| Description | Web address | Date ? | Time left |
|---|---|---|---|
| Worldwide release of the highly anticipated sequel to Harlan Ellison's "I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream", titled "I Have No Cock, and I Must Cum" | 2024-09-13 | 4 months | |
| NASA's Artemis program will land the "next" humans on the moon by the end of 2024 | https://www.nasa.gov/specials/artemis/ | 2024-12-31 | 8 months |
| A diplomat sees Bert's feet and world war 3 starts. Bert dodges the draft. | 2027-04-30 | 3.1 years | |
| AnonTalk turns 20 years old, according to his Feb 6, 2010 bulletin: "In a couple of days, AT turns two years. Feels like 20…" | https://bulletins.iwantabro.com/5 | 2028-02-09 | 3.9 years |
| Civil War 2: Electric Boogaloo | https://minichan.net/topic/100193#reply_1129942 | 2029-05-30 | 5.2 years |
| Walter finally finds the feminine dick. | 2035-05-15 | 11.3 years | |
| Cathy tells Kook what made her feel like she hates her. | 2037-09-11 | 13.7 years | |
| 100th anniversary of Syntax's invention of Syntax. | https://www.qualcomm.com | 2042-08-25 | 14 years |
| Artemis Program finally lands cows on the moon. | https://www.nasa.gov/artemisprogram | 2044-04-20 | 14 years |
| Syntax dies in 30 years, on his birthday aged 102 | 2044-08-25 | 14 years | |
| Aspergia is established, democracy is dismantled in the west, and a new wave of Juchesasang spreads the world over | 2048-02-16 | 14 years | |
| The British Empire rises again. Cornwall made the new holy land. Popeye's chicken sandwich made less spicy. | 2050-04-20 | 14 years | |
| Jesus Christ returns riding Halley's Comet. | 2061-07-28 | 14 years | |
| Sim reappears! | 2063-06-11 | 14 years | |
| OP stops being a faggot. | https://i.imgur.com/6whEqZr.png | 2083-06-21 | 14 years |
| Bush did 911 | 2101-09-11 | 14 years | |
| Years are properly sorted and time remaining is properly calculated. | https://github.com/Minichan/Minichan | 2112-12-21 | 14 years |
| cccuuunnttt stops being a cunt | 2384-05-26 | 14 years | |
| An updated version of TinyBBS is released. | https://tinybbs.org | 2451-10-10 | 14 years |
| The Constitonal amendments are changbthed | 2776-07-04 | 14 years | |
| Green finds true love | 3000-01-01 | 14 years | |
| h stops saying h | 9001-12-31 | 14 years | |
| Matt stops obsessing over everyone. | 9999-01-01 | 14 years | |
| You miss elf practice. | 9999-12-31 | 14 years |
