares for dinner. More to come soon, friends!
Fifty. Years. Old.
> Oh, dear. Things have gotten a bit out of hand! Well, I got all the engines started on the Kalinin K-7. Using my extensive knowledge of flight simulators, I managed to take off! I kept it at a safe height of only 5,000 feet. Well, Eric and I were flying along. I had him in the co-pilot's seat with a leather flying helmet on his lupine head. It was actually exhilarating, knowing how to fly a plane like that! Well, I saw ahead in the distance -- could it really be? -- a tiny landing strip. It must have been from the Soviet Union, something that secret agents might use or whatever. Well, on the descent, my ailerons an d elevators froze! I had almost no control of the Soviet Era Kalinin K-7. My only hope was to decrease the throttle slowly so that the plane would lose altitude. This worked at first, but then the landing gear was frozen. I would have to circle back around the airstrip. Well, the elevators de-iced, but then froze again in the position that increased my elevation! I was flying up, up into the open sky, and I was terrified! As the Soviet Era Kalinin K-7 reached 10,000 feet, then 15,000, then 20,000, I knew that we would die if I did not think and act quickly.
>
> Parachutes! I knew that the Soviet military pilots always carried them. I quickly searched the cabin and found one. It was a very old Cold War model. I prayed to whatever gods might listen that it would still work. I strapped myself and Eric my lupine companion into the parachute. When the plane was at 25,000 feet and still climbing, we jumped. I pulled the ripcord, and -- it worked! We floated slowly to the snowy ground. I watched the Soviet Era Kalinin K-7 climb, then finally stall, then soar down in a nosedive into a fiery explosion in the cold, Siberian permafrost.
>
> We landed safely. I unstrapped us and I saw a small, old sign that read "Dyatlov Pass". That sounds awfully familiar. I'm sure I'll remember why it's famous. For now, I've built a makeshift igloo for Eric and me, lit a warm fire, and killed a couple of Arctic hares for dinner. More to come soon, friends!
Fifty. Years. Old.
Chuckle Brother 2 !ErY2TknG0w replied with this 3 months ago, 1 hour later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,214
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 5 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,275
I remembered why Dyatlov Pass is famous. It's where those hikers quickly ran out of their tents in underwear and died from some mysterious cause. I am bit worried, but my wolf companion Eric seems at east. However, last night, I exited our igloo to pee, and I saw some strange, moving lights all around the igloo. These were not the Northern Lights, but rather at almost ground level, tiny points of lights moving all around. I am really scared. Tomorrow, I shall explore the area with Eric. More to come!
Anonymous Z-14 joined in and replied with this 3 months ago, 40 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,286
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 5 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,289
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) double-posted this 3 months ago, 12 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,343
This is truly disturbing. Today, in the Dyatlov Pass during a blizzard, Eric my wolf companion and I went for a hike to see what we could find. We found a steel, locked door with military signage all over it buried into snowy hill! The door is fast locked, but I am trying to think of a way to open it. Without a doubt, it's a Soviet Era installment and may have supplies inside! Second, I saw, across a valley, a man standing on a hill. He looked EXACTLY LIKE ME. Eric whine and growled at the figure, but he wa so far away that Eric and I cold not approach him, especially in the blizzard. More to come!
Anonymous H replied with this 3 months ago, 38 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,349
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> This is truly disturbing.
I know right? Next month you'll be fifty years old.
Fifty. Years. Old.
> This is truly disturbing.
I know right? Next month you'll be fifty years old.
Fifty. Years. Old.
Throckmorton !AJHDwJ64aU replied with this 3 months ago, 59 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,363
Greetings to all, I am updating you from inside the cave where Nastya is waiting for me. I was expecting a natural formation but it seems more like a man-made shaft, although I'm not aware of any natural resources in this area that a company could mine, nor were there any signs outside.
It was fairly warm and dry inside, which was a relief after so long in the cold snow being chased by a yeti. I found an old shaft elevator, and with no sign of Nastya I decided to descend.
When the doors opened, I saw a series of blinking lights. They were difficult to look at because of their intensity. Beyond the lights, there was a set of metal swinging doors. I went through, and I saw something unbelievable.
On a chair, strapped into a strange machine, was none other than Joseph Stalin himself! He was visibly decomposed, but his eyes were following me as I approached the machine. I do not know how it was operating, because there were no wires or visible means of powering it. I became afraid, because as I got close to Stalin he started to visibly shake, as if he was trying to overthrow some kind of invisible bind and spring at me. His eyes were locked on the pocket where I kept the Koh-i-Noor diamond. Behind me, the elevator had started to ascend again, and I thought that the yeti had come, or that perhaps the mummy had found me again. So I fled deeper into the facility. I ran for maybe 40 minutes before I stopped. I am currently typing this from inside a strange room that resembles a cafeteria. It is clearly soviet-era, for there are gaudy chandeliers and communist symbols. Why would the Soviets resurrect Joseph Stalin? And why would they keep him in a secret facility at Dyatlov Pass?
I can only wonder.
It was fairly warm and dry inside, which was a relief after so long in the cold snow being chased by a yeti. I found an old shaft elevator, and with no sign of Nastya I decided to descend.
When the doors opened, I saw a series of blinking lights. They were difficult to look at because of their intensity. Beyond the lights, there was a set of metal swinging doors. I went through, and I saw something unbelievable.
On a chair, strapped into a strange machine, was none other than Joseph Stalin himself! He was visibly decomposed, but his eyes were following me as I approached the machine. I do not know how it was operating, because there were no wires or visible means of powering it. I became afraid, because as I got close to Stalin he started to visibly shake, as if he was trying to overthrow some kind of invisible bind and spring at me. His eyes were locked on the pocket where I kept the Koh-i-Noor diamond. Behind me, the elevator had started to ascend again, and I thought that the yeti had come, or that perhaps the mummy had found me again. So I fled deeper into the facility. I ran for maybe 40 minutes before I stopped. I am currently typing this from inside a strange room that resembles a cafeteria. It is clearly soviet-era, for there are gaudy chandeliers and communist symbols. Why would the Soviets resurrect Joseph Stalin? And why would they keep him in a secret facility at Dyatlov Pass?
I can only wonder.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 2 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,394
I went back to the strange door. I rummaged around the area and actually found an old metal keycard! I inserted it, and the door opened! What I found was nothing short of amazing. Eric my wolf companion and I discovered that it is an entire underground complex. It is a remnant from the Soviet Era, and clearly military. It had operating rooms (surgeries), science labs, all sorts of electronic control rooms, and even a fully functional MIG-15, not to mention a fully intact and operational T-34 tank! Thank God. We found tons of tinned food, lots of tools, and even fully functional AK-47s with tons of ammo. There's an area in the back behind a wire fence that says "Restricted Access" in Russian. I am considering cutting the wire and exploring it, but Eric keeps barking and whining at the era and turning back as if to warn me.
We head a loud groan from deep inside the restricted area. It was probably a pipe or something. The complex is stilly functional. I found a breaker and managed to get the lights and power working.
I am Stil concerned about the "anti-Throckmorton" I saw on the hill, the man who looks exactly like me and is obviously stalking me. Eric and I shall find a comfortable bunk in the residential area of the military underground complex for the night. Tomorrow, we shall explore further. More to come!
We head a loud groan from deep inside the restricted area. It was probably a pipe or something. The complex is stilly functional. I found a breaker and managed to get the lights and power working.
I am Stil concerned about the "anti-Throckmorton" I saw on the hill, the man who looks exactly like me and is obviously stalking me. Eric and I shall find a comfortable bunk in the residential area of the military underground complex for the night. Tomorrow, we shall explore further. More to come!
Anonymous K replied with this 3 months ago, 7 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,397
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 1 minute later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,398
Anonymous K replied with this 3 months ago, 39 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,399
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
Story. Yes.
Boring. Yes.
Your life. You wish.
Fifty. Years. Old.
Story. Yes.
Boring. Yes.
Your life. You wish.
Fifty. Years. Old.
Anonymous H replied with this 3 months ago, 2 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,400
@1,275,398 (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> It is my life.
Yep. This is your life. And next month you'll be fifty years old.
Fifty. Years. Old.
> It is my life.
Yep. This is your life. And next month you'll be fifty years old.
Fifty. Years. Old.
Anonymous Z-15 joined in and replied with this 3 months ago, 2 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,411
Who knew that Siberia had ubiquitous 5G coverage? Unpopulated areas, steel and concrete bunkers, gulags. Russia must be amazing.
Anonymous J replied with this 3 months ago, 3 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,449
Fact Checker replied with this 3 months ago, 3 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,450
@1,275,411 (Z-15)
"Siberia" is a state of mind not a place. A depraved, deranged, and deprived state of mind.
"Siberia" is a state of mind not a place. A depraved, deranged, and deprived state of mind.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 20 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,546
This morning, Eric my lupine companion and I broke into the restricted area of the underground military bunker complex from the Soviet era. I can tell you that something horrible is going on, friends! We entered a strange science lab -- quite worn and rusted and out of use -- behind which was yet another restricted area. There, behind the fence, the zombies of Lenin, Stalin, the entire Romanov family, Khrushchev, Yeltsin, Gorbachev, and several other famous Russian leaders, including Ivan the Terrible, Catherine the Great, and many others were there! They are stumbling around like brain-dead, undead zombies with rotting corpses! Dear God, what did the Soviets do?? Once they noticed me, they began growling and groaning the Russian word for brains and clamoring and reaching for me through the wire fence. I am quite certain of what would happen if they got loose. Have they been here in the dark, undead and moving, for this long? Dear God, the poor things! I am not sure what to do, but I went back and checked out the T-334 tank, just in case. It is fully operational. I have decided that Eric and I shall sleep in the tank tonight, just incase those zombies get loose. I still plan to solve the mystery of the man who looks exactly like me, whom I saw across the vale. More to come, friends!
(Edited 34 seconds later.)
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) double-posted this 3 months ago, 20 hours later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,762
During the night, as Eric my wolf companion and I slept in the Soviet era T-34 tank for protection from the zombies of all the dead Russian leaders, they escaped their cage, so great was their desire for my brain! Fortunately, the tank kept us safe. This morning, the zombies were still clawing at the tank, so I turned it on and ran over them, smearing the poor things into their second, and final, death. I used the tank to burst out of the secret military bunker and back to the Dyatlov Pass. Well, I must have triggered security, for an entire brigade of the Russian Army has now met and confronted me! Fortunately, since most of their resources are in Ukraine, all they have is an old, rusty armored vehicle (not even a tank) and some foot soldiers. They are using a megaphone to tell me to come out and surrender, and they will not kill me. However, they do not know that I am technically a Russian spy. I am deciding what to do. I could use the tank to take out the entire brigade I suppose.
Also, the anti-Throckmorton, the man who looks just like me, is standing across the vale watching the scene. This is positively unnerving. More to come.
Also, the anti-Throckmorton, the man who looks just like me, is standing across the vale watching the scene. This is positively unnerving. More to come.
Anonymous Z-16 joined in and replied with this 3 months ago, 3 minutes later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,763
Anonymous Q replied with this 3 months ago, 1 hour later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,770
commandeer a lada they can go anywhere
Fake anon !ZkUt8arUCU replied with this 3 months ago, 1 hour later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,786
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 17 hours later, 4 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,882
Well, I made my decision. Eric my lupine companion and I used the T-34 tank to blast through the Russian Army brigade. Since most of Russia's equipment is in Ukraine, it was not hard. I am now on a tank rampage across Siberia. The Russian Army can do little, since they are short of troops and supplies. I am heading toward Moscow. I have already received a transmission on the tank radio from the head of the FSB asking me to please stop, but telling me that, since I am now a Russian spy, they will not stop me. My only goal is to reach civilization and carry on with my new spy life. However, I see on the horizon that anti-Throckmorton, and I have begun taking pot shots at him!
Anonymous U replied with this 3 months ago, 3 hours later, 4 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,915
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
> I have already received a transmission on the tank radio from the head of the FSB asking me to please stop
Just days ago you couldn't read a simple note. You picked up Russian very quickly!
> I have already received a transmission on the tank radio from the head of the FSB asking me to please stop
Just days ago you couldn't read a simple note. You picked up Russian very quickly!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 8 minutes later, 4 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,917
Anonymous U replied with this 3 months ago, 50 seconds later, 4 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #1,275,918
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 1 day later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #1,276,116
Well, my navigation skills must not be great. I thought I was taking the T-34 tank to Moscow, but somehow, I got turned around. I ended up back at the Gulag I was originally in! I burst through the fencing and shot guard. All of the prisoners escaped! I'm a liberation hero! I haven't seen the anti-Throckmorton again yet. Well, the tank ran out of gas, so Eric my lupine companion and I had to get out. In the Gulag, we found a stolen American F-22 Raptor fighter jet! Based on my knowledge of aviation from Microsoft Flight Simulator, I was able to fly it as far as it would go. I landed I then the fuel was almost out. Guess where I ended up? Back at Dyatlov Pass! It's like this place is supernatural and does not want me to leave! Eric and I have built an igloo. I'm staying away from the bunker this time. As we slept last night, we heard more sniffing and scratching around the igloo. This morning, I plan to go explore some more. more to come!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) double-posted this 3 months ago, 1 day later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #1,276,370
God help me, I am trapped in the Dyatlov Pass! I keep leaving and trekking in a straight line with Eric my lupin companion, but no matter which direction we travel, we end back, up at the Pass! Last night, as we slept, a groaning and moaning came from outside the igloo. This morning I found cloven hoof prints in the snow. I am terrified, frankly. I fear Eric and I must return to the zombie bunker to find supplies. This time, I am going to take the MIG out and fly it to Moscow. Surely, a fighter jet will not circle back around to Dyatlov Pass on its own volition. Something else happened as well last night. I kept hearing a raspy voice whispering "Throckmorton! Throckmorton!" Who could it be? Wish us luck as we return to the bunker to get the MIG!
Anonymous M replied with this 3 months ago, 36 minutes later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #1,276,379
Time to lock the thread
Anonymous U replied with this 3 months ago, 55 minutes later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #1,276,393
@previous (M)
I was actually wondering how long he'd go on if he suddenly stopped getting any replies. From above, we see it's at least two. I'd guess it'd be 4, nearly 5 consecutive posts with no replies before he abandons the thread.
I was actually wondering how long he'd go on if he suddenly stopped getting any replies. From above, we see it's at least two. I'd guess it'd be 4, nearly 5 consecutive posts with no replies before he abandons the thread.
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 1 day later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #1,276,805
Strange! This morning as Eric and I woke up and exited the igloo, there were more cloven hoofprints, but the MIG was gone! In its place was a German WWII Landkreuzer P. 1000 "Ratte"!!! This is a giant tank larger than a large house! Inside, there's a functioning kitchen, bunks, living quarters and all sort of other amenities. It's all fueled up and ready to go. Obviously, someone wants me to drive it, which I will. Eric and I shall spend the night inside it tonight, but as for today, I am determined to find the fake Throckmorton. We have set out on foot toward the hill where I first saw him. I am armed with a loaded and functional AK-47, a rocket launcher, and of course Eric my wolf companion. I am going to get to the bottom of this Doppelgänger mystery! More to come!
Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg (OP) double-posted this 3 months ago, 4 days later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #1,277,997
@previous (Throckmorton !dxiFV8kfVg)
My God! Eric and I reached the hill on foot, where I found...the false Throckmorton! He looks and talks and acts just like me! I asked him who he was, and he said that he comes from THIS place -- Minichan!!! I could not stand it. I attacked him. He and I wrestled for hours until sunset. Finally, he said, "Let me go, and I will bless you." I agreed, and I let him go. He touched my thigh and wounded me, but then he turned into light and rose up into the sky! Apparently, he was an angel! Well, Eric and I ran back to camp where my German WWII Landkreuzer P. 1000 "Ratte" awaited. We climbed inside the monster tank and we are living there for now. I plan to drive it to Moscow tomorrow and finally be saved! More to come!
My God! Eric and I reached the hill on foot, where I found...the false Throckmorton! He looks and talks and acts just like me! I asked him who he was, and he said that he comes from THIS place -- Minichan!!! I could not stand it. I attacked him. He and I wrestled for hours until sunset. Finally, he said, "Let me go, and I will bless you." I agreed, and I let him go. He touched my thigh and wounded me, but then he turned into light and rose up into the sky! Apparently, he was an angel! Well, Eric and I ran back to camp where my German WWII Landkreuzer P. 1000 "Ratte" awaited. We climbed inside the monster tank and we are living there for now. I plan to drive it to Moscow tomorrow and finally be saved! More to come!